My Life Is Truly Blessed

God Chose My New Year's Resolution

2012-01-02T12:01:00.002-05:00

This morning, I opened up my Bible to read the devotional passage and knew as soon as I read the first two verses that God was speaking to me. I don't always make New Year's Resolutions, but I did this year because God let me know what I need to work on this year. It was truly exciting for me to realize that God was meeting me right where I was at and letting me know He would be with me every step of the way this year.

Luke 6: 27-28 says “But to you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you." Those of you who know me probably think these verses struck me because of all we've been through with our neighbors, but you would be wrong. These verses struck me because my daughter is officially going to be a teenager in one week. That's right, my daughter Sarah is turning 13 years old. Where has the time gone?!

Now, I know at least one person is probably thinking "You consider your daughter your enemy?!" No, I don't; but I think anyone who has been through the teen years with a child will understand where I'm headed with this. My daughter has always been strong willed. She has always given me an attitude when I tell her do something. She wants things HER WAY and does NOT like to be told what to do. There are days I wonder "What did I ever do to make my daughter hate me so much?!" Yet if I allow that question to verbally emerge from my lips, she will be the first one to say "I don't hate you mom!" It sure feels that way though when she is being defiant, yelling at me, arguing with me, stomping up the stairs, and/or slamming her bedroom door. Yup, my daughter is becoming a teenager and things are bound to get even worse. So, I have no doubt God gave me these verses to tell me what I've been doing wrong and show me what I need to do so that my relationship with my daughter can be repaired and strengthened.

I am going to be brutally honest again in this blog because I want everyone to know that I am not perfect. I have a feeling I am not alone in how I feel and have reacted to things in the past. I have good intentions and want my children to grow up to know, love, and serve Jesus. I want them to be honest and trustworthy individuals. I want them to know that their actions have consequences and that they need to accept those consequences if they choose to do something wrong instead of blaming someone or something else. I am the first to admit though that even though I have the best of intentions, I do not always handle things correctly and I don't always react in a Christlike manner. I have asked for forgiveness from God and from my kids numerous times. It's a good thing that God is so quick to forgive and hasn't given up on me. He knows my intentions are good and He wants to help me become the person I want to be, which is also the person He wants me to be. He understands I am not perfect and gently reminds me of things that I need to work on. Oh to be more like Him!

Getting back to those two verses, let's break them down.

1."Love your enemies". Since God brought my daughter to mind as I read these verses, I can say that I do love my daughter very much; but I also know that I don't always show it to her by my actions when she is acting like an enemy. I need to work on showing love more often. When she starts screaming at me, I don't need to scream at her. I can calmly tell her to stop speaking disrespectfully to me and to show her by example how to speak to someone respectfully. If I don't speak respectfully to her when I'm upset, how will she learn to speak respectfully when she's upset?

2. "Do good to those who hate you." When my daughter is angry with me, do I need to be angry back? Do I need to give her the silent treatment and show how mad or disappointed I am with her for the rest of the day? NO! I need to start finding a way to do nice things for her regardless of how mean she is being. I could make a meal I know she will like. We could play a game together. I know I can find something nice to do with her or for her. Eventually, she will realize how much I love her in spite of how she has acted and hopefully she will learn to change her attitude so that she can also show me how much she loves me.

3. "Bless those who curse you." No one in my family uses profanity, but "cursing" can also mean speaking at someone in a mean way, calling them names, putting them down, or just talking in a disrespectful tone. Sadly, I need to admit that I am guilty of doing all of these things when I am upset with my kids. What I need to work on this year is using more encouragement with my kids, especially when I'm upset. I need to find something to say that builds them up instead of tearing them down. I can encourage them instead of discouraging them. I need to speak kindly and respectfully to them so they learn how to do the same.

4. "Pray for those who mistreat you." This is the most important thing I need to remember to do. In the past, I have prayed.... for Sarah to change her attitude, to quit lying, to quit making excuses for her bad behavior, to stop fighting all the time, etc. What I should have been doing and what I will work on this year is for me to be praying for ME to change MY attitude and that I can find ways to show love, to encourage, and build up my kids when I'm upset so that they can learn by my example how to be a better person.

So there you have it. I'm not perfect, but I know what I am going to be working on this year so that I can get closer to becoming the person God wants me to be and who I want to be. God knew my heart. He knew I was frustrated that my relationship with my daughter was not what I wanted it to be. He knew I was frustrated with the fact that I kept failing in my attitude. I knew that I shouldn't start yelling and stuff when Sarah was giving me an attitude; yet, I would fail over and over again and get sucked into the yell and scream and say nasty stuff routine. UGH! There were times I could control it, but I failed more times than I succeeded. Thankfully, God didn't give up on me. He hasn't given up on you either. He knows the areas where you struggle and He is always willing to help you. I know there may be times I fail this year, but I know what I need to be doing and I am confident I will have more successes this year than failures. With God's help, I can do this!! And so can you!

His Compassion Never Fails

2011-11-14T12:38:00.002-05:00

Yesterday was an extremely difficult day for me. About 5 or 10 minutes before church, I found out that my friend Dottie, who I've sung with on worship team for 10 years and who I've been friends with almost from that first day, had passed away in her sleep. It came as a shock to all of us who knew and loved her. She had just had surgery on Wednesday because she had excruciating back pain for years. The doctor said she should be feeling 90% better because he had fixed a couple of different things that would have been causing her pain. She had gone back to the hospital Saturday night because she was experiencing a lot of pain. The doctors gave her some more medicines and they seemed to be working so she went back home and went to sleep. She woke up in heaven. I don't know how we sang during both services, but God gave us the strength. I came home and that's when I realized what the date was. It was November 13. That's the same date that my big sister Wendy had passed away. Yesterday was 17 years since my sister went home to be with the Lord. 17 years ago, November 13 landed on a Sunday too. So now I have lost two people I love on Sunday, November 13.

I woke up around 5 am this morning and immediately I began to think of Dottie. Part of me said "It can't be true! She can't be gone!" while another part of me was so thankful that she was no longer experiencing any pain. Of course, I thought of how much pain all of us who knew and loved her are in. Normally, I do my devotions after I am all ready to start the day, but today I decided to do it before that. My devotional called for me to read Lamentations 3:22-33. I immediately started to cry as I read the passage, but I was also comforted by the words. The verses that stuck out to me the most were the first two and the last two. Verses 22 and 23 say "Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness." Verses 32 and 33 say "Though he brings grief, he will show compassion, so great is his unfailing love. For he does not willingly bring affliction or grief to anyone."

I began to think of how unexpected Dottie's death was. No one was expecting to get that news. My sister's death was also just as unexpected. Who expects a 28 year old woman to die? She was in the hospital after giving birth. She was suppose to be going home that day. I had called her when I came home from church to tell her I had gone to the altar to pray for her babies. Her husband Joe had answered the phone and told me she wasn't feeling well and was trying to rest. He said she'd call me later, so I told him to have her call me at mom and dad's house since that's where I would be. When the phone rang at their house two hours later, I said "that's Wendy!" It wasn't. It was Joe, calling to tell us Wendy had died. Even though Dottie wasn't 28, her death caused just as much shock and sadness to all those who knew and loved her. Yet in both cases, God showed His compassion.

My sister had lost a few babies in her short life, and I don't know if she could have handled losing more. God knew that 2 of her 3 babies were going to die too, so He showed His compassion and called my sister home first. I don't know why, but I had this thought that God needed help with all the babies up in heaven, so He called my sister home to help Him because He knew how much she loved children. That thought has brought comfort to me and others who later experienced the loss of a baby or young child. I was able to share that "My sister is taking care of your child until you get there." She's also taking care of 3 of my children until I get there and can hold them.

Dottie had a zest for life. She loved to laugh. I'm sure heaven there is a lot more laughter in heaven now that Dottie is there! One of the first thoughts I had was "She's not 90% better (like the doctor had said she'd be after her surgery). She's 100% better!" Maybe the doctor was wrong and she wasn't going to feel 90% better. Maybe the pain was still going to be bad and God knew that, so He showed His compassion by calling her home so that she didn't have to deal with any more pain. I don't know that for sure of course, but it brought me comfort to be reminded that God promised in Lamentations 3:32 that "Though he brings grief, he will show compassion, so great is his unfailing love."

I know that one day I will see Wendy again. I still miss her and will until the day I die, but I know she is in heaven with her Lord and she will be there to meet me when I enter those pearly gates. I also know that I will see Dottie again, as she too had accepted Jesus as her personal Lord and Savior. I will get to hear her laugh again one day and I'll get to sing with her again too. I'm sure she'll be one of those who meets me when I get there. I will never forget either of them while I am still here on earth. Even though I am sad and will cry because I miss them, I know God will give me peace and I am so thankful for His compassion that He shows.

Watch What You Say....And How You Say It

2011-08-03T10:51:00.000-04:00

I just had to write on my blog today because God is so awesome and really taught me a lesson this morning. I was doing my devotions this morning and then read the passage where the Hidden Hearts verse for the month is located. The verse I'm memorizing this month is Ephesians 4:29 which says, "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen." As I worked on memorizing this verse, God really opened my eyes to a truth He wanted me to see and hear.

I am a stay at home mom with two children who love to bicker with each other. My oldest is strong-willed and always wants things her way. She can get rather mouthy with me, and I've been struggling for awhile with trying to not get sucked into arguments with her. As soon as I started to read Ephesians 4:29, I felt God speaking to me. I'm going to be brutally honest here and I hope you don't judge me for it. I hope this will show you that I am not perfect, but I am working on it and I will continue to grow and be a better person with God's help! When I read this verse, I knew God was talking to me about the things I say when I get upset, especially to my daughter. I know that I allow myself to let things come out of my mouth that don't build her up. I then read the last part "that it may benefit those who listen". That's when I thought of my son. I know he hears what I am saying to his sister. OUCH. So when I say something that isn't building up my daughter, it hurts her AND it hurts my son who is listening!

This obviously applies to everyone we come into contact with. We should NEVER let ANY unwholesome talk come out of our mouths. What we say should ALWAYS be helpful in building others up. Others are listening to what we say. Does what they hear us say benefit them too or does it hurt them? Wow. What a responsibility we have! I have decided today to renew again my commitment to watch what I say and not let anything come out of my mouth that isn't edifying to everyone who hears it. I want to be performing construction and not destruction. What about you?

Miracles DO Happen When God's People Pray!!

2011-07-26T21:54:00.001-04:00

I know I haven't blogged in a long time, but I felt I had to write about a little boy named Jack that I came to find out about on Facebook. A friend of mine posted a prayer request for him. She personally knew the family, and she posted the link to a board called "Praying for Jack Budensiek". I went there and started to follow the story of this little 5 year old boy.

Four weeks ago, Jack and his family were on vacation in Florida. He began to climb up a heavy piece of furniture (I believe it was a dresser) and it fell over on top of him, crushing his skull between the dresser and the tile floor. During the 10 minutes that it took for help to arrive, his dad held his son's lifeless body and begged God to save his son, not to let his son die, and to protect his brain. The doctors didn't hold out much hope of Jack surviving. They thought he was either going to die or have serious brain damage. Miraculously, Jack did survive, and he amazed doctors when he awoke from his coma and began talking and then walking. He hadn't died, and he didn't have brain damage! The doctors said they had never had anyone with as severe an injury as Jack's survive. Most of the doctors just shook their head and all they could say was "this is amazing, simply amazing" when they came in to see Jack. The doctors were talking about releasing Jack once he began eating, but all that changed a week and a day after the initial injury.

Jack's mom was holding him when he suddenly started holding his head and screaming. He then coded! They rushed Jack in to do a cat scan and then into emergency brain surgery. The doctor removed a blood clot that was THREE TIMES the size of his fist! The doctor gave the devastating news to his family: he had done all he could, but he only gave Jack a 20% chance of waking up again. This is when I found out about Jack and was burdened to join this board on Facebook along with 3,000+ other people who were all praying for Jack. I told my children (ages 12 and 7) about Jack, and they prayed for him as well. Every day, they'd ask "How's Little Jack?" My husband also prayed for Jack. The doctors as well as his family knew about the people who were praying for Jack. The doctor even told the family to have them keep praying, and pray we did!

Five days later, the doctors decided to wean him off of the medications that were keeping Jack in a coma. Doctors didn't know if Jack would wake up, but he did!! They decided to remove the breathing tube, but they weren't sure his brain would know what to do. They tube was removed, and Jack breathed 100% on his own! Five days later, Jack drew some snowmen and wrote his name! The next day, he would nod yes or no and began raising his hand (just like in school) and held it up until his family figured out what he wanted, and then he'd put it down. It was his way of communicating, but he hadn't spoken at all. They could tell he was frustrated about that, so we prayed for his communication to improve. The NEXT MORNING, Jack woke up and spoke the most precious words "Mommy hold me". Over the next few days, he began taking steps and would walk with assistance. A feeding tube had been put in because Jack hadn't had anything to eat or drink since his initial injury. His parents were thrilled one day when he took a sip of water; but he had failed numerous swallow tests so we prayed specifically that Jack would start to eat and drink. The next day, Jack asked his mom for some McDonald's chicken nuggets and fries. She figured he wouldn't be able to eat them, but she bought them anyway. Jack ate three nuggets and over half of the order of fries! He also drank sweet tea! Over the next two days, he ate numerous cheeseburgers, chicken nuggets, and fries. He was making up quickly for those three plus weeks of not eating!! Yesterday, Jack was released from the hospital!!!!!!!!!!!

This morning, I read Psalm 40:3 which says "He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see and fear the Lord and put their trust in him." I clearly heard the Lord tell me that many are going to put their trust in Him because of what He did in Jack's life. It's been awhile since I prayed so hard for someone, especially someone whom I have never met. It has been truly amazing to see how God kept answering our prayers! What has happened to Jack in the last month is nothing short of a miracle! I have witnessed what happens when God's people pray and I know that Jack is going to have an incredible testimony about the power of prayer.

I am writing this to let everyone know that God is still performing miracles today! I know God doesn't always answer us the way we want to all the time, but be encouraged to know that God hears all of our prayers! Pray and believe that God WILL answer!

Fruit of the Spirit

2011-07-06T13:47:00.001-04:00

The Hidden Hearts group I'm in has two verses for me to memorize this month. They are found in Galatians 5:22-23 and state "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Against such things there is no luck." I knew what the fruits of the Spirit were before I memorized these verses, but God really spoke to me today as I was reading the passage that included these verses.

The passage we are to read this month is Galatians 5:13-26, and then we are to memorize the two verses I quoted above. As I read through the passage, I was struck by verses 16 and 17 which say "So I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever you want." I thought of how I do experience that conflict when I say or do something that is not pleasing to the Lord.

Then I began to read verses 19-21 which state "The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God." At the start of these verses, it was easy for me to think that I didn't have a problem staying away from these. Then I saw one in particular that God seemed to put in bold print: fits of rage. As a mom of two kids, it can be very easy for me to explode when my kids have been fighting non-stop with one another or when they do something I've them a billion times not to do and especially when they choose to lie to me rather than tell the truth and just accept whatever the consequences will be. God has been making me aware of how many times I lose my cool and say things I shouldn't when I get upset. I've been working in this specific area and have gotten better, but I still have times when I simply lose it and I sadly have to admit that I go into what I call a "fit of rage". For me, my fits of rage include me yelling and screaming and saying things that no mom should ever say to her child. There are times I can catch myself before I say something, and then there are other times where I simply let those things fly out of my mouth. I feel horrible every time that happens and I have to go back and apologize for what I said. Problem is, I can't take back what was said. My child or children heard what was said and they probably won't ever forget it. I can only hope and pray that God will help my children be all He wants them to be in spite of my failures.

Since the verses that list the fruit of the Spirit come immediately after these verses, it was easy for me to see that the "fits of rage" that I deal with are clearly a lack of self-control on my part. God gently spoke to me and told me that when I feel myself getting frustrated or even angry, I need to quickly remember the fruit of the Spirit so that I can speak and act in a way that displays those fruit to my kids. I was able to put it into practice today when I instructed my children on how they were to behave and just minutes later, I discovered they had disobeyed me. I went over the fruit of the Spirit with them one by one and helped them to see that they have not been displaying the fruit of the Spirit by the way they were acting. Just a little while ago, I saw my daughter hit her brother. At first, I yelled 'Hey! Go stand in the corner!" I then told her to think about what fruit of the Spirit she was not displaying when she reacted the way she just had. After allowing her to stand in the corner for a few minutes, she came out and I asked her for her answer. At first she just said "all of them" and I had to tell her I wanted specific ones. She was then able to tell me that mostly she had not displayed self-control, kindness and goodness. I told her good, and then added that she should probably have included love in her list because hitting someone the way she had was not showing love.

Since I was brutally honest in this blog post, you can tell that I am not perfect...and I know that. Thankfully, God knows that too and He is working in and through me on a daily basis. He hasn't given up on me yet, so I haven't given up either. I know that I want to change and become all HE wants me to be. I know He will help me be the best mom I can be to my kids so that they grow up to know, love, and serve Him. What I plan on doing as much as possible from now on is stopping to pray whenever I feel myself getting frustrated or angry. I will pray for God to help me display the fruit of the Spirit in everything I say and do. I am so thankful that God knows my heart and He knows I love Him. I'm also thankful that He loves me enough to show me things that I need to change.

Work At It With All Your Heart

2011-06-03T12:09:00.000-04:00

This month's verses to memorize for my Hidden Hearts group is Colossians 3:23-24: "Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving." My first thought upon reading and memorizing those verses was that it can be scary to think about how we are working for the Lord. It definitely should improve how we do things if we kept that in mind! God wanted to teach me so much more about these verses though!

I decided to read the section where these verses were found to put them more into context. I started at verse 18 which talks about how wives should submit to their husbands. I thought to myself how that is not always an easy thing to do! I noticed that verses 23 and 24 are actually in a paragraph that begins with verse 22 which tells slaves to obey their earthly masters. My first thought upon reading that was maybe verses 23 and 24 were just geared towards letting slaves know how to focus on how they should think while working for their masters, but God quietly reminded me that we are all slaves....to sin! I knew immediately that these two verses were very relevant to all of us today!

I then felt I should go back and look at the verses in this section again, which is labeled in my Bible (NIV version) "Instructions for Christian Households". First, Colossians 3:18 addresses wives and tells us that we should submit to our husbands, as is fitting to the Lord. For some women, that is an extremely hard thing to do. Other women may find it easier to do, but they probably found it hard to do at some point in time. There may still be an occasion where they struggle with submitting. Why is it hard for us to submit? I think it is because it is a natural thing for people to want to get their own way. We want to be in control and make our own decisions. When you submit to someone, you are allowing the other person to have control. Submitting is not an easy thing to do. It takes work.

Colossians 3:19 addresses husbands and tells them to love their wives and to not be harsh to them. I know at first you might think that it should be easy for a husband to love his wife. Why then are there so many divorces? Why do so many men cheat on their wives? Men have a very strong sexual urge and sometimes they look elsewhere to get that need met. Husbands need to determine in their hearts to NOT look at another woman in the wrong way or let their minds wander so they don't fall into that sin. It is not easy. It takes work. Also, after a long day at work, it can be easy for a husband to be harsh to his wife, especially if she starts nagging him about something the second he comes through the door. Wives need to be mindful of the fact that their spouse probably needs some time to unwind before you hit them with a list of demands or even with bad news. As much as you may need/want to talk about your day, think of what your husband needs and try to give him some time to relax. For some husbands, it is very easy to just give a gruff or harsh response when they feel disrespected. Men also don't like to be wrong. Of course, women don't like to be wrong either. The problem is that most men do not find it easy to discuss their feelings, so they get harsh when they are hurt or offended. It is possible to overcome this, but it takes work.

Colossians 3:20 addresses children and how they need to obey their parents in everything. Yup, if you are a parent, you know very well how hard it is for children to obey you! When children are told they need to obey EVERYTHING their parents say, I'm sure it would seem like an impossible task for them. It is possible, but it takes work.

Colossians 3:21 tells fathers to not embitter their children or they will become discouraged. Again, most men are not good with expressing their feelings. It can be easy for them to be harsh with their children when their children are disobeying, getting mouthy, arguing, doing poorly in school, etc. If a dad always gives a harsh or critical response to their child, that child can easily become embittered and think that nothing they do is ever good enough. They may even feel unloved by their father. Dads (and moms too!) need to learn the art of thinking before they speak, especially when it comes to speaking to their children. It is definitely not an easy thing to do, especially when their child(ren) are misbehaving for the billionth time, but it is not impossible. It just takes work.

Finally, Colossians 3:22 says "Slaves, obey your earthly masters in everything; and do it, not only when their eye is on you and to curry their favor, but with sincerity of heart and reverence for the Lord." When I read this verse, I usually think of people who work as the "slaves" and the boss as the "earthly master". It makes it easier to understand then we should always be working to the best of our ability, whether the boss is watching us or not.

After reading all those verses, we then get to verses 23 and 24 which tells us that WHATEVER we do, we are to work at it with ALL our heart. If you noticed in all the previous verses, what we are commanded to do takes WORK to accomplish. No, the things in the verses are not easy to do; but they aren't impossible either! When you put your whole heart into something, you can usually get it done. It especially is easy to keep working at it when you remember that the reward you will receive for doing what the Lord commands far outweighs the hard work you put into it! As Christians, we need to keep in mind that the Lord is always watching us and He wants us to give 100% in everything we do. Whether it is the job we get paid to do here on earth or whether it is at home being a wife, husband, child, or father, we are to do everything as unto to the Lord. We are serving Him! We will receive an inheritance from Him one day. Eternal life and any riches that we earned while here on earth will be ours when we enter heaven after hearing Him say "Well done, thou good and faithful servant! Enter into the joy of the Lord!" When you look at it that way, doesn't it make it a little easier to decide to do what the Lord commands even though it may not be easy?

Philippians 4:12-13

2011-05-13T19:58:00.002-04:00

Philippians 4:12-13 says "I know what it is to be in need and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength."

I have always loved verse 13 because it is a wonderful reminder that no matter what I may face in life, I can make it through it because Christ will give me the strength I need. I don't remember when verse 12 suddenly became so meaningful to me, but I think it was sometime after I was married.

On Tuesday, May 17, my husband and I will be celebrating our 14th wedding anniversary. For the first year and a half, we both worked; but then I had Sarah and we felt my job was to be a stay-at-home mom. God definitely honored that decision and we were always in awe of how things worked out whenever we were in need. We have heard many times "I don't know how you guys make it on just one salary!" and we are always honest and tell people that we often do without things that we'd like to have because they just aren't necessary. We also let them know God has provided for us many times as well. I truly believe that is because we have put our faith in Him. We bring our requests to Him and then trust that He will answer and meet our needs.

The words "I know what it is to be in need" ring so true for us, but it is truly a marvelous thing to be content in the circumstances and have the peace of knowing that God WILL provide for us. I have seen it many times in our marriage where God met our needs in amazing ways. When Sarah began kindergarten, we had been a one-car family for 2 years. I set up doctor appointments in the afternoon so that Bob would be able to take us once he got home from work. He usually picked up the groceries we needed on his way home from work. We knew we couldn't afford to buy another car, so we were content to just make due with the one we had. Our church did a Family Fun Fest and a member of the church donated a car as the grand prize in a raffle. Bob and I chose to not buy any tickets because we didn't want to waste our money (and we felt it was like gambling). Two ladies at the MOPS group I was a part of at church told me that they had bought tickets and if either one of them won the car, they would give it to us. I was surprised and very touched, and so was Bob when I told him, but neither one of us thought too much more about it since we knew it was a long shot. To my amazement, the day after the raffle was held, one of these ladies came up to me at church and asked "I won the car. Do you want it?" Tears flowed down my face and all I could do was nod my head yes and give her a hug. I think I may have been able to mutter a thank you too. Even though we don't have that car anymore, we still remember how those people allowed God to work through them and bless us with something we needed, and we are still very thankful.

Another way God provided for us was just last year when our roof started to leak again. A few years earlier, the one skylight had caused a leak so we chose to just put a whole new roof on. Well, now the other skylight was leaking so we knew it was time to just have those skylights removed and the roof patched. We called the roofer who had done the roof the last time and he quoted us a price. We waited for two weeks, but he didn't show up and he didn't return my calls. Finally, I decided to try calling around to get other quotes. As I drove to worship team rehearsal one night, I told God the specific amount that I wanted to pay. Even the roofer we called first, who we figured was probably quoting us a very low price, was a couple of hundred dollars above the amount I told God I wanted to pay. We had a roofer who would be stopping by the next day and would give us a quote, so now I at least knew what amount he had to hit for us to accept his bid. He came in WAY over what our first roofer quoted us, so we declined and decided to just continue to wait for the first roofer to call. The next Sunday, a couple at church came up to us and gave us an envelope. They simply said they felt God wanted them to give us this. Inside was an amount of money, and I instantly realized the significance of the amount. When I took the amount that I told God I wanted to pay to have our roof fixed and added that to the amount that was in the envelope, it equaled the amount that our roofer was going to charge us! God had shown us again that because we were content in just waiting for Him to work through the situation, He rewarded us by giving us what we had asked.

If you are struggling with finances or any other situation, turn those requests over to God. Then be content in the knowledge that God knows what you need and He will provide for you in His perfect time. If it isn't in His will, then He may not answer the way you want Him to; but continue to be content because God knows what is best! Once you learn to be content in life, you will have such a peace because you know God is the one in control.

Philippians 4:8-9

2011-05-12T07:30:00.000-04:00

Yesterday I talked about four verses in Philippians 4 that I had memorized. If you didn't read that post, the verses come from Philippians 4:4-7 "Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again-Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." As I opened my Bible up to the passage I need to read this month for my "Hidden Hearts" group, I decided to let God lead me as to whether or not there were more verses in this passage that He wanted me to memorize so I could hide them in my heart. His answer was a resounding 'YES!'

So, this morning, I memorized the next two verses in the passage: Philippians 4:8-9 "Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable-if anything is excellent or praiseworthy-think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me or seen in me - put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you."

The first thing that jumped out at me was the first part of verse 9 "Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me or seen in me - put it into practice." I am not only a mom to two kids, but I also teach them at home, so I was attracted to this verse because I want my kids to do what I tell them to do and learn whatever it is that I'm teaching them. Then I felt God gently point out that the verse says "whatever". Do I really want my kids to put into practice anything that they have heard from me or seen in me? Are the things I say and do always excellent and praiseworthy? Ouch! Sadly, the answer was no.

This morning I ended my devotions with a new desire to live my life in such a way that I am an excellent example of what a Christian should be. I want my kids and anyone who hears or sees me to know that they can put into practice whatever I have said or done. Who is watching what your say and do? Are your words and actions something you want others to put into practice? If not, why not make the same commitment I did and work harder at setting a better example to those around you?

Philippians 4:4-7

2011-05-11T08:50:00.001-04:00

I decided to join a women's group at my church called "Hidden Hearts". At the beginning of each month, the pastor's wife will send an e-mail with a Bible verse to memorize. She also includes other verses that are in that passage so you can see the context where the verse you are to memorize comes from. We are to read that passage daily and journal what we feel God is telling us about the verse (or verses). I attended our annual church's women's retreat April 29-May 1 and that's when I first heard about this group. It had been formed a few month's before, but I hadn't been at the event where they first discussed forming it. Anyway, I thought it was a great idea when I heard about it at the retreat, but I forgot to go up after the meeting to sign up and get a journal. This past Sunday, it was announced again and they opened it up to all the ladies at the church. I was singing on worship team so I didn't have a chance right away to go up and get a journal. By the time I had a chance to do so, the journals were all gone. It's GREAT that so many women are interested in this group! Yesterday, I e-mailed the pastor's wife and told her I was interested in joining and she immediately sent me a message with this month's verse and surrounding text. I believe there are about 95 women now involved in "hiding God's Word in their heart". Isn't that awesome?!

The verse we are to memorize this month is Philippians 4:6. The passage is Philippians 4:4-20. I will continue to give the reference for any verse because I learned it is important to also memorize WHERE it is found when you memorize a verse because then you can tell others where it is found. The first thing I noticed when I turned to the passage this morning was that I had already had most of those verses highlighted in my Bible. I went to work on memorizing verse 6 and soon had it memorized. I will continue to say it every day to ensure it really is "hidden in my heart" because I know it can be easy to memorize something one day and not remember it the next! I then started to read the passage and felt compelled to memorize the first few verses. I did read the entire passage then, but I want to journal what I learned by memorizing the verses I did today. I do not have my Bible in front of me, nor do I have the verses written down anywhere in front of me either. This will all be from memory.

Philippians 4:4 says "Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!" It is easy to rejoice and praise the Lord when things are great, but how about when we are going through a painful or difficult time? How is it possible to rejoice ALWAYS? God brought to mind that He is always with us. We have the promise in the Bible that He will never leave us or forsake us. I have experienced many times that I am able to help someone us as a result of going through a difficult time myself. I especially like the poem "Footprints" because it describes how God carries us when we are going through difficult times. What better reason to rejoice is there than that?!

Philippians 4:5 says "Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near." I first had to say "OUCH!" when I read and memorized that verse because it is very hard for me to display gentleness when I am frustrated with my kids. When they are not listening or obeying me, it can be very easy to lose my cool and yell. I have been working on this and have made progress, but I definitely have a way to go. I know God doesn't expect me to be perfect because He knows I am human, but I want my kids to see Jesus in me all the time. If I didn't think it was hard to display patience and gentleness to everyone, this verse reminds me that the Lord is near. I took this two ways. First, the Lord is always near us. He hears and sees everything that we do, which is an excellent reminder of how important it is for me to be patient and gentle! I do NOT want the Lord hearing me not displaying gentleness to anyone! I also took "The Lord is near" as a reminder that the Lord will be returning again soon. I don't want to be the reason my kids don't make it to heaven! I don't want to be the reason for even one person to not make it to heaven! This verse helped me to see how important it is for me to really work on always be gentle so that others can see Jesus in me.

Philippians 4:6 says "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God." I'll be honest. After reading verse 5, I was a little anxious! When I read the first part of verse 6, I just had to smile. I don't think it was a coincidence at all that the words of this verse came when they did. It's a wonderful reminder that we don't need to be anxious about ANYTHING because we know we can come to God with our requests. We also can be thankful when we come to God in prayer because we know that He will hear us, and He will answer us in His perfect timing too.

Philippians 4:7 says "And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." This is the perfect verse to summarize the previous three verses. If we rejoice in the Lord ALWAYS, if we are gentle so that ALL can see it, and if we do not allow ourselves to be anxious about anything, but instead thankfully bring our requests to God in prayer....we will have the PEACE of God! I have experienced God's peace and it is indeed beyond understanding. I can't explain why I feel this indescribable peace in the midst of trials and difficulties, but I know it is there and I know it is from God. How wonderful to think that we can have this peace guarding our hearts and minds, so we won't feel worried about anything because we know God is in control. Instead of being worried, we can be thankful and rejoice!

I know this I hope that something I said will help someone see the wonderful promises that can be found in these four verses. I hope it will also encourage someone to decide to hide God's Word in your heart. How amazing it will be to be able to quote scripture whenever you need it because it is hidden in your heart. I will try to post the verse each month that I am working on as well as the passage to read daily that includes this verse in case anyone chooses to also be a member of the "Hidden Hearts" group.

Tear Down the Wall

2011-04-19T13:51:00.000-04:00

In Ephesians 2:11-22, Paul talks about how the Jews and the Gentiles are reconciled through Christ. I especially like verses 14-16 which say "For he himself is our peace, who has made the two groups one and has destroyed the barrier, the dividing wall of hostility, by setting aside in his flesh the law with its commands and regulations. His purpose was to create in himself one new humanity out of the two, thus making peace, and in one body to reconcile both of them to God through the cross, by which he put to death their hostility."

Yesterday, a friend of mine made a comment that hurt me. I could have decided to not say anything and just hold in the hurt, but I have learned that is not the best thing to do. Holding in hurt only gives the devil a foothold. He will cause that hurt to eat away at you, and a wall usually goes up between you and that person who hurt you. If you put up enough walls, soon no one can get close to you. That is NOT what God wants! There are always going to be people who disagree with you, and you will not always agree with others on all issues. God made each and every one of us and we are all different. There are definitely issues that are "hot topics" that people usually have passionate opinions on and won't be easily swayed to believe a different way. This was the case yesterday. I gave my opinion on an issue and my friend didn't agree with me. I admit that I was very hurt at first, but I knew I needed to address it with her instead of holding it in. I typed out a message to her and I really tried to make sure I didn't say anything to hurt her. After a little while, I hadn't heard from her so I went back and reread what I had said. I noticed that I might have said some things in a way that may have been taken wrong. I quickly wrote another note explaining that I hope I hadn't hurt her and I apologized if I had. My friend wrote back shortly thereafter and apologized as well. I don't think either one of us wanted this disagreement to harm our friendship.

There will always be something that you disagree with others on. How do you handle it when someone disagrees with you? What do you do if someone says something that hurts you? Do you confront that person or hold it in? If you confront, is it done lovingly or do you try to hurt them the way you were hurt? Holding hurt in builds walls, but so does constantly being hurt by harshly spoken words. Ephesians 4: 2-3 says "Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace." Let's all work to build unity among others instead of walls. If you know you have built a wall between you and someone else, do whatever you can to tear down that wall. Go to that person and apologize. If they had hurt you, be honest about what they said and how it made you feel. Even if that relationship can't be saved, you tore down a wall that won't get in the way of another relationship. Don't allow those walls to be built!

Is There Light in Your Eyes?

2011-04-12T12:31:00.000-04:00

This morning I read Luke 11: 34 which says "Your eye is the lamp of your body. When your eyes are healthy, your whole body also is full of light. But when they are unhealthy, your body also is full of darkness." Initially, I thought of how there are certain people that I can just look in their eyes and can tell that they are "evil". There is such a darkness in their eyes that I can tell that there is something very bad about that them. I then thought of this question: What do people see when they look in MY eyes? I know I am not perfect, but I am a Christian so I am sure there is more light than darkness. I could have allowed myself to say "Of course people see light when they look in my eyes!" and felt pretty good about myself. God had a way of putting this into perspective though by asking me another question that really made me think. He asked "How brightly is that light in your eyes shining?" Ouch! Yes, there are things in my life that I am struggling with. God is working on areas of my life that He wants me to be better in. I truly believe that sin in my life dims the light that people are able to see when they look at me. I made a new commitment to God to do my best to ensure that the light people see in my eyes when they look at me becomes brighter and brighter. What do people see when they look in YOUR eyes? Is there a light in your eyes? How bright is that light? What can you do to make that light brighter?

God's Perfect Timing

2011-04-07T13:32:00.001-04:00

Yesterday I was made aware of how amazing God's timing can be. My husband works as a security screener at a nearby airport and therefore he's an essential government employee. He came home from work yesterday and told me that if the government budget is not passed by Friday, he will have to work for free. If an employee doesn't show up for work, they will be fired. Any time off that they did have previously scheduled and approved will not be allowed until the budget is passed. After the budget is passed, they will receive all the pay that they are due.

If this had happened just a month or two ago, this would have sent us into a panic. For the most part, we live paycheck to paycheck. We are a one income family and depend on his paycheck every two weeks. So why were we not sent into a panic? We received our income tax return the other week and have enough money in the bank now for awhile. The beginning of every year is always a scary time for us as we hope that we get that check from the government before our money runs out. As soon as I heard my husband's announcement, I just had to breathe a sigh of thanks to God that this occured at the perfect time. We don't need to panic because we know we'll be ok, unless of course it takes quite a few months before the budget gets passed.

I had read about the budget not being passed on Tuesday and, to be honest, I was actually hoping that the Republicans don't sign the budget if they are holding out because they know Obama has stuff in the budget that isn't necessary. I have confidence that they are trying to help decrease the enormous deficit instead of continuing to increase it like Obama has consistently done. I had read about the millions of dollars the president wants to sent to other countries who will never pay us back, and I have to believe that there are some intelligent men who are voting to not pass this budget because they realize we should be helping our country get out of debt instead of going further into debt giving money away to countries who don't need it. That may not be a popular opinion with everyone, but it is my opinion. Since this is my blog, I should be able to voice my opinion...so please don't attack me! LOL! Thankfully, my husband shares the same opinion as me and we are both praying that the budget gets passed only when it is the best for our country. It is a scary thought to think that it could take a long time before the budget gets passed and we could run out of money, but God has given me a peace by showing me that this happened in His perfect timing so I don't need to worry right now. He's in control and He will continue to take care of us!

The other day, I caught myself wondering how long things would be good between the neighbors and us. For those who may not know, we've lived here for 9 years and have had trouble with the one neighbor almost from day one. We have tried to be patient and kind, but it was not easy when the neighbor would consistently do stuff just to tick my husband off. My husband did lose his temper a few times, but he never hit the neighbor (even though he REALLY wanted to a number of times!). Most of the time, he'd come inside and gripe and complain to me about how mad or frustrated he was about something the neighbor was doing. I gladly listened and tried my best to calm him down. I was thankful I had a husband who was doing everything he could to protect his family. I understood his anger and frustration, but I also knew it didn't do any good to allow the neighbor to see that because it just made him try all the harder because he knew he was getting to my husband. Last year, the neighbor's mom fell and broke her elbow. She was laying outside yelling for help and I never heard her because she was at the back of their house and I was at the front of our house with the air conditioner on. When I finally did hear a commotion, I immediately went to see if there was anything I could do to help. It didn't matter to me that it was the neighbors who hated us. I simply asked "Do you need help?" Even though they had already called the ambulance and there wasn't anything I could do, it softened their hearts knowing that I had asked. Over the course of that week, I asked the son a few times how his mom was and he always spoke kindly to us. I brought them cookies at Christmas and the mom hugged me. My husband has been able to talk to the neighbor a few times in the last year and no arguing has occured. It startled me the first time I heard my husband talking outside and realized he was talking to the neighbor and no one was screaming or cursing (my husband doesn't curse but we sure have heard the neighbor use some colorful language!). Anyway, I caught myself wondering this week how much longer this friendliness between us would last. Yesterday, my husband saw an ambulance outside and I went to check what was wrong. I saw the paramedics at the neighbor's house. The son happened to turn around so I asked, "Is everything ok?". He told me his mom had fallen and hurt her leg. I said I was sorry and then went back inside. When he returned from the hospital, I went out and asked how his mom was. He said she had broken her femur near the kneecap and it would take about 6 weeks for it to heal. I told him I would be praying for her and he thanked me. I then went inside and thanked God for yet another opportunity to show our neighbor's that we care inspite of everything we have gone through with them.

This morning, I woke up and the first thing on my mind was how this situation with the budget and my husband possibly having to work for free for awhile was on my mind. I smiled as I again thought, "This couldn't have happened at a better time." I picked up my Bible to do my devotions and one verse really caught my attention because of one particular word in it: peace. Hebrews 12:11 says "No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it." I am fully aware how painful a father's discipline can be! My dad believed in spanking, and all I can say is OUCH!! I then thought of the two situations I shared with you above: finances and our neighbors. We have struggled for years regarding our finances. Has it been pleasant? No! But we always tried to stay faithful to God and trust that He would supply our needs, which He always did. Today, God showed me that because we are now experiencing the peace mentioned in that verse because we have gone through difficult times and stayed true to Him. We have gone through difficult times with the neighbors and even though we may not have handled things exactly the way He wanted us to, we tried our best to display God's love and forgiveness to them. We now are experiencing peace in this situation because we endured those difficult times and kept trusting that God would see us through and keep us safe.

I am so thankful for God's perfect timing and for the peace that only He can give. It isn't fun to go through difficulties or discipline, but we have God's promise that better times are ahead if we stay true to Him and learn from those difficult times or those times when God needed to discipline us. He loves us. He wants the best for us. It may not seem like it when we are in the midst of a trying time, but I can tell you with 100% certainty that He WILL allow you to experience a wonderful peace if you stay faithful to Him.

Asking for Help

2011-04-04T08:05:00.000-04:00

I don't know how I did it, but the spine in my upper back between the shoulder blades must have a bone or two out of place. Last night was when the pain started and nothing I have done since then has eased the pain. Picking up my head, sitting up, and even taking a deep breath all cause a tremendous amount of pain to surge through me. My husband is at work so I had my kids try to massage it and apply as much pressure as they could to the area in an effort to try and pop the bone or bones back into place. My son even sat on my back and rocked back and forth to no avail. I finally told them to stop and then proceeded to try and get up from the floor so I could start my day. Once I finally was able to get up, which took quite a while because of how painful it was to move, I decided to start by doing my devotions.

I turned to the passage in II Timothy 2:1-7 and began reading. I actually laughed when I read verse 3 which says "Join with me in suffering, like a good soldier of Christ Jesus." Yup, God has a great sense of humor sometimes. I finished reading the devotional and then picked up my journal to write. The first thing I said was how hard it was to concentrate on His word when I was in so much pain. I really thought I was just going to cry out to Him for healing so that my back would stop hurting, but He had something else He wanted me to realize.

He brought to mind that I didn't ask the kids to help me when I was trying to get up from the floor. They were both there and could see how much pain I was in. I know if I had asked them to help, they would have gladly done whatever they could have to help me. I don't even remember if one of them had asked "Can I help?", but I know my answer would have been "no" because I wouldn't have wanted one of them to get hurt or to feel bad if they weren't successful in their efforts to help me get up. I then had the dreaded "Why" questions pop into my head. Why had I not asked for their help? Why did I do it on my own and suffer with all that pain when I probably wouldn't have felt so much pain if I had asked for help? I'm sure you can see where this is headed too. God was using exactly what I was going through to teach me a valuable lesson.

Why had I not asked my kids for their help? I didn't want one of them to get hurt. I'm much bigger than they are and I don't know that they would have been much help anyway. Then God asked "Why don't you ask ME for help when you need it?" I certainly couldn't answer that the same way I answered the first question! God is so much bigger and more powerful than me. I realized though that there are times I do try to do things on my own and I struggle through it, when I could have had it so much easier had I just asked God for His help. That's when I realized that the second why question that had popped into my head could also be applied here. Why did I do it on my own and suffer with all that pain when I probably wouldn't have felt so much pain if I had asked for help? When someone assists you in getting up, your muscles don't have to work as hard and therefore the pain would more than likely have been lessened since my muscles wouldn't have been pulling on the bones that are out of alignment in my back and causing me pain. How many times have I tried to do things on my own and had to go through pain because I didn't ask God for help first? God doesn't want us to be in pain. He loves us! He wants to help us! WHY would I not ask for help from my all-powerful Savior?! Why would I choose to suffer and struggle to get through something when I could simply ask God to help me and lessen or even remove that pain?

I don't know what you are going through, but I do know that God is able to help. There is nothing He can't do. Don't struggle through it alone. Allow God to help ease the load. Be free from the pain that struggling through it in your own power causes. Feel God's power as He works. Don't be afraid to ask for help!

Look Ahead, Not Behind

2011-03-30T11:46:00.000-04:00

I have become increasingly aware of the fact that I need to work on being more patient with my children, especially my strong-willed daughter. I also know that I tend to say things I shouldn't when I get upset, and then I go back later and apologize for what I said. I want my children to know how to handle difficult situations in a Godly way and I was not setting a very good example! The other Sunday, the pastor at church did a sermon and at the end, we wrote down our sin that we struggle with on a small piece of paper. We then walked up to a cross and nailed that piece of paper to the cross, putting our sin back where it belonged. I knew immediately what I wanted to write on that paper. I wrote how I needed to be more patient and watch what I say when I am angry or frustrated. It felt wonderful to put that sin back on the cross and walk away!

This week, God has been dealing with me on all of this again. On Monday, I read Philippians 2:4 in my devotions. It says, "Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others." My first thought upon reading that verse was "Ouch! I hear you, Lord!" I knew God was reminding me of how I want my kids to listen to what I am saying, but I don't want to listen to what they have to say. If they are disobeying, I don't want to listen to their excuses. I just want them to listen to what I saying. It was clear to me that I needed to learn to listen to them more so I could show them that they are important to me. I know I am constantly telling my daughter that she needs to not talk so much and she needs to listen more. I remind her that she has two ears and one mouth so she is suppose to listen twice as much as she talks. I guess God was letting me know to take my own advice! I too need to learn to talk less and listen more.

Yesterday morning, my devotions were flooded with verses and statements that spoke so clearly to me. Proverbs 15:1 says "A soft answer turns away wrath." and James 1:19 tells us to be "slow to speak". At the very end of the devotional (I use Our Daily Bread) is usually a poem and what I call the thought for the day. Yesterday's poem was the following by someone with the last name of Hess:

Lord, set a guard upon my lips,
My tongue control today,
Help me evaluate each thought
And watch each word I say.

The thought for the day was "Bite your tongue before your tongue bites others."
Again I was amazed at how God made it crystal clear to me what He was trying to teach me. I finished up my devotions by praying and simply letting God know that I would obey His word. Little did I know just how quickly all this would be put to the test.

Yesterday, my daughter tested me to my maximum. In the afternoon, she did something that definitely deserved punishment. When I discovered what she did, I didn't use a gentle voice. I screamed at the top of my lungs. I was so angry and so hurt by what she had done that I lost it. Later, I felt horrible when I realized that I had again failed God in the way I had handled things. Yes, my daughter needed to know that what she had done was wrong and she needed to suffer the consequences for her actions; but I knew I should have walked away until I could calmly and rationally speak to her about how wrong it was for her to do what she had done. I felt so defeated. Then my nephew Timothy called me. He had seen my status on Facebook that said I needed prayer and he wanted to make sure I was ok. We talked for awhile and one thing he said to me really stuck in my head. He said "God chose you to be Sarah's mom because He knew you would be the best person to teach her God's ways." I'm amazed at the wisdom of this young man, and I am truly blessed to be called his aunt! I'm so proud of the fact that he recently has accepted the call into the ministry! He's going to be an amazing pastor!

This morning, I picked up my Bible to do my devotions and quietly said "Lord, I need to hear your voice." My throat had started to hurt last night and it was still hurting this morning. I knew my cold seems to be coming back and I felt that this was my punishment for screaming at my daughter. God already knew how I was feeling, and that I needed to hear from Him. He answered me in such an amazing way that I could only cry out of thanksgiving for His love for me. A few verses in I Samuel 12 seemed to leap out of the page as I read them. The first verse I noticed was verse 20 which says "Do not be afraid, Samuel replied. You have done all this evil; yet do not turn away from the Lord, but serve the Lord with all your heart." Tears welled up in my eyes. I felt that even though I had failed, the Lord was telling me to not turn away from Him. He wanted me to just continue to serve Him with all my heart. The next verse that jumped out at me was verse 22 which says "For the sake of his great name the Lord will not reject his people, because the Lord was pleased to make you his own." Again I was overwhelmed. God wasn't rejecting me. I belong to Him! I am one of His people and He was pleased when He made me! Next came verse 23b which says, "I will teach you the way that is good and right." I cried again because that is my goal! That is what I want to do with my kids! I want to teach them what is good and right. It was just as if God was showing me that He would show me what is good and right so that I could accomplish what my goal is too! The final verse I read was verse 24 which says, "But be sure to fear the Lord and serve Him faithfully with all your heart; consider what great things he has done for you." God was reminding me to remember all that He has already done for me. He has forgiven me before and He will continue to do so as long as I seek His forgiveness. I can continue to faithfully serve the Lord with all my heart because He is faithful to forgive me and show me what He wants me to do.

As if all these verses weren't enough, God continued to speak to me through the poem and thought for the day. The poem was by D. De Haan. It said:

Sins confessed you must forget;
Look not back to yesterday-
Full of failure and regret;
Look ahead and seek God's way.

Finally, the thought for the day was "Don't let yesterday's failures bankrupt tomorrow's efforts." Wow! I so needed to read that! God was so clearly telling me to forget about my failure yesterday. He had already forgiven and forgotten about it. I just needed to look ahead and keep trying my best to live my life His way.

I don't know who else may read this, but I know that God wanted me to share what He has been teaching me. Usually that means someone else will need to hear these things too. No matter what your sin may be or what you struggle with, I know God will forgive you too. Don't give up! It's easy to get frustrated and feel defeated when you keep failing at something you are trying so hard to overcome. We are human and God loves each and every one of us just the way we are. Don't allow yourself to be defeated by your failures. Ask for His help and keep pressing forward!

Through the Difficulties

2011-02-15T15:30:00.001-05:00

Don't you just love it when you are doing your devotions and God tells you something that you really needed to hear? That is what happened to me this morning, and I just knew that I had to share it on here. I hope it helps someone else the way it helped me.

Isaiah 43:2 says "When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze." We all face difficulties in our life, but their severity will be different. When our struggle is minor, it may just take a little work to get through it...like needing to swim across a swimming pool in order to get out. Isn't it an amazing thing to know that God promises that He will always be there, even if we don't feel like we need His help? Other times, it may feel like we are in a raging river and everything we do is a struggle. We may feel like we are drowning, but God promises that those "waves" won't sweep over us! We will make it across our "river"! Then there are those extremely difficult times, like walking through a fire. Fire refines and purifies. It is during these darkest and hardest times that God is getting rid of junk in our lives and is purifying us so that WHEN we make it out of the "fire", we are more like Him. Even in the midst of these times, God promises that we will not be hurt or destroyed. It may feel that way, but God's promises are true. We just need to trust in His promises and keep moving forward.

Did you notice that this verse always says when? WHEN you go through the water, WHEN you go through the river, WHEN you go through the fire. It's not IF we face a difficult situation, it's WHEN you face it. We have to face difficulties in order for God to teach us what He wants us to learn. The verse also points out that we have to go THROUGH the difficult times. It would be nice to just be able to avoid them somehow, but that would not allow us to experience God's presence and see how He works in and through us as a result of what we just went through.

God simply let me know this morning that I have to go through the difficult times that come along so that I can be purified and made more like Him. I realized how many times I have disappointed Him because I didn't handle the difficult situation the way He wanted me to; and therefore, I didn't learn what He was trying to teach me. He pointed out an ongoing situation that I continue to struggle in. It was an ouch moment for a little bit, but then I had to smile because I knew that He was pointing it out to me because He loves me. He wanted me to be aware of the fact that He wants and needs me to learn how to deal with this so I can be more like Him. I know I probably won't be successful immediately, but I have a whole new outlook and I am more optimistic that He will work ALL things out for His good if I am faithful in doing things HIS way instead of my own.

Obviously I don't know what every person who read this blog is going through. What I do know is this: God WILL be there WHEN you go through a difficult time. You WILL make it through the difficulties and you'll be stronger because of it! NOTHING can harm or destroy you when you rely on God's strength and wisdom to see you through. BELIEVE in His promises because they are always true! God wants to teach you something through these difficulties you face. WHEN you make it through, you will be more like Christ. Trust Him!

Who Are You Trying to Please?

2011-02-01T17:01:00.001-05:00

It amazes me how often God speaks so clearly to people, even though we may not always hear it. Sometimes we don't hear it because we aren't listening. Sometimes we don't hear it because we don't want to. Whenever I pick up the Bible to read, I try my best to listen to what God may be saying to me. That isn't always easy to do when my little boy seems to know exactly when I pick up my Bible to do devotions and somehow that means he's suppose to come into my room and start chatting away. LOL! Some days he doesn't like to hear "Please go back upstairs and play so that mommy can read her Bible and do devotions.", but he's learning that it's important for mommy to do that and he's usually good about going back upstairs to play for a few more minutes.

Yesterday in my devotions was one of those times that God spoke to me loud and clear. In I Thessalonians 2:4b, Paul says, "We are not trying to please people but God, who tests our hearts." Then again in verse 6a, he says: "We were not looking for praise from people, not from you or anyone else". I immediately thought of the fact that I had just sang on worship team the day before and I could almost hear God reminding me of that and asking "Who are you trying to please?"

I have been singing in front of people ever since I was a little girl. As I have gotten older, I have become aware of how easy it can be to love hearing the compliments I receive after I have sung. It's easy to think of how all eyes are on you as you are standing up in front of everyone. I have seen how some people focused too much on that attention and their ministry did not seem to be as effective. I realized it was because their focus was not where it should have been. I always try to keep in mind that I am not singing at the front of the church to get attention from people or to hear others tell me how nice I sing. I do my best to focus on one thing: I am singing for God, and God alone!

I then thought of how easy it can be to seek approval from people. We all want people to like us. We enjoy getting compliments from people. I'm not saying it is wrong to give or receive a compliment, but we shouldn't be doing something just to get those compliments. Whenever we do something, we should be doing it to the best of our ability. It's easy to see that would please people when we do this; but more importantly, it pleases God! In Colossians 3:23-24 it says "Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving."

So, now for the challenge. The next time you are doing something, stop and think "Who am I trying to please?" If the answer is anyone other than God, then try to get your focus back where it needs to be.

God Sees Everything

2011-01-12T13:17:00.000-05:00

As I read my devotions today, I noticed that a particular sentence kept reappearing. In Matthew 6, Jesus said three times: "Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you." It is found in verses 4,6, and 18 and was said in regard to giving, praying, and fasting. We are not to do things just so other people notice and praise us for what we did. If we do that, we've already received our reward here on earth and we won't receive one in heaven. I don't know about you, but I'd much rather receive a reward from God Himself than from anyone here on earth!

What came to my mind each time I read "Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you." was the fact that I sing on the worship team at my church. I know God has given me the gift of singing, but I am obviously not using that gift "in secret". Yes, I do sing when no one else can hear me; but I can't sing in secret when I'm standing up on the stage. It was then that I realized God was reminding me of my attitude when I was singing. It can be easy to get into the mindset of wanting to hear compliments from people when you are doing something up front for all to see. It can be easy to feel upset when the same people always get solos, and you are not one of those who get one. I've dealt with these feelings a lot, but Satan continues to try to trip me up and get me to focus on the wrong things. What I have tried to do is keep my focus on God. He is the one I'm singing to. He is the one who has given me this gift and I want to praise Him with it. I don't need to hear other people tell me how pretty I sounded. I don't need to sing a solo so everyone can hear just my voice. God hears ME every time that I sing, even if no one else can!! God wants me to focus on HIM when I sing, not anyone else. When I keep my focus on Him, I am worshipping Him the way He wants and He accepts that offering.

I'm sure there are others who may read this blog that are using a gift or talent that God has given to them and it something public, that all can see. Maybe you are discouraged because you feel that no one cares or appreciates what you do. Maybe you never hear "thank you" for what you do. I understand that it can be easy to get frustrated and maybe even cause you to consider quitting what you are doing. I just want to encourage you to NOT get discouraged when people don't acknowledge all that you do. Be reminded of the promise that GOD sees what is done "in secret". To me, "in secret" refers to that what people cannot see. God sees your heart and therefore your motives. Others may not know what your true motives are for doing things, but God does. You WILL be rewarded if you are doing what God has called you to do if you are doing it with pure motives. Hearing God say "Thank You!" will be far better than hearing it from people here on earth! Persevere! Keep doing what you are doing and don't let Satan get you discouraged when he tries to tell you no one notices or cares. He is a liar! GOD notices and He cares!

The Cookie Angel

2010-12-12T14:14:00.000-05:00

I know some of you who read my blog are aware of what we've gone through with our neighbors. For those of you who don't know the situation, suffice it to say we've had trouble with these neighbors the entire time we've lived here (9 years in September). Almost from the start, we've felt it was a spiritual battle because we are Christians and these people obviously are not. We tried to stay to ourselves, but sometimes it was close to impossible when they would get verbally abusive and would threaten my husband whenever he did say anything.

A few months ago, I was in the living room and the air conditioner was on. I turned off the air and immediately became aware that there was a lot of noise coming from outside. At first, I ignored it because I thought it was an argument. As I continued to hear raised voices, I realized that something was wrong. I opened the front door, but I didn't see anything. I could, however, hear the voices were in our neighbor's back yard. I went to our back door and opened it. I saw some people in the neighbor's yard and I asked if someone needed help. They replied no because the lady's son was handling it. It was then I saw the neighbor give me a look that at first I thought was an angry glare, so I simply said "OK." and I closed the door. A few minutes later, I noticed an ambulance pull up and the neighbor's mom was loaded in. A week later, I saw our neighbor outside when we came home from church. I decided to ask him how his mom was doing. He was on his cell phone so I waited. He kept looking at me so I knew he too wanted to say something, so I silently breathed a prayer for God to help our words to be pleasing to Him. When he got off the phone, I asked how his mom was and he said that she had broken her elbow and was getting surgery the next day on it. He then thanked me for asking if they needed help! I apologized that I hadn't heard her cries for help sooner, but I was at the front of the house with the air conditioner on and it wasn't until I had turned off the air conditioner that I heard the commotion. He understood and accepted my apology. I truly think that the fact that I had gone to see if they needed help in spite of how awful they have treated us for 9 years made an impression on him, and then I apologized on top of that for not hearing sooner.

Since that initial conversation, we've talked to them a few times. Our conversations may not always be real long, and some are just to say hello, but it is a huge improvement considering the words being spoken by all are said with kindness instead of anger. Yesterday, my husband and my son were out hunting so my daughter and I decided to make Christmas cookies. Before starting the last batch, I was putting the cookies that had cooled into a container and I realized we had A LOT of cookies. I felt impressed to take some cookies over to our neighbors. To be honest, I have felt like doing that before, but I was sure they'd probably just throw them in the garbage thinking we were trying to kill them or something! LOL! This time, however, I didn't hesitate. I went to find a container and put in a few cookies. I walked next door and rang the doorbell. I was invited in and simply said that I had been making Christmas cookies and I wanted to give some to them if they wanted them. The adult daughter was there and said "You are like an angel! My mom just said that she wished she could make cookies, but she can't do anything with her arm. She JUST got done saying that and you rang the doorbell with cookies! I have chills!" I have chills typing this! I smiled and said "Well, I guess that's why I felt that I should come give you cookies!" The mom came over and gave me a HUG! As I was hugging her back, I was filled with awe that this was happening.

I couldn't help but smile as I walked back over to our house. I thanked God for being so awesome. I was thankful that the one batch of oatmeal cookies had made far more than I had imagined. I had actually split the oatmeal cookie dough in half and made half with raisins and half with chocolate chips. Each type made close to 4 dozen cookies! I hadn't doubled the recipe, but God must have multiplied the dough! I was thankful that I had listened to that feeling about giving the neighbors some cookies. I was thankful I didn't dismiss the thought or delayed in bringing them the cookies. I went at the exact time God wanted me to, and it made a huge impact on our neighbors...and on me! I'm not often called "an angel", but it was an awesome experience to know that God used my homemade cookies (which just so happened to be my grandma's recipe, who is singing with the angels now) to further mend the rift between our neighbors and us.

What Are You Wearing?

2010-12-07T22:11:00.000-05:00

Colossians 3:12 says, "Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience." When I read that verse, I thought of what it means to clothe yourself. It means you are putting something on that everyone who looks at you will see. I then looked back at the verse to take another look at what God thinks is important for others to see when they look at us. God wants others to see compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience when they look at us.

What I see in all those character traits is that we are to be thinking of other people before ourselves. We are to be putting their needs before our own. We are to show them how much we care about them because by doing that, we will be showing them how much God cares about them. That is why I believe God wants us to be clothing ourselves with these traits. He wants everyone who looks at us to see that we genuinely have a love and concern for others. The way we treat others will either point them to or away from Him.

For me, I know that it is not easy to be showing patience or humility all the time. I'm sure everyone who may read this blog could say the same thing about at least one of these traits. It may not be the same ones that I struggle with, but I am certain that each person has something that they find hard to do. We are human, and thankfully God knows we are not perfect. We won't be able to do this on our own. It is something we truly need to daily ask God to help us do.

What do people see when they look at you? What are you wearing? What have you clothed yourself in? This verse has really given me something to strive for. I truly want others to see in me the things God wants them to see. I am determined to do my best to clothe myself with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. I want to point others toward God and not away from Him.

God Means What He Says

2010-11-18T22:04:00.001-05:00

Hebrews 13: 5-6 says "Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, 'Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.' So we say with confidence, 'The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can mere mortals do to me?'"

When I read that this morning, I thought of how hard it can be to be content with what you have when you are struggling financially. It's easy to think of things you need or want but can't afford to buy. It's even harder to be content when unexpected bills pop up. Just because I am a Christian does not mean I don't worry about money just like so many others do. There are times I am able to say "We'll be ok. God's in control." and not worry about the situation. There are other times I feel almost overwhelmed with fear over how in the world we are going to pay our bills.

Over the last month and a half, I worried about the damage the leaky roof was causing. I worried about whether mold would form on the walls and floor. I worried about it causing damage to the floor and walls, as well as the ceiling of the floor below. Every time it rained, I felt sick to my stomach from worrying about how much rain would come in and whether the buckets would catch it all. I worried about how paying for it would cause us to possibly not have enough money to pay other bills in the coming months. Even though the price we wound up paying was a great price, it was still a lot of money for us. Yet, in spite of all my worries, I kept trying to give it all over to the Lord. I knew He understood my worries, and I saw how He answered our prayers.

It might be easy for some people to think that God abandoned us. They may say, "If God knew how bad your finances are, why would He allow your roof to leak and cause you to pay a large amount of money that you really needed?" To that I say God uses ALL things for good. Could He have prevented our roof from leaking? Yes. Could He have provided a way for us to get the roof fixed without paying anything? Yes. I know it could have been very possible that someone could have stepped forward and gave us the full amount of money needed to pay for the roof repair, but I'm glad that's not the way it happened.

I can almost hear people saying "What?!" As a result of all this happening, I learned SO much about trusting God when things seem worse. He spoke to me through my devotions and constantly reassured me that He was there. I learned anew that God really does mean it when He says "Never will I leave you. Never will I forsake you." He was there whenever I prayed for the rain to stop. He was there when it was raining and I started to worry. I would pray and feel His presence, and peace would start to replace the worry. I can say with confidence that the Lord is my helper. He helped alleviate my fears by providing a lot of sunny days. There were times when it did rain, but the roof didn't leak at all. There were days it was suppose to rain, but it didn't rain in our town. I saw how much God loved and cared about us through all of this, so I can say with confidence that I do not need to be afraid.

God's Perfect Timing

2010-11-15T22:41:00.000-05:00

For those of you who have been following our leaky roof situation for the last month and a half, you will be very happy to read this blog! The roofer showed up today!! Yes, the same roofer we had originally called at the beginning of October. The same roofer who didn't return any of my calls that I had left for him. He didn't call so we had no idea he was coming. He simply showed up ready to work on the roof! He wanted to beat the rain that they are calling for us to get tomorrow. I'm truly hoping that we won't be seeing any water in those buckets up in the attic when we get rain!

The fact that the roofer showed up today is amazing to me for a few reasons. One is that we had contacted another roofer, who had showed up last Monday and then called us with an estimate. The amount he quoted us to fix just ONE window was the amount our original roofer had quoted us to do BOTH windows. We knew we could have chosen to just do the window that was leaking, but we knew we'd be constantly wondering when the other window was going to start to leak. The other window was the one that had been leaking a few years ago and was the reason we had the whole roof redone. It hadn't leaked since the roof was fixed, but then the other window started to leak. We just felt it would be best to have both windows removed so we didn't need to worry about it. We chose to wait a little while and not go with that roofer, and the weather was beautiful all last week!

The day after we declined to go with the second roofer, the friend from church who had referred us to that roofer let me know that his brother is a contractor/roofer. His brother was suppose to come Monday or Tuesday and he would probably be able to give us a better quote than the other roofer. I had just sent a note to our friend with directions to our house so his brother would know how to get to our house when he showed up. Minutes later, I had to send him another note letting him know our roofer just showed up. The man's brother didn't come today, but we were able to let our friend know that we would still like him to come over since we will need drywall put up in the spaces where the skylights were so the walls are smooth. Even if we can't afford to do it right now, we would be able to find out what exactly needs to be done and we'd have an estimate of what it will cost to do it. We also will have a contractor who we know we can call to do the work!

God's timing was perfect! We didn't hire the other roofer to do just one window instead of two. It didn't rain today so the roofer was able to get both skylights removed and the roof repaired. The amount we paid was exactly the amount I had told God I wanted to pay. This roofer had quoted us $700 to do both windows. I prayed and told God I only wanted to pay $500. A couple at church gave us $200 just 3 days after I prayed that. $700 - $200 = $500! The contractor/roofer did not show up today, which may have been awkward since our roofer was here. We won't be home all day tomorrow so if he comes early enough, we'll be able to talk with him about what needs to be done and what he thinks it will cost. If we don't get to see him tomorrow, we know how to get in touch with him. Best of all, it is suppose to rain tomorrow. For the first time in a month and a half, I do not feel any anxiety about that. God is good! All the time!! And His timing is PERFECT!!

God is Listening!

2010-11-07T13:44:00.000-05:00

Last Sunday, my husband and I were talking with a man at church. He asked if we had gotten our roof fixed yet and mentioned the name of a roofer, but I didn't think much of it at the time since we had a roofer who was suppose to be fixing our roof...even though we hadn't heard much from him and it had been almost a month since we initially contacted him about the leak in our roof and wanting to get both skylights removed and the roof fixed. On Thursday morning, I was doing school with the kids and I suddenly felt very strongly that I was suppose to call this other roofer. I sent a message via Facebook to the man we had talked to the previous Sunday asking him if he could give me the name and the phone number if he had it. Within minutes, the man responded back and said it was "funny" that I had just asked that because he had just called the guy about 10 minutes ago. He gave me the guy's name and phone number and I thanked him.

I waited until my husband came home from work because I didn't want to call another roofer without talking to him first to see if he agreed to it. He said it was fine so I called and left a message for the roofer. The next day, I received a phone call from the company and was told that the roofer was away this week; but he would be back on Sunday and would call me on Monday. It felt amazing to me to actually receive a phone call letting me know that "we got your message and we'll get back to you." since I haven't had that with our current roofer.

On my way to worship team rehearsal on Thursday night, I felt that I needed to pray to God and claim the price that I wanted to pay for our roof repair. A price came to my mind that was what we originally were hoping for, but our roofer quoted us something $200 higher than that. We had said ok, but we knew it was going to be a stretch for us. Now a month later, the roof had still not been fixed, but I knew God had been faithful in protecting our house. We had been praying every night that either the roofer would call or that God would "put an umbrella over the roof". When my husband first said those words, the kids laughed. We explained that we wanted God to protect our roof however he saw fit. Many of the days in the last month were sunny. There were days it was suppose to rain, but it never did. There were days it rained lightly and no rain came in. There were days it rained and the roof did leak, but it wasn't as bad as it had been. No matter what the weather, we knew God was protecting our house and watching over the leak in the roof. So now I decided to claim the price I originally was hoping for even though in my mind I felt our roofer had probably given us a price lower than any other roofer we would call and it would be impossible to get a lower price. As soon as the thought "impossible" popped into my mind, I thought "NOTHING is impossible with God!" Then I said "Lord, I want to spend $____ to get this roof fixed. I know it seems impossible, but I know nothing is impossible with you. You can do this, Lord! I trust you!"

Even though I didn't get to talk to the roofer the next day, I knew that I would be talking to him soon. I knew in my heart that God was in control. We went to church today and afterward, a couple came up to us. I had spoken with them about two weeks prior because they had heard about our roof situation. We talked for awhile because they totally understood what we were going through since they too had a leak in their roof a few years ago and had a lot of trouble finding a roofer. They prayed with me and I went home. Today at church, they came up to us and handed us an envelop. They said they felt God told them to give it to us and had blessed them with it so they could bless us. Inside was the EXACT amount of the difference between what our roofer quoted us to fix the roof and the price I claimed to God on Thursday that I wanted to pay!!! As soon as I saw the amount, I felt God saying to me, "I'm listening!"

I don't know what is going to happen when I talk to this other roofer tomorrow. I don't know when he'll be able to give us a quote. I do know if it is the same amount as what we were expecting or less, than we will have a new roofer! If he quotes a higher price, then maybe the amount given to us today will cover that difference and we will be able to hire him. If his quote is too high, then we'll just continue to wait for God to lead and direct us. I have a peace in my heart though because I know God is listening. He knows we've been patient and kept trusting Him to protect the roof and our house, and He has been faithful to do that. He knows the price we can afford, as well as what we can't afford. He knows what price I claimed in faith is what I want to pay and I truly believe that it is not impossible for Him to make that happen.

God is listening when we pray! He hears us! He knows what we need before we even ask, but He wants us to ask anyway. He wants us to show Him that we trust Him. He wants us to give everything over to Him and then just watch what happens and how He works through it all. I am truly looking forward to seeing what happens this week! God has been listening to my prayers for the last month and I think I'm about ready to experience His answer in a big way!

The Lord is Near

2010-11-03T07:54:00.000-04:00

This morning I read just one verse - Philippians 4:5. That's all I needed to read. God spoke to me in a huge way, and it was not pleasant! I am so thankful for His forgiveness, because I needed it this morning!

Philippians 4:5 says, "Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near." The first part of the verse spoke to me immediately because I had a very frustrating day doing school with the kids yesterday. I knew my gentleness would NOT have been evident to all. I thought of my two kids and knew that they certainly didn't see my gentleness! I asked for forgiveness for that and prayed for the Lord to help me be gentle ALL the time, even when I have a reason for feeling frustrated or angry. I may have a perfectly good reason for having those feelings, but I still need to be gentle with my words.

When I first read the second part of the verse, I thought "The Lord is near." was referring to His second coming. I thought of how if His coming was near when this was written, how much closer it is now! Then the Lord gently said to me, "No, I am near." That's when it hit me. The Lord was near when I was not displaying gentleness to my kids yesterday. He saw and heard everything. OUCH! How I must have saddened and disappointed Him. There are times I feel the Lord's presence and I am so thankful He is there. There are other times it seems I "forget" that He is always there. He is always in the same room with me. He is with me wherever I go. I realized how much I need to think before I speak. I need to stop and ask Him for His help. He is right there with me and I don't ever want Him to have to see and hear me acting in a way that displeases Him. So, I apologized and asked for His forgiveness again.

Yes, I am thankful for the Lord's forgiveness today because I needed it...twice! He understands that I am not perfect and I will make mistakes. He understands that I will feel frustrated or even angry, and He understands why I am frustrated or angry. I need to remember that whenever I feel myself getting frustrated or angry, I need to ask for His help. I am thankful that He is always ready and willing to forgive me when I ask Him to. I am thankful that He is always near to me. I need to keep that in mind though ALL the time!

I felt I needed to share this today. Maybe you have the same problem I do with not always being gentle with your words, especially when you are frustrated or angry. The Lord wants us to let our gentleness be evident to all. That isn't always going to be easy, but I know God will help all of us do it if we simply ask for His help. Maybe you needed to be reminded that the Lord is near. I know sometimes it may seem that He isn't there, but He has promised us that He is always with us. He will never leave us. Trust that He is there even when you don't feel Him. Perhaps you needed to be reminded of both of these things, the same way I did. Just ask for His forgiveness, and be thankful that He is there and ready to forgive you. Be thankful that He is near to you all the time, and use that reminder to help give you the strength to display gentleness even when it isn't easy.

Rejoice in the Lord...always?!

2010-11-01T17:56:00.003-04:00

As a mom, I've done my fair share of having to repeat something I just said. The main reason for me having to repeat myself is the simple fact that my kids weren't listening the first time I said it. Sometimes they didn't hear it because they were so busy being loud that they simply couldn't hear me talking. Other times, it is due to them tuning me out. I can usually tell by the expression on their face or the fact that I can see them looking around or doing something else as I'm talking that I'm being ignored. Regardless of the reason behind it, I find myself often repeating something that I find to be important and I want to make sure my kids heard.

I thought of this today as I read Philippians 4:4 which says, "Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!" Paul was writing a letter and he told the people to Rejoice in the Lord ALWAYS. I emphasized that last word because I know that it can be very hard to rejoice in the Lord in each and every situation. I'm sure Paul knew that sentence was read, people would probably be thinking "Is he serious?! Does he really expect me to rejoice all the time, even when something really bad happens?!" I think Paul knew those kinds of questions would arise, so he immediately repeated himself so that the people knew what he had just said was important. He wanted to make sure they heard what he was saying.

When I read that verse today, I knew that rejoicing in the Lord always must be important if Paul felt that he needed to repeat himself and say it twice. I then started to think about times when it is not always easy to rejoice, and then think of how I could possibly find a way to rejoice even when it might seem impossible or at least very hard to do so. The first situation I thought of was when someone dies. I almost laughed when I thought of how it is not my first thought to yell "Praise the Lord!" when I hear that someone has passed away. I then thought of my sister who died suddenly at the age of 28. Even though this happened sixteen years ago, I remember that day very clearly. I remember that the farthest thing from my mind was rejoicing in the Lord. However, I also remember knowing that she was now in heaven and seeing the babies she had lost. I was sad for all of us that were left behind, but I was comforted in knowing that I would see her again one day. In a way, I was "rejoicing" that she had lived her life in such a way that she had heard "Well done thou good and faithful servant. Enter in to the joy of the Lord." and that one day, all of us who had given our heart to the Lord would see her again. When someone is sick for a long time, people may breathe a "Thank you, Lord" when the person finally passes away because they know that person is no longer in any pain. It is a lot harder to find the "good" in a situation when it comes so unexpectedly, but God wants us to rejoice even if it is to say "Lord, I don't understand why you allowed this to happen, but I know that you are in control. Thank you for the promise that you will comfort us during this difficult time. Thank you for loving me and being with me every step of the way. I know I will make it through this with your help." If you know the person who passed away is a Christian, you can thank the Lord that person is in God's presence. You can thank the Lord for the privilege of knowing that person. You can thank Him for the blessing they may have been in your life. Focus on all the positives of that person's life and you will find yourself rejoicing in the fact that God had placed that person in your life and you will never forget them.

I know it won't always be easy to rejoice in the Lord, but I am sure that you can find SOMETHING to say "Thank you" to the Lord for in EVERY situation. It may be that you can rejoice you are still alive. It may be that you can rejoice the bill wasn't more than it was. If you can't think of something specific, just rejoice that God is in control and has promised to never leave you or forsake you. Rejoice in the Lord always! I will say it again: Rejoice!

Are You Strong?

2010-10-28T13:56:00.002-04:00

Today, the verse that stood out to me during my devotions was Ephesians 6:10 which says, "Finally, be strong in the Lord and in His mighty power." I am not a strong person...not physically anyway. I guess that's why I like this verse so much. It's a great reminder of HOW I can be strong. It doesn't matter what comes my way, I can be strong IN THE LORD. When I am faced with a crisis or situation that I feel I can't handle, I can give it to the Lord. By admitting I can't do something, you may be thinking that I'm just admitting that I'm weak. You are right, and that's exactly what God wants and needs us to do! To be truly strong in the Lord means we have to admit we are weak so that we can see how strong God can make us. He will give us what we need to handle everything that comes our way.

Rely on God to Meet Your Needs

2010-10-26T09:16:00.006-04:00

This morning, I read John 15:1-8 in my devotions. It is the passage where Jesus is saying He is the vine and we are the branches. Verse 4 includes the words "No branch can bear fruit by itself." At the end of verse 5, I read these words "apart from me you can do nothing." I will admit that the first thought that popped into my head as I was reading those words in those two verses was "What about these people who aren't Christians, but they never have to worry about money. That doesn't seem like they have done nothing to me!" I was almost shocked by that thought coming to my mind, but I realized that it has been very hard financially and all the things that have gone wrong with our house lately have just amplified our financial worries.

Then I read verse 7 : "If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you." I immediately heard God's quiet words saying "Yes, there are non-Christians who are successful and don't have to worry so much about money; but they don't know that they can come and talk directly to me about anything. You know that you can ask me anything, and I WILL do it. I know what you need. I want to give it to you. Just ask." Just writing those words right now brought tears to my eyes again. I have a God whose resources are limitless. Why would I put Him in a box and think that He can't help me with something?

Yes, we chose for me to be a stay-at-home mom. Yes, it can be very hard to make ends meet financially because of that choice. Does God care that we have financial difficulties as a result of that decision? YES! I fully believe HE led us to make the decision for me to stay at home. He has been faithful over the last 11 years to supply our needs. Yes, it has been hard and we have done without some things over the years, but God has always been there to help us pay our bills on time and meet other needs we may have had. Were those needs always met in our timing? No.

We were a one car family for two years. It was hard, but we were able to make it work. God eventually rewarded us for being faithful and trusting Him and provided us with a car....for FREE! Our church had a Family Fun Day and one of the things there was a raffle for a used car that a church member had donated. A couple of ladies from the church knew we only had one car, so they decided to buy some raffle tickets because they had decided they would give us the car if they won. When I heard about it, I cried because I was so touched that they would have even thought to do something like that. The next morning at church, one of the ladies walked up to me and asked "I won the car. Would you like it? I want to give it to you." I could barely speak. I think I said "Are you sure?" and she said yes. So I nodded yes, and then had to go up on stage to sing since I was on worship team that morning. One of my friends who I sing with saw my face and asked if I was OK. I told her what had just happened and she hugged me and we both cried at how God had provided for my family. God met our needs in a way we never would have expected.

That's just one way God has met our needs. So again I need to ask myself, "Why do I try to handle things on my own? Do I think God can't meet me needs? Do I think He doesn't care about even the smallest details of my life, even though He has proven time and time again that He does care about everything that happens to me?" Yes, God does care. Yes, we need to be dependent on Him because He wants to meet our needs. We just need to bring those needs and requests to Him, and then believe that He will answer us. Don't put God in a box! He can handle anything you bring to Him. Don't try to limit Him by thinking He can't or won't help you!

Needed: Attitude Adjustment

2010-10-22T14:00:00.002-04:00

This morning the verse that jumped out at me while I was reading my devotions was Philippians 2:5. It says, "Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus." When I read that this morning, I simply said "OUCH!" Is my attitude always the same as Jesus'? No! It can be very easy to come up with "reasons" that seem to "justify" why my attitude was not what it should have been; but when you come right down to it, there is simply no excuse why I allow my attitude to not be the same as what Christ would have had in that same situation.

I know God is working on my attitude. It is HARD to homeschool or cyber school as I do. I have an extremely strong-willed child who simply does not want to listen to what I say. She wants to do things HER way, even if that means doing school for 12 hours and redoing an assignment two or even three times. On those long, stress-filled days, do I display an attitude that Jesus would? Sadly, my answer has to be no. To anyone else, I could say "Hey! I'm human!" or "She didn't listen to me so she deserved to be punished!". As true as both of those "excuses" are, the fact remains that my attitude at the time should be the same as that of Christ's. He would have shown LOVE first. Yes, it does say in the Bible to "spare the rod and spoil the child" so I do believe in spanking or disciplining when my children disobey and I do not believe there is anything wrong with that. My attitude, however, is what needs to be correct before AND during the issuing of any form of discipline.

I really needed this verse this morning because just an hour later, my daughter needed some correcting. She shot a rubber band at her brother, but it missed him and came within millimeters of hitting me in the face. I knew she was in the kitchen and that the rubber band had come from that area, so I simply said "Sarah, what are you doing?!" Her reply, "I'm washing the dishes". Yes, she is VERY good at finding a way of answering in such a way that it technically is the truth, but she also knows exactly what I am asking and chooses to "lie" by not giving the answer she knows I want. I called her on it and she finally admitted that she had shot the rubber band because her brother had shot one at her first. She started to get defensive like she always does during our conversation and this verse popped into my mind. I was able to remember the reference and verse verbatim (something I can't usually do!) so I told her what I read and then simply asked "Is your attitude the same as that of Jesus? Would Jesus act the way you are?" She lowered her head and simply said "No." WOW! I think this verse is definitely going to be a key verse for us in the next few weeks and months. I'm going to write it on an index card and stick it to the wall next to where she does school. Whenever her attitude starts to turn ugly, I'll simply ask her to read the verse and then ask "Is your attitude the same as that of Jesus? Would He act the way you are?" It will also be a great reminder for ME as well.

Are you in need of an attitude adjustment as well? Maybe you have a child who needs one as well. I think this would be a GREAT verse for both of you to memorize and meditate on. I know it won't be easy, but I know God wants us to have the same attitude as that of Jesus. I also know that He will give us all the strength we need to adjust our attitudes so that they do become the same as His.

Do I Make God Proud?

2010-10-21T11:39:00.000-04:00

Philippians 1:27a says, "Whatever happens, conduct yourselves in a manner worthy of the gospel of Christ." My first thought when I read that this morning was "WOW! That is NOT easy to do all the time!" First, I thought of times when I am frustrated with the kids for disobeying me for the millionth time. Do I respond in a way that makes God proud? What about when the neighbor is doing stuff just to tick us off? Are our actions and/or words making God proud? Does the way I respond in every situation point people to God? Do I make others want to know God and have a personal relationship with him, or am I turning them away from Him because of how I handle myself when things are going badly? It's easier to conduct ourselves in a manner that makes God proud when things are going smoothly for us, but I want to make Him proud ALL the time! I have a wonderful earthly father, and I know it makes ME feel proud when I know I made him proud. How much more should I want to make my heavenly Father proud?! That is what I want to strive for! I want to make God proud in each and every situation. I want to conduct myself in a manner worthy of Him, and in a way that gives Christians a good name! Are you making God proud?

God is Good...ALL the Time

2010-10-08T19:28:00.001-04:00

I almost had to laugh when the title I chose for this note popped into my head, but it fits so well in spite of all we are going through right now that I just had to use it. I'm sure God is the one who put that "title" in my head anyway, so I might as well listen to Him since He's been talking to me a lot lately through the scriptures.

I almost have to start this from a few months ago. We had had a lot of rain during the day and into the night. When my husband woke up at 2:00 am to get ready for work, he discovered his work clothes that hang in the bathroom closet were all wet. He realized that we must have a leak in our roof, which we were definitely NOT expecting since we had put a new roof on our house just a few years ago. We put plastic down on the floor and placed buckets where the water was coming in at. The man who had done our roof came over and told us he strongly suspected the leak was coming from the one skylight (we have two, one on each side of the roof). Oddly enough, it was the skylight on the other side of the roof that caused us to put a new roof on! He put more caulk around the window, but he said he wasn't sure if that would help. He said if it continued to leak, we'd either need to replace the skylights with better ones or just have them removed and fix the roof. We discovered a few weeks later that the roof was indeed still leaking, but it wasn't leaking very much and sometimes it wouldn't leak at all so we decided to wait until we were in a better place financially to do something.

Last Thursday and Friday, we had a tremendous amount of rain so I continued to run up to the attic to check whether the situation. The roof was definitely leaking so I just kept an eye on whether I felt the bucket needed to be emptied. I dumped about an inch of water from the bucket around 11 am. My husband checked on it at around 7 pm and said there wasn't much water in it (probably about an inch), but the bucket held a gallon and figured it would be fine through the night. He was wrong. Sometime after he left for work and before 5:30 am when I woke up, the box which the bucket was sitting on either gave way from the weight of the bucket or became soaked as water started to spill out of the bucket and then partially collapsed. In any case, enough water came out of the bucket that it made its way down to the bathroom ceiling and came through all over the floor. When I awoke at 5:30 am, I had no idea why I was standing in water when I walked into the bathroom. My daughter came in and simply said "The ceiling is leaking." I immediately RAN up the stairs and into the attic and was horrified to see the box soaked through, partially collapsed in the center, and the bucket leaning precariously to the one side. I grabbed the bucket and saw it was FULL. I realized how much worse it could have been had the bucket completely fallen over and all that water had spilled out. Yes, God is good....all the time! I took the bucket down and dumped the water out of it. Then I went back upstairs and cleaned up the water that was all over the plastic...totally soaking quite a few towels and other rags in the process. My daughter brought me another box and I set that up as good as I could to try and catch any more water that came in. Then I went downstairs to clean up the bathroom floor. Finally, I called my husband at work and told him we had a problem!

I called the roofer and was thankful that the rain had finally slowed down. On Tuesday, I left another message for the roofer because he still hadn't called back. That same day, it rained again and we noticed the one wall in Micah's room (which is on the third floor and technically part of the attic) was now wet below and beside the skylight. As the rain continued to come down and my husband was upstairs trying to figure out if there was anything at all we could do, I told the kids we needed to pray for the rain to stop. Micah, who is only 6 years old, said "Mommy? I didn't pray for that. I prayed that God would do a miracle and that our roof would stop leaking." I had to fight back tears at the faith in my little boy and realized I must be doing something right! I told him that was good, but I still wanted us to all pray for the rain to stop. Micah and Sarah both prayed, and then I prayed. As the kids ate dinner, I went on Facebook and asked my friends via my status line to please pray for the rain to stop. Within MINUTES, the rain stopped and the SUN came out! Later, my daughter yelled down that there was a rainbow in the sky. I didn't need to see it. I knew it was there as soon as I saw the sun come out. I knew God was reminding me that He keeps His promises and He was in control. Of course, Satan didn't like that very much and caused me to start worrying later that night because it was suppose to rain all night. I laid awake and literally felt sick to my stomach with worry. I just kept praying for God to intervene. It didn't rain until almost morning. Yes, God is good...all the time!

Wednesday morning, I woke up with the following verse in mind: Philippians 4:19 says "My God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus." I noticed it said WILL meet, not might meet. It says ALL your needs, not some of them. I claimed that verse as my own. Later that day, the roofer finally called. He said he'd have to think about what estimate he would quote us and would call us back. I was worried about how long it would take for him to get back to us with a quote on what it would cost to fix our roof, so I checked the weather report and saw no rain was in the forecast until Tuesday. Yes, God is good...all the time!

Yesterday morning, I was doing devotions and read the following verse: Deuteronomy 31:8 says "The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged." I was so thankful that God was again reminding me that He was with us. He knew what we were going through. He knows about our finances. All I need to do is trust Him and not be afraid because He will be there to help us through this. Yes, God is good....all the time!

I thought about writing a note last night, but I wasn't sure what all I wanted to say or if anyone really would want to read it. God made it perfectly clear this morning that He did indeed want me to share what He was teaching me. My devotions today were to read John 14:1-6, but it was verse 1 that stood out to me. It was Jesus' own words: "Do not let your heart be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me." I know many people think God and Jesus don't exist, they are a myth, or a fairy tale. Well, I know that they are wrong! I do not have any doubt that God does exist! I also know that He speaks to us and gives us exactly what we need when we need it. I don't think these verses I've been reading the last three days are just a coincidence. I know God has been sending them my way to comfort me and remind me to just keep trusting Him. We still are waiting on the roofer to call back and give us an estimate as to what it will cost to remove the skylights and fix the roof, but I know that God is in control. In spite of all the reasons I have to be fearful and worry, I know that YES! God is good....ALL the time!

RUN the Race

2010-01-21T20:56:00.001-05:00

I have never been much of an athlete. Sports have never really interested me, probably because I wasn't good at any of them! I do enjoy watching certain sports, and I love watching the Olympics. I know that people who run in a race, whether it be a sprint or a marathon or any distance in between, dress as lightly as possible. They don't want to be weighed down by heavy clothes because that would prevent them from running as fast as they could. In longer races, a runner who chose to wear bulky/heavy clothes would not have a chance of winning, and they very possibly would not even be able to finish the race because they would be too exhausted and/or overheated.

The Christian walk is often referred to as a race in the Bible, with the finish line being heaven. I did a search online for the word "race" in the NIV Bible and specifically looked for verses where the word was used to describe how we "run the race" or "finish the race" and found 6 references (Acts 20:24, I Corinthians 9:24, Galatians 2:2, Galatians 5:7, 2 Timothy 4:7, and Hebrews 12:1). For most of us, the race of life would be more of a marathon that a sprint, so it is very important that we are not being slowed down by carrying along things that weigh us down.

The other day I read the following verse: Philippians 3:13b -14 says "Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." When I read this verse, I was reminded of how easy it is to focus on things that have happened in our past. It doesn't matter whether it is something that happened to us or whether it is something we did, we can allow ourselves to be weighed down by our past. If we are running this race called life, why would we risk not being able to reach the finish line....heaven?!

If you are holding onto things that have happened to you in your past, it is time to turn those things over to God and throw off those chains that are weighing you down! If you are focusing on things you did wrong in the past, ask God to forgive you of those things and then let it go! When you ask God for forgiveness, He forgives and FORGETS all of the things you did worng. It doesn't matter how big or small those things are. You don't need to keep worrying and being weighed down by chains that God Himself removed from you. Instead of slowly dragging yourself through life because you are weighed down by all this junk, get rid of it so you can RUN to the finish line!

I think those verses in Philippians can be paraphrased like this: "Forget about all the stuff that is in your past! Turn it all over to God and keep moving forward no matter what. When you reach the finish line, you'll receive the best prize of all...eternal life in HEAVEN!"

God said it so BELIEVE it

2009-12-29T09:24:00.001-05:00

In Hebrews 13:5, you find these words: Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you."

Since I'm a stay-at-home mom and my husband's one job is our only source of income, our finances are definitely not where we want/need them to be. It has been a real struggle at times to make ends meet. I almost had to laugh when I read "keep your lives free from the love of money" because for us it sometimes seems like we've kept our lives "free from money". LOL! It sure can be hard to be content with what you have, especially when you know that you need something but you can't afford it. We currently have just one vehicle, and that one probably isn't going to last much longer since it has over 130,000 miles on it and has been definitely showing signs of its age. I have seen though how the Lord has been faithful in meeting our needs. He always seems to provide for us when we need it most; and I truly believe that's because we've been faithful in praying about what we need and then doing our best to leave it in His hands and not worry about it. I'm not saying we never worry about finances because we do. My husband seems to worry about it more than I do, but I know that's because he wants to make sure he is taking care of his family and being a good provider. I'm so lucky to have him as my husband! When it's time for me to pay the bills, I often pray over the checkbook because I can see exactly where we're at and it can be scary! I don't want to give satan that foothold so I simply say something along the lines of "Lord, you know exactly what we need. You know we don't have much money left so I pray that you will continue to provide what we need. Thank you!"

Hebrews 13: 6 says the following: So we say with confidence, "The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?"

I love the fact that it says we can say WITH CONIFIDENCE that the Lord is my helper! We don't need to be afraid of what may come our way. We KNOW that the Lord is WITH us! He KNOW He will NEVER LEAVE us! Since we know God never lies and always keeps His word, we know He will always do what He says He will do. Therefore, we can be certain that He will always be there to help us and we don't have any reason to be afraid! PRAISE THE LORD!!

Our God is an Awesome God

2009-08-25T07:36:00.002-04:00

On Sunday morning, my husband Bob started our one remaining vehicle and we immediately heard a loud noise. We looked at each other and I asked "muffler?". Bob said he didn't know and then promptly asked "What did you do to it?" I was taken aback and said excuse me?! For those of you who don't know, this was the car (SUV) that I drove all the time, but he's been the one driving it for the last month since his car was the one who died. Anyway, in response to me wondering why in the world he was blaming ME for doing something to the car, he said "well you were the last person to drive it!" Well, I was VERY amused by that comment and smiled as I pointed out "YOU were the last person to drive it!" He looked at me with a questioning look, so I smugly pointed out that I had driven the car to worship team rehearsal on Thursday night...but HE drove the car to work on Friday! His face registered defeat and he muttered "well it wasn't making that noise when I parked it." LOL! Aren't husbands wonderful?

As we drove to church, Bob thought it could also be the catalytic converter...which he knew would cost us at least $200 to replace. With finances as tight as they are, we were both hoping Bob could be able to fix the car quickly and easily without costing us too much money! To top it all off, the car needed to be inspected this month and even though I had reminded my wonderful husband over 2 weeks ago to call and get an appointment, he "forgot" so he HAD to call and schedule an appointment to get the inspection done THIS WEEK. He pointed out that he wasn't going to be able to get the car inspected now until he got the car fixed, but I encouraged him to call on Monday and schedule the appointment anyway to assure that he could get in if indeed he fixed the car. Of course, I did tease him that if he had listened to me, the car would already have been inspected by now and he wouldn't have had to worry about that. LOL! When we got home, he checked the car and determined that it wasn't the catalytic converter (YEAH!) nor was it the muffler. A clamp that was holding 2 pipes together had rusted and the pipes were moving. The pipes were also quite rusted, so he knew he was probably going to have to buy them too.

He came home from work yesterday and the first thing he did was call to schedule an appointment to get the car inspected. His appointment was scheduled for the next day, so he knew he HAD to get the car fixed today (which was actually yesterday). Someone had told him that he would have to take the pipe off before he bought the parts because there is a part inside the pipes that may have gone bad as well. We were worried that if he took it apart, he wouldn't be able to get it back together because the bolts and stuff that had held the clamp had also rusted badly and he was afaid they were going to break when he tried to take them out. With no other car to use, we would need to find someone to run him to the place to buy the parts if he couldn't get it back together.

He was outside working on it for awhile and I suddenly decided that I needed to start praying about the situation. I prayed that he'd be able to get the car fixed, that he'd be able to get the pipes put back together to be able to drive and get the parts or that we'd be able to find someone who could be willing to drive him there, that God would give Bob the knowledge to fix the car and that he'd be able to remain calm and not get frustrated, and finally I prayed that the parts would cost under $100. I know car parts can be expensive and I knew Bob was going to need quite a few things. I felt that I needed to state the price that I wanted the cost to be under. I just kept hearing "ASK ME!" so I prayed earnestly for EXACTLY what I wanted God to do. I then called the kids down so we could all pray for daddy together. I told them what we needed to pray for and they each said a prayer, and then I prayed with my kids pretty much the same prayer I had already prayed alone. Seconds after we prayed, Bob came in and I asked him if he was going to be able to drive the car to get the parts. He said he didn't think so, but he didn't know who to call. He doesn't like making phone calls in the first place, and he also doesn't like asking for help; so you can imagine that this wasn't something he wanted to do. I told him I'd call my dad for him. I made the call and said a quick prayer that dad would be home. Dad answered the phone as soon as I finished my silent prayer and he said he'd be right over! I love my dad!

They didn't have one of the parts (the flange on the end of the pipe), but he was able to buy everything else. He put everything on the car quickly. For now, he just put the old flange back on and put some sealant around the connection. It is much quieter so he should be able to get the car inspected today and hopefully it will pass. I think the guy will pass it if he knows Bob is going to pick up the part afterwards and put it on. If not, I'm sure he'll allow him to come back another day this week and pass it then. I asked my husband how much everything cost and it was under $30 (that includes the cost of the flange that they had to order in for him). God answered everything I asked of him, and the cost was WAY below the price that I claimed and believed the parts would be under! Our God is an awesome God!!

We Have To Ask First Before God Can Act

2009-05-04T10:15:00.002-04:00

Our church goes to Rehoboth Beach in Delaware every year for a Ladies' Retreat. Last year was my first year attending one of these retreats, and there were about 60 women who went. That was a record since it use to be only 30 or 40. This year, there were a total of 83 women who attended, and half of them were women who don't attend our church! The retreat this year was May 1-3 so I just returned last night from the retreat.

The theme this year was summarized in one word: Heart. We learned that we need ask God EVERY DAY to open our spiritual eyes so that we can see what He wants us to see, learn what He wants us to learn, and do what He wants us to do. I learned a lot and am eager to start putting into practice what God taught me while I was there. I am really excited about one thing in particular that God taught me and that is what I want to share today.

On Saturday morning, the pastor's wife was speaking and she said "We need to act first before God can act." She continued to say that sometimes we may pray about something in the morning or evening, but then we don't ask God for it when we really need to. I immediately realized this was exactly what I was doing! As most of you know, I've been using a cyberschool to homeschool my daughter and I have really been struggling with controlling my tongue. When she ignores me or talks back to me, I often say things I know I shouldn't simply because I'm too frustrated or angry to stop and think first. I've been praying every morning for God to give me patience and help me with this, but God let me know this weekend that I wasn't asking Him for patience at the right moment. I needed to be asking Him for it when I feel myself getting frustrated or angry! God made it so clear to me that what I need to do is stop school immediately and tell Sarah that I need to pray. I then need to pray aloud for God to help ME stay calm because I am starting to feel frustrated. I also should pray for Sarah to listen to me as I speak so that I don't continue to feel frustrated. I can also ask Sarah to pray for God to help her listen. It seems so easy, yet I hadn't ever thought to do that before. DUH! I'm thankful God finally taught me this...even though I wish I would have been told about this 2 years ago! LOL!

We broke up into small discussion groups after this session and I decided to share what God had taught me. I knew it was God who led me to share when a few minutes later another woman in the group started to talk and thanked me for sharing what I did because it helped her to see what she should be doing with a little girl she babysits for every day. God is so awesome!!

I don't know what it is that you may be struggling with. You may be like me and ask God daily for Him to help you resist a certain temptation or handle a situation the way He wants you to, but then you fail when you are faced with that temptation or situation. Next time you are faced with that temptation or situation that you are struggling with, stop immediately and pray for God's help! I'm sure He will then give you exactly what you need to help you successfully make it through.

Are You A Fool?

2009-04-30T07:43:00.002-04:00

No one likes to be called a fool or even foolish. I know I sure don't! I guess that's why Proverbs 29: 11 struck me. It says "A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control." OUCH! When I read that, the first thing that entered my mind was "OUCH!" because I realized I do not act like like very wise most of the time when I get really frustrated (or angry). There have been many times when I would be telling myself "you shouldn't be saying this" as the words come to my mind, but I just couldn't seem to stop myself and the words would come flying out my mouth. I do apologize later, but that NEVER makes it right.

Words hurt and you can't take back what you said. I am reminded of an analogy that was used at church to show my kids this very thing. If you take a tube of toothpaste and squeeze the tube, you will see it is very easy to get almost all of the toothpaste out of the tube (yes, they actually had the kids do this! They had a BLAST squeezing all the toothpaste onto a paper plate! LOL!). Now, try to put the toothpaste back into the tube. You should have seen the kids' expressions as they looked at the toothpaste on the plate and tried to use the plastic knife to put the toothpaste back in the tube. They quickly realized it was IMPOSSIBLE...just like it is impossible to take back what you say.

I've decided that I do NOT want to be a fool anymore. I am really going to work hard on ALWAYS keeping my tongue under control so that I don't say things that I shouldn't. I know it isn't going to be easy, but I know that I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me! If you have the same problem as me, I encourage you to make that same decision. With God's help, we CAN do this!!

Upwards

2009-03-17T11:08:00.003-04:00

I enrolled my daughter Sarah in Upwards Cheerleading this year. She loved it! I took my first video using my digital camera last night when she performed a pom routine with her team. I was so proud of her! She dropped her pom at the beginning, scooped it up quickly and kept right on going! She is in the front row, second from the left. Hopefully you can see and hear the video. I apologize now because I did move some near the beginning, but overall I don't think it is too bad of a video...especially for it being my first try doing it! LOL!

God Is Good

2009-03-14T20:27:00.003-04:00

Since it has been over a month since I last wrote on my blog, I figured I should let you all know I'm still around. The Lord continues to be good even though there are times I struggle with why He continues to put up with me. I'm so thankful my Saviour is patient and forgiving! God is good!

This past week I checked an e-mail account that I had totally forgotten about. I was amazed to see an e-mail from someone who did a search for something and one of the posts I had written on my blog came up in her search! Of all the places she could have gone, she chose to come to my blog. The post I had written helped her and she took the time to write an e-mail to me to thank me! She had sent the e-mail to me a month ago and even though I felt bad that so much time had passed, I was thankful it hadn't been 4 months or more like some of the over 250 e-mails I had in my inbox were! I wrote back to her and just have to hope that she reads it because it truly did make my day to know that my blog helped someone. God is good!

I also wrote another song this week! Technically, I guess I wrote 2 even though the one is more of a little ditty than an actual song. I wrote both songs on Thursday, the same day I had already planned on getting together with the worship team leader at my church so we could finish figuring out chords for the first song I wrote. She has heard a little bit of the second song I had written and had mentioned that it sounded like a children's song. Thursday night as we worked on finishing up the chords on my first song, she mentioned that that one too sounded like it could be a children's song and she thinks God may be giving me children's songs. She told me to pray about it to see what God tells me, but she said she had been thinking it would be neat to put together a CD of children's songs so that the kids in the church could have music to listen to that is geared to their level. She has only written 2 songs, so I guess it is possible God has given me a few songs to help bring her dream to fulfillment. Even though I never thought of my first song as being for kids, I know the chorus is very simple and would be easy for kids to pick up. I truly am humbled to think that God may have blessed me with songs for other kids to enjoy, as well as learn Biblical truth from since all 3 of my songs have a Bible verse in them. The little ditty I wrote was just a way for my little boy to learn how to spell Jesus, but God may be giving me some other words for that one as well. I'm keeping my heart and mind open to whatever and however He wants to use me. Yes, God is good!

I'll Never Forget You Grandma!

2009-02-10T15:16:00.005-05:00

Heaven gained another saint today. Jesus finally called my grandma home this morning. Our family knew that she was on heaven's doorstep for the past three weeks, but Jesus kept telling her to wait for some reason. I'm not certain what that reason was, but I'm wondering if it was because just one more person needed to come to know the Lord because of her. Just a few days ago, hospice nurses finally started to show up in an effort to ease the workload of my one aunt especially who was caring for grandma. Two of my aunts were able to share their faith with a few of the nurses who came to the house, and I have to wonder whether one (or more) of those nurses needed to hear about the Lord and that's why grandma had to wait a little longer before she was able to go home. If just one more person came to know the Lord because of grandma, I know she would have agreed that the wait was worth it. My grandma was a woman who had incredible faith, and everyone in my family is a better person because of her. My one cousin asked all of the grandkids to write down a memory we had of grandma. I wrote a lot more than just one, so I decided to put my list here as well so that anyone who may come across my blog and read this post might be able to see what an amazing woman my grandma was!

I remember when I was a child, standing outside waiting for the school bus to come, we all would be freezing in the winter and would be doing whatever it took to try and stay warm. We noticed grandma taking her daily walk, and her coat was WIDE OPEN! She smiled when she saw us and simply replied in her cheerful way "It's a bit nippy out today!"

I remember going sledding with my sisters and grandma came up to visit. We had a round red sled and we asked grandma if she wanted to go sledding with us. She came right over, sat down on the red sled, and down the hill she went yelling "Weeeeeeee!!!!!" all the way down!

I remember grandma always having some freshly baked cookies for us whenever we came to visit. I also remember baking cookies with grandma. Of course, that always included eating some raw cookie dough too!

I remember walking into grandma's house and seeing her on her knees in front of her chair, praying for everyone in the family by name. I know she has left us a wonderful legacy! Grandma had such an incredible faith and love for the Lord that I wanted to be just like her. I know I am no where near the person she was, but I do have a deep faith in the Lord that I am certain is a result of growing up with grandma in my life.

I admire the way she always spoke gently to us when we did something wrong. I don't remember ever hearing her yell because she was mad or angry. I know I can't say the same for me! I pray that the Lord will give me the same gentle spirit that grandma had.

I cherish the time I spent living with her. She was a wonderful Christian woman and was a wonderful listener. She was so very happy for me when I finally met the man I was going to marry. She told me she had been praying for me to meet someone, so I have no doubt Bob came into my life because my grandma prayed! She was indeed an awesome prayer warrior and could pray for great lengths of time. I teased her that God probably brought Bob into my life just so that she would leave Him alone ! LOL!

I know grandma will be greatly missed by many people. I can almost hear her singing with the angels, as only grandma could sing! She is finally with pappy and Wendy again, as well as with other family and friends who went on before her. I know I will see her again one day. Until that time, I will try and live my life in a way that will show others the love I have for my Lord, just like grandma did!

Detours

2009-02-05T18:39:00.002-05:00

I always dread seeing a detour sign for a road I need to take when I'm driving somewhere. Many times I only know one way to get to where I'm going and I don't know the back roads. I have to hope and pray that there are detour signs along the way that point out where I need to go next. If there are no signs because they just assume everyone knows the way, I have to rely on the cars in front of me to guide me. Yes, I PRAY that they know where they are going!

It's the same way in the Christian life. The decisions we make may take us on a detour from the perfect route God has laid out for us, but He knows the way we need to go in order for us to get back to where to He wants all. All we need to do is follow Him! There are definitely times we won't have a clue as to where we are going or where He is taking us, but I know God knows and He will never lead you the wrong way. We just need to trust Him.

I'm not sure why God laid this on my heart this morning, but He brought it to mind again this evening so I knew I was suppose to type it out here. I hope this helps whoever it was meant for!

Oh Be Careful Little Mouth What You Say

2009-01-20T07:42:00.002-05:00

I have been struggling for over a week now with my emotions. My grandma is probably in her last days here in this world. She has lived a good long life and is homesick for heaven. I know she wants to see Jesus as well as pappy and Wendy (my sister) again. I have no doubt when she enters those pearly gates, they'll be standing there right next to Jesus welcoming her to heaven with their arms open wide. I know I have been blessed to have had such a wonderful Christian woman as my grandma. I know this in my HEAD, but it doesn't stop my HEART from breaking. I'm going to miss her so much when she is gone, even though I know she'll be at peace and oh so very happy!

The other day someone was trying to help, but the person's words didn't help. In fact, they kind of hurt because it didn't feel as if they understood at all what I was going through. The person said I should feel happy because I knew grandma was going to heaven. Later I was told by this same person that I should feel blessed that I had my grandma this long because this person had lost their grandma when they were in their 20s. As I've already said, I know in my head that grandma is going to heaven, and I will be happy for her. I know in my head that I am blessed to have had her this long. Does any of that help it to hurt less? Not really. I can't turn off what my heart is feeling.

I have been through 3 miscarriages and there were 2 things that I absolutely HATED to hear: "You can have another one" and "It was God's will." I know now, as a result of going through miscarriages, that I am able to help others who are going through it. I can empathize with them because I've gone through it myself. I eventually did have a child after suffering my first miscarriage, and I had another child after suffering 2 more miscarriages. So even though those things that I hated to hear were true, they weren't what I needed or wanted to hear at that moment in time!

This morning, I was thinking about what happened last week with this person telling me how I should feel about my grandma being in her last days and I thought about writing a letter to this person letting them know how their words had hurt me. I then opened up my Bible and read Matthew 7. The very FIRST verse in that chapter says "Do not judge, or you too will be judged." Tears filled my eyes as I continued to read the first 6 verses in Matthew because I realized God was talking to me, and gently scolding me. He was about to show me something that I hadn't been thinking about. How many times have I said something hurtful to someone? I know I've said stuff when I was upset or angry that I never should have allowed myself to say. I was thinking of removing the speck from another person's eye when I had a plank in my own eye!

The title for my blog came to me very quickly. A few weeks ago, I heard the song "Slow Fade" on the radio and absolutely loved it. It is now the third song on my playlist in case you've never heard the song before or if you just want to listen to it. God reminded me this morning that I really need to be careful and think before I say something. I know I may not always know when something I say was taken the wrong way or did wind up hurting someone, but I pray that God will let me know when I've said something so I can go and apologize as soon as possible. Mostly I pray that the words that come out of my mouth are always said/used to build someone up and never tear them down, and that my words are said in love and not anger.

Cast Off

2009-01-05T13:11:00.003-05:00

I'm sure you know as well as I do that it can be very easy to worry about stuff, especially when it is out of our control. I Peter 5: 7 says "Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you." Isn't it awesome to know that we can take all our worries and concerns to the creator of the universe?! Some may think that the God who created the universe couldn't care less about us, but that is NOT what the Bible tells us! God LOVES us and He CARES about what we are going through and what is bothering us. He wants us to bring all our cares to Him and LEAVE THEM THERE! He doesn't want us to worry about anything. He wants us to tell Him what is bothering us so that we don't need to continue worrying about it because we know that He will take care of everything!

As I was thinking about this verse, I realized I had done just that the night before. For the past month, Micah has had a cough that just won't go away. On the good days, he only coughs first thing in the morning and when he first goes to bed. When it gets bad, he'll cough all day and all night. Sarah had a bad cough a few weeks ago that only lasted for a few days and then went away. Saturday she woke up with a persistent cough that would just not quit. Saturday night, I didn't get more than an hour or two of sleep because I could hear Sarah and Micah coughing so badly. I had already given them cough medicine so there was nothing else I could do but lie there and listen to them. My husband stayed home with both kids on Sunday because I had to be there since I was singing on the worship team. God gave me the strength to sing and praise Him in spite of how tired I was. I usually go to bed around 11 pm, but it was barely 9 pm Sunday night and I couldn't stay awake any longer. Before heading to bed, I let God know that I was extremely tired and needed to sleep tonight. As I walked up the stairs, I could hear Sarah coughing. I climbed into bed, heard her cough again, but I fell asleep shortly thereafter and slept all the way through the night! My kids are still coughing today, but I truly believe the Lord quieted their coughs last night because I told Him my concern about needing to sleep so I could function today (which I definitely needed since vacation is over and school has started again).

There may be times you feel what you are worried about seems small or insignificant, but God cares about it no matter what it is! Don't hold on to your worries and fears. Cast them off yourself and onto God. Let Him deal with them!

My New Year's Resolution

2009-01-03T18:42:00.004-05:00

I hope all of you had a wonderful Christmas. I also hope the Lord blesses each of you richly this coming year. I don't usually make resolutions, but the idea of making a "resolution" came to mind on Dec. 31 as I was doing my devotions. It's been something I've been wanting to do, and I guess the Lord was letting me know to give it to Him and see what happens. So, I made a resolution to cut back on the amount of soda I drink each day...to just one can a day (instead of the 2-3 I was drinking). I know there may be days I drink more than one, but I'm not going to beat myself up over it. I know there's going to definitely be some testing in the weeks ahead because next weekend we have 3 birthday parties, one of which is for Sarah's 10th birthday!! The week after that is a bridal shower. Next month, we have a wedding and the following week is a party for Micah's 5th birthday! I know I'm allowed to celebrate from time to time and have an extra soda, but I'm really going to try to keep in mind that I want to succeed at this and not have an extra glass or can of soda just because "I can celebrate today and drink just one tomorrow." I know with God's help, I'll be able to keep my focus and stick to it this time because I've written it down and given this to God!

Of course, Satan also knows about this and is already trying to make me fail. It only took ONE day for me to feel the effects of cutting back on my soda intake. Yesterday I had a massive headache all day long, and I truly think it may have been a caffeine withdrawal headache! I've had them before when I tried to cut back, and I usually gave up trying because I just could not stand dealing with the headache. I refused to drink a soda like I REALLY wanted to at lunch because I was NOT going to give in so easily this time! I survived and today I felt much better. My daughter Sarah is cheering for Upwards this year and today was her first game. I kept myself busy for awhile taking pictures and talking, but then Micah said he was hungry because he saw there was a table set up with snacks on it. So I took him over to the table and bought him a juice box and some goldfish. Why am I telling you this? Because they also had cans of soda in the same cooler as the juice boxes. I actually picked one up and it was as if God quietly reminded me that I really didn't need that. It wasn't even that hard for me to put the soda back down in the ice and walk away! I definitely look forward to dinner when I do get to drink my can of soda, but I have made it 3 days now and have only had one soda each day! HURRAY!

Now since I told you I bought a digital camera and could post some pictures more often, I suppose I should let you see some pictures from our Christmas! In order to keep the focus on the true meaning of Christmas, we do three gifts that symbolize the three gifts the Wise Men brought to Jesus. Gold is something they want. This year Sarah got a Little Pets set (Picture #3) and Micah got an Ambulance (Picture #4). Frankincense is something they need, which is always clothes (Picture #2 shows them holding up the top of their outfits. Both Sarah and Micah got a 2-piece outfit)! Myrrh is something to build them up spiritually (Bible, video, Christian CD). This year they both got CDs (Picture #1 shows them opening/looking at their CDs). The last picture is a family picture that was taken at my parent's house. Hope you enjoy them!

Forgiven

2008-12-10T07:44:00.003-05:00

I John 1:9 says "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." I've heard and read that verse many times, but yesterday I was thankful when I read that verse! Thankful because I was reminded of the days when people had to offer burnt offerings as a sacrifice as they sought forgiveness for their sins. I was thankful that we don't have to do that! Jesus was the ultimate sacrifice when He died for our sins upon the cross. I was thankful I don't live in a country where people think they need to hurt themselves or make a big public display when they commit a sin and seek forgiveness.

When I read this verse, I just thought how EASY it was to have our sins forgiven. All we need to do is confess our sins! OK, I know admitting we sinned and did something wrong can be quite difficult at times; however, what we receive in return makes it all worth it! We receive TOTAL forgiveness! How many times has someone told us that they forgive us, yet they keep reminding us of what we did wrong. God does NOT do that! He forgives us and forgets it. He will NEVER remind us of our past failures and sins.

Our worship team leader gave an illustration that fits perfectly with this. She said she envisioned a man standing alone. He could hear God's voice, but he couldn't see Him. She then saw that God's voice was coming from behind this brick wall that surrounded the man. On each brick she saw a sin that this man had committed: unforgiveness, hatred, lust, etc. Those sins were what was separating this man from God. She then saw the other side of the wall, the side that God was looking at. On every brick was written "FORGIVEN". This man was looking at all the things he had done wrong, yet God had already forgiven him for all those things! He simply needed to tear down that wall so that he could be close to God!

Are there sins in your life that Satan keeps reminding you of? Have you already asked God to forgive you of those sins? Then you ARE forgiven! You can tell Satan that you are no longer bound by those sins because God forgave you from them and He has forgotten them! If you have unconfessed sins, all you have to do is confess them to God and you will be forgiven! Don't build a wall! Tear it down! Draw close to God.

Just had to share!

2008-11-29T16:00:00.003-05:00

We went to the Palmer Park Mall last night to go to Dairy Queen. We had a "buy one blizzard, get one free" coupon and if you are like me, you just can't let one of those coupons go to waste! I saw they had a Boscov's there and since we had a gift card to use, we went in to look around. I saw they had digital cameras on sale so I looked at them and decided to buy one that was on sale (one we could actually afford!), but they told me I couldn't use the Boscov's gift card there because the place selling the cameras is actually a Ritz Camera Store that just rents the space in Boscov's. CRUD! So I reluctantly said I didn't want it after all then and we kept looking around. We found a set of cook wear on sale, so I used the gift card on that and spent a whopping $8.00 for a 10 piece set! Bob knew how much I've wanted a digital camera though so he said as long as we could pay for the camera when the bill came, I could go ahead and buy it! So I bought myself a Christmas gift! I know there are many digital cameras better than the one I bought (Olympus FE-310), but this one fit our budget and does what I need it to do...take nice pictures! I'll have to learn more about the various functions it does because right now I just keep it on the AUTO setting! LOL!

The saleswoman actually suggested we buy rechargeable batteries for it because she said it will use regular AA batteries very quickly and that will save us some money. I also read the instructions book and saw I could use the camera without a memory card (it would just save the pictures on the camera's internal memory), but I wanted to be able to print off pictures OCCASIONALLY at Wal-mart and I'm pretty sure you need a memory card to do that. So I went to Amazon.com and looked at what they charge for a memory card and rechargeable batteries. I knew I had about $50 in gift certificates that I could use toward the total cost, so my price for a 2 GB memory card and 2 packs of AA rechargeable batteries (total of 8 batteries since there were 4 in a pack) came to...are you ready for this?.....NOTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YEEHAW!! Now I can post pictures more frequently on here if I want to! Yup, that picture at the beginning of this post is one of the pictures I took today with my new camera! YEAH!

"Patient Endurance"

2008-11-27T07:48:00.002-05:00

My daughter and I have been working our way through the book of Revelation. I noticed something the other day and today seemed like the perfect day to write about it. The last sentence in Revelation 13:10 says "This calls for patient endurance and faithfulness on the part of the saints." Revelation 14:12 says "This calls for patient endurance on the part of the saints who obey God's commandments and remain faithful to Jesus." I guess I noticed the verse in chapter 14 because I realized it was so close to one I had just read the day before, in chapter 13. God has a really cool way of pointing things out to us when we miss it the first time!

As I've been reading about all the horrible things that the world is going to have to face during the end times, I am constantly reminded that Christians don't need to fear the end times because we know we are on the winning side! That doesn't mean the end times are going to be easy for us! The persecution and other difficulties are going to be very hard and the true Christians will be weeded out from those who call themselves Christians but haven't given their entire lives over to God. We very well may be faced with having to make the decision to die for our faith or having to watch our loved ones die for their faith. True Christians will know that no matter what happens, we need to stay faithful to God and not turn away from God when things get rough or dangerous.

It seems impossible to think of being patient during a long period of persecution, but we have the assurance that we have an awesome reward waiting for us if we successfully endure those times. No matter what happens, we know that one day we will be in heaven for all eternity with our Lord and Savior. That is something Satan cannot take from us! He may try to harm our physical bodies, but he cannot harm us spiritually. Our physical bodies may die, but our spirits will live forever with God! One day (and I belive it is going to be soon!), we are going to see our Lord! We are going to be able to bow down and worship the One who died for us so that we could live with Him in Heaven for all eternity. Now that's something to be thankful for!!

Be an Overcomer!

2008-11-10T19:47:00.005-05:00

It is truly awesome how the Lord directs us in the way we should go if we are just listening to Him! The past few months, I have been reading books of the Bible that I felt God telling me to read. First, I read Proverbs because our pastor encouraged us to read one proverbs every day. Since there are 30 chapters, he said to read the chapter that is the same as the date. I didn't actually start doing it the first time the pastor said to do this, but I finally started to do it because I just kept hearing God saying "Read Proverbs!". After I read Proverbs, I felt the Lord urging me to read the book of Psalm so I began reading there. As I finished reading Psalm, I felt the Lord tell me to read James. As you know, I learned a lot in those few chapters!! I knew as I was reading through James, I was having an urge to read the book of Revelation next. About an hour after I had read the last chapter of James, my daughter told me that she had decided to start reading Revelation because I had mentioned something to her about Revelation talking about the last days. I knew immediately that God had started working on my heart to read Revelation so that I could help my daughter understand it better! I knew if I left it up to her, she'd read it through as fast as she could and miss A LOT. So every morning we both read the same chapter in Revelation separately and then she comes into my room and I read to her what my study Bible has to say about that chapter. I'm really looking forward to what God is going to do in both of our lives as a result of doing this together!

Today we read Revelation 3 and a few verses really stood out to me. Verse 5 says "He who overcomes will, like them, be dressed in white. I will never blot out his name from the book of life, but will acknowledge his name before my Father and his angels." WOW! How exciting is that to know that Christians have the assurance that Jesus Christ HIMSELF will introduce us to GOD! I know some Christians believe in "onced saved, always saved" while others believe that you can lose your salvation. I'm not going to get into that, but I mention it because I thought of that as I read this verse. I reread it and saw "He who OVERCOMES..." and I just felt the Lord reminding me how I need to overcome whatever I have to face and be faithful in serving Him if I want to receive the full inheritance God has for His children. Near the end of Revelation 3, there is another verse that I will add bold print to, and I'm sure you'll see why! Verse 21 says "To him who overcomes, I will give the right to sit with me on my throne, just as I overcame and sat down with my Father on his throne." Another awesome promise....if you are an overcomer!! Can you imagine it?! Sitting with Jesus on his throne?! WOW! I have chills again as I type this!!

Life on this earth isn't easy, but we have an awesome promise of what is to come if we will just give our lives to God and trust Him throughout all of life's difficulties. I want to be an overcomer! I want to hear Jesus tell God that He knows me and invites me to sit with Him on His throne! I just want to SEE Jesus and say thank Him for being willing to be an overcomer as well. He didn't have to die for me, but He did...so that I could have the chance of going to heaven too! As Christians, we are to be "like Christ". So if Jesus could be an overcomer and DIE for us, then I think the least we can do is be overcomers by doing whatever He tells us to do and trusting Him 100%.

God is in Control

2008-11-05T09:12:00.002-05:00

God is so awesome! As I listened to the election results last night, I began to have this sickening feeling in the pit of my stomach and fear for my country started to creep in. I closed my eyes and just heard the Lord say "It's going to be OK. I'm in control." I went to bed, but awoke this morning feeling anxious again about the whole thing.

I picked up my Bible and began to read the last chapter of James. I literally got chills when I read James 5:8. That verse says "You too, be patient and stand firm, because the Lord's coming is near." I got chills again when I wrote it down in my journal, when I shared this verse with my kids this morning, and when I just wrote it down here! My Lord is coming again SOON!

That thought of course struck a little bit of fear in me because I feel so unprepared for His return. I have been struggling with my temper lately, as I have mentioned in previous posts. The cool thing is that I KNOW the Lord pointed this out to me and that He's helping me. He KNOWS I am working on it and He is being so very patient with me. It has just been such an awesome experience the past few weeks/months HEARING the Lord speaking to me and teaching me things! I know I have accepted the Lord as my personal Lord and Savior, but it just seems like Satan wants to get me to doubt my salvation. The Lord reminded me this morning as I was sitting there with a bit of fear as to whether I was truly ready that because I have accepted the Lord as my Savior, I can have the confidence of knowing that I WILL go to heaven when the Lord returns.

As if all this wasn't cool enough, the Lord has one more awesome thing to add to my devotional time this morning. I actually had gotten up a little early this morning and decided to start doing my devotions since I just felt so uneasy upon awakening. I read James Chapter 5 and was almost finished writing in my journal when the radio suddenly came on. I have my "alarm" set for 7 am and at that time the radio comes on so I can wake up to music (or occasionally the talking of the DJs) instead of an obnoxious alarm. Well, I know it was NO coincidence what song was playing when the radio came on this morning! The song that was playing was "God is in Control" by Twila Paris! I had to stop what I was writing because I immediately started to cry and praise the Lord for how awesome He is!

So take heart my friends! Our God is in control and He is coming again SOON! There may be some difficult times ahead, but we can rest in the assurance that we serve a mighty God and He knows everything that is in store for us. He isn't going to leave us. We just need to put our trust in Him and keep having faith because He knows exactly what needs to happen before He can return. I'm ready Lord!!

What Kind of Teacher am I?

2008-11-03T08:56:00.004-05:00

Saturday morning when I picked up my Bible to do my devotions, I was a bit stunned when I read the very first verse. James 3:1 says "Not many of you should presume to be teachers, my brothers, because you know that we who teach will be judged more strictly." I just about stopped reading because my brain was filled with wondering whether God was telling me I shouldn't be homeschooling my kids! Luckily, God reassured me that was NOT what He was telling me, but that He was trying to teach me something. I thought to myself "OK, this is gonna hurt!", but I kept reading and then picked up my journal and started to write as God made it clear to me what He wanted me to learn.

God brought to mind the verses He had pointed out to me just a few days earlier. James 1: 19-20 says "My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires." I knew the other day God was letting me know that I REALLY needed to do a much better job of watching what I say and how I say it. I have been letting the daily frustrations get to me and the way I have been reacting and the things I have said have not been very nice, and they certainly were not pleasing to God. I sought God's forgiveness and renewed my desire to be a Godly example to my kids in everything I say and do, but especially when I find myself getting frustrated or angry! How will they know how to react in an acceptable manner if they don't see me acting appropriately and setting a good example for them? I know I can't do it in my own strength, which is why I'll be praying for God's wisdom and strength each day.

In light of what God had been teaching me the past few days and weeks about guarding my tongue and not being easily provoked, I was able to see where God was headed when I read James 3:1. I am going to be judged more strictly because I am having a huge influence on my kids. I am teaching them right from wrong and having a daily influence on how they should act based upon what they see and hear ME doing. I have asked my kids to forgive me as well. I have to hope and pray that they forget the things I have done wrong and only remember the good!

Lord, forgive me for the times I have allowed my frustrations to get out of control. Forgive me for the unkind things I have said during those times. Remind me when I am reaching that point, to walk away or count to 10 or do whatever it takes to get my thoughts and emotions in check before I speak even one word. I want to be a teacher that my kids remember all their lives and strife to be like! I want to hear you say to me "Well done though good and faithful servant!" and know that my kids are going to hear that too when they stand before you! Help me to be more like you each and every day so that when someone says "your kids are just like you", I can take that as the best compliment in the world!

Say What?!

2008-10-27T13:15:00.002-04:00

The other day I finished reading the book of Psalm and I wondered what book of the Bible I should read next. The name "James" popped into my mind so quickly that I literally said "OK God, the book of James it is!". As I opened my Bible this morning to James, I noticed there were many verses in Chapter 1 that were underlined. I quickly realized that God definitely had told me to read James for a reason and I was excited to see what God wanted to teach me. There is definitely a lot to "chew on" in chapter one so I decided that I'm going to spend a few days at least just reading the chapter over and over again and focusing on each verse, one at a time.

There were two verses though that stood out at me this morning. I was journaling about the first one, God showed me how the second one related to what He was trying to show me. I just love when God does that!! James 1: 2 says "Consider it pure job, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds". Now I know this verse continues in verse 3 that "the testing of your faith develops perseverance", but I was focused on just what it said in verse 2. How many times do I praise the Lord or am even just happy when I am faced with a trial? hmm...probably...never! The Lord brought to my mind how frustrated I can get with teaching my kids at home. The first thing I thought of was that I should be happy that I even have the opportunity to teach my kids at home! I know that in my frustration, I don't always say the nicest things. That thought led me right to the other verse that stood out in my reading. Verse 26 says "If anyone considers himself religious and yet does not keep a tight rein on his tongue, he deceives himself and his religion is worthless." OUCH!!!!! That was like a knife straight through the heart! God definitely was letting me know that I have to watch what I say because my Christian witness depends on it!

This may just have been verses that God was using to speak to me, but I also felt like I needed to share it on here....so I'm being obedient and typing this out for everyone to see. I know it is hard to be thankful for the trials that come your way, but we know that God will teach us something through those trials and for that we can be thankful. I also know it can be very hard to watch what comes out of your mouth when frustrations are at their peak, but we must keep in mind that someone is always watching us. If we claim to be Christians, our actions AND our words must always point others to Christ.

Ask Him!

2008-10-22T18:32:00.002-04:00

As most of you can probably tell, I've been reading through the book of Psalms for the past few months. Last Thursday, I went to worship team rehearsal and discovered that our worship team leader had decided that our worship team was going to read through the book of Psalms together. We are going to do one chapter every Thursday night before we begin rehearsals.

Tomorrow we will be on Chapter 2 so I decided to do as our worship team leader asked and read the chapter ahead of time. I guess I figured that I was going to be able to share a lot of what God had shown me the past few months as we worked through the book together, but God showed me that my plans were not His plans!

I didn't have any verses underlined in Chapter 2 and as I started to read, I thought that this was probably one of the chapters where none of the verses really jumped out at me and I wouldn't really have much if anything to share. Well then I read verse 8: "Ask of me, and I will make the nations your inheritance, the ends of the earth your possessions." It was almost like God shone a light on that verse this time around!

Even though this verse is speaking to kings, I knew God was speaking directly to me. I thought of all the times when I don't think something is that important so I don't bring it to God. How can God give us the desires of our heart, if we don't tell Him what they are?! Yes, I know God knows everything. He knows our hearts and He knows our thoughts, but He also tells us to ASK HIM for what we want. I pictured God sitting up in heaven on His throne, knowing exactly what is on our hearts, and yelling "ASK ME FOR IT!!!!" God WANTS to give us so much, and all He wants us to do is ask Him for it!! Now I know I can't say "I want a million dollars God!" and it will magically show up, but I know that I can and should tell God the desires of my heart because then He can give them to me in His time if it is in His will.

So don't just hold in all those hopes and dreams, tell God about them! Ask Him to give them to you! Then don't be surpised when they start to come true! God is our loving, heavenly father. He is just waiting for you to ask Him for what you want/need.

I Corinthians 13

2008-10-17T11:29:00.002-04:00

1 If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3 If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.
4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
8 Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 9 For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10 but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. 11 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. 12 Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.
13 And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

As I mentioned in my previous post, our pastor has been doing an awesome serious about "Trusting Steadily, Hoping Unswervingly, Loving Extravagantly". It can be a challenge to trust, hope, or love at times. It becomes an even bigger challenge to trust STEADILY (free from change, variation, or interruption; uniform), hope UNSWERVINGLY (constant, steady, not veering or turning aside), and love EXTRAVAGANTLY (going beyond what is deserved or justifiable).

I included I Corinthians 13 in this post because in order to love extravagantly, you need to know exactly what love is. Go back and reread I Corinthians 13: 4-7, but replace the word "love" or "it" (where it refers to love) each time with your name. OUCH! I definitely can't say that I'm able to do all of those things all the time. I definitely struggle with patience and not being easily angered. As a mom to a very strong-willed daughter and a hyber little boy, I don't seem to have any patience some days and I can get angry way too easily.

I have been challenged these past few weeks to get better at living the way God wants me to. Unfortunately, Satan knows it! He's been throwing a lot of stuff my way and I hate to admit it, but I have failed miserably quite a few times this week. However, I'm NOT giving up! I know what I need to work on and am determined to succeed at getting better. I know I can't do it in my own strength. I need to ask God each day for help, which I admit I haven't always done. I'm sure you already know this, but I'm going to say it anyway: I'm not perfect!! I need God's help each and every day to help me react in a Godly, Christlike manner! I know it is going to be hard; but I know with God's help, I CAN DO IT!

No Record

2008-10-13T09:04:00.002-04:00

Our pastor has been doing a series entitled "Trusting Steadily, Hoping Unswervingly, Loving Extravagently". I Corinthians 13 was running through my head this morning and I thought that I was going to write about that, but I think I'll do that tomorrow now (or sometime this week hopefully!) because I think God wanted me to write something different today. I picked up my Bible to do my daily devotions and started to read Psalm 130. Well I didn't get very far before a verse leaped off the page and I just knew that God had led me to a topic for today's blog.

Psalm 130: 3 says "If you, O Lord, kept a record of sins, O Lord, who could stand?" As I already mentioned, I was already thinking about I Corinthians 13 so I instantly thought of verse 5 that says "love....keeps no record of wrongs". It is not easy to forget when someone says or does something that hurts us. It's easy to hold onto that "sin" so that we feel justified by our attitude towards that person. What about me though? Am I perfect? Obviously the answer to that is a huge NO!!!!!!!! Have I ever said or done something to hurt someone else? Whether it was intentional or not, sadly my answer is YES. What right then do I have to hold it against someone who has hurt me?

Thank God that He doesn't hold our sins against us! Thank God that He has FORGIVEN us and doesn't remember our sins! I need to daily ask God for His forgiveness because I know I still say and do things that are not pleasing to Him. I try to ask for forgiveness right away when I know I said or did something that hurt someone or just plain wasn't nice, but I'm sure there are things I don't know were taken the wrong way. I was just really impressed this morning to write about this because it is something God seems to be reminding me of...to forgive and FORGET when someone hurts me because HE has forgiven and forgotten ME for what I've done!

Where Does My Help Come From?

2008-10-08T07:34:00.002-04:00

Psalm 121: 1-2 says "I lift up my eyes to the hills - where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth." When I first read that this morning, I pictured myself standing in a valley with mountains surrounding me. Those mountains are obstacles to me. How can I possibly get out of this valley? How can I possibly make it over those mountains? HELP!!!! Then I realized that my God created those mountains! He knows every foothold, nook, cranny, ledge, etc. that will help me to successfully make it over those mountains! He can show me exactly what I need to do to make it safely over the obstacle that was before me. All I need to do is ask Him for His help!

Psalm 121: 7-8 says "The Lord will keep you from all harm - he will watch over your life; the Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore." WOW! What an awesome promise!!! It doesn't matter what obstacle I may have to face today or in the future. My God is going to be right there beside me EVERY time!

I don't know what you are going through. I don't know what obstacles you are going to have to face today or in the near or even distant future. I do know that God is going to be with you, so I know that you can make it over (or through) any obstacles that come your way! All you need to do is ask Him for His help.

No, I Didn't Forget about My Blog

2008-10-04T19:56:00.005-04:00

I know I don't have too many people who read my blog (that I know of anyway), but I figured I better get back on here and write something so you don't think I fell off the face of the earth or disappeared into thin air or something! Life has just been extremely busy since school started back up. Sarah is in 4th grade this year and cyberschooling her hasn't gotten much easier in our second year doing it! I'm also trying to get Micah prepared for school since he will be in kindergarten next year. ACK! When did he get that old?! I'm teaching him the letters of the alphabet so that he can recognize them as well as how to write them and what sound they make. He is doing pretty good with recognizing most of the letters as well as what sound they make! There are a few that he just can't seem to grasp though, which has proven to be very frustrating for me when I have remind him "this is a J" for the billionth time!

I read Psalm 118 the other morning and discovered there are 3 songs that came to mind as I read through that chapter. Verse 1 says "Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; his love endures forever." Well of course that immediately set me to singing the song "Forever". I'm sure you know it; but if not (or if you just aren't sure), it is the sixth song on my playlist, as sung by Michael W. Smith. Verse 24 says "This is the day the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it." Well now I was singing that little chorus, which I haven't heard in a LONG time so it was kind of neat to be reminded of it! The first part of verse 26 says "Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord", which again reminded me of a song I haven't heard in a little while! Verse 29 is the last verse in that chapter and it is exactly the same as verse 1, which I found to be kind of cool!

Obviously it was hard to concentrate on reading the whole chapter with all those songs popping into my head; however, one verse did grab my attention. Verse 14 says "The Lord is my strength and my song; he has become my salvation." I put in bold the part of that verse that just made me smile. I don't think I would have ever thought to say the Lord is "my song" if someone asked me what the Lord means to me, but that truly would be a very fitting thing to say considering my love for music and the fact that singing is such a big part of my life. It is so easy to worship the Lord when I sing or just listen to certain songs. As I type this, I am listening to the songs on my playlist and have had to stop quite a few times to just raise my hands and worship the Lord. I want the Lord to truly be my song! I want to just think about the Lord and feel the way I do when I am listening to praise music and am ushered into His presence through the words and music of those songs. I have a feeling I would be a much calmer person if I focused on worshipping the Lord and all He is, especially during all those stressful times that come along! I am going to work on that!

Strength

2008-09-18T11:59:00.003-04:00

Yesterday my husband asked for my help. He asked me to hold a wrench that he had clasped onto the top of a faucet so he could use another wrench to try and loosen the metal part of a hose that was attached to the faucet (it was the faucet and hose that supply cold water to the washing machine) . I am truly sorry for not knowing all the proper terms for these things; but hey, I'm a female! What else do you expect?! LOL! The metal part of the hose was stuck firm to the faucet and could not be twisted off by hand, so my husband had been trying to turn it with a wrench; but the pipe kept moving. He needed the whole thing to be held still so his strength could be solely focused on that metal part of the hose. At first I tried to just hold the wrench still, but I failed miserably. My husband of course frustratingly said "You have no strength!". I told him I was trying to hold it still, but I didn't want to push the wrench into the wall. I was afraid of putting a dent or hole in the wall, not that it really mattered since the wall was already dirty and the new washer and dryer would have probably covered any mark the wrench had put in the wall. He told me I HAD to do that, so he placed the wrench against the wall and told me to hold it there. It was amazing how easy it was to hold the wrench in place now and my husband was finally able to get the metal attachment of the hose to break free and get it off of the faucet.

This morning I read Psalm 105. Verse 4 says "Look to the Lord and His strength; seek his face always." I quickly remembered the event that had taken place yesterday and realized that I HAD to push the wrench against the wall because it offered support and therefore enable me to be "stronger" so the task was able to be accomplished. I couldn't push hard enough on that wrench alone. I NEEDED the support of the wall. I heard the Lord telling me today that He is my wall. I need to lean on Him in those tough times so that He can give me the support and strength that I need to make it through. I can accomplish whatever task comes my way if I rely on Him. How often do I first try to do things on my own, and in my own strength? WHY do I do that when the almighty God is just a prayer away?! He is there waiting to supply me with His INFINITE strength! All I need to do is ASK! So the next time you are faced with a difficult task, lean on God and His strength will enable you to complete the task!

Honesty is the Best Policy

2008-08-30T19:16:00.003-04:00

As many of you know, we are a one income family. Finances are tight so we look for sales whenever we can. We went to the mall on Saturday to use some Chick-fil-A coupons. One coupon was expiring at the end of the month...and you just can't let a coupon for a free Chick-fil-A chicken salad sandwich go to waste!! It's against the law! Well, it is for us anyway! LOL!

After we ate our dinner, we decided to check if the Disney store had any of their T-shirts on sale yet for $5.00 each. My kids LOVE Disney movies so we knew they'd be able to easily find a shirt they liked with one of their favorite characters on it. Micah LOVES Cars and Toy Story stuff. He watched a movie the other week with Buzz Lightyear in it and ever since has been running around the house shooting his imaginary laser beam at imaginary enemies. Sarah LOVES every single Disney princess and anything that has one or more of them on it. We walked into the store and immediately saw they did have shirts for $5, but we also noticed other things on sale so we started to walk around. As we browsed through the store, I found some coats on sale that had different princesses on them. They were originally $29.50 and were marked down to $14.99. Last year I noticed Sarah's lightweight coat was overdue to be tossed in the garbage. How she manages to SHRED a coat is beyond me! Anyway, I knew when I saw these coats that one of these would be just perfect for her. I picked one up that was pink and had 3 of the Disney Princesses on the back. Sarah fell in love with it as soon as she saw it in my hands!

We looked around to see if they had any coats for boys, but we were out of luck because they had none. Phooey! So we went back to the shirts and Micah picked one with Woody and Buzz and the gang as well as a set of 3 cars from the movie CARS. We put the stuff on the counter and the cashier asked us if we wanted to reserve a copy of Snow White which is out on DVD now for only a short period of time. Of course Sarah started to beg and we had to tell her we just didn't want to spend that much money on a movie. My husband paid the bill as he listened to what I was telling Sarah (who thankfully accepted what I was saying without fussing about it). Obviously, neither one of us really paid attention to the total as a result of being distracted by our kids.

We came home, got Micah into the tub for his Saturday night bath, put the kids to bed, and then I went online to play some game. After an hour or so, I remembered I hadn't taken the stuff out of the bag so I went to do that. That is when I happened to look at the receipt and knew immediately that something was wrong. They total was only $14.50! They had forgotten to charge us for Sarah's coat! Of course, the first thought to pop into my head was "Wow! We got a free coat!", but I knew that thought was not from God! I took the receipt to my husband and asked him "What's wrong with this receipt?". He looked at it and you could tell he realized immediately something wasn't right. He finally said "they didn't charge us for the coat." I sort of expected him to say something like "Oh well! It's not our fault they didn't charge us!" in a half-joking manner, but he said "Call and tell them." I was so proud of him!

I called the store and told the lady who answered that I had just noticed that we were not charged for an item. She asked "Was it in the bag?" and I said yes. I told her we were an honest family and wanted to do the right thing. I could tell she was stunned by what she was hearing! She said "Just a minute. Let me check with the manager what he wants to do, because I really don't know what to say!" She came back on the phone after a few minutes and said whenever we were in the area, to bring the item and the receipt in. She thanked me again and said "We aren't use to this happening!". We are going to be in that area today so we are going to take it in then. At least we don't have to make a special trip to the store and waste gas! I honestly think they will be surprised to see us because I sort of expect them to still be thinking we are not going to show up and pay for a coat that they forgot to charge us for!

I was looking forward to telling my kids this morning what happened! What an excellent opportunity for my kids to learn that honesty is the best policy! I talked to my kids separately because I wanted to hear what they thought we should do without being influenced by the other. I told Micah what happened and stopped at me finding out that we were never charged for Sarah's coat. I asked him what we should do and he said "Pray". I asked why and he just put his head down and said "I don't know." LOL! Actually I think he knew that what had happened wasn't right and he knows we are suppose to pray for forgiveness when we do something wrong. I explained to him that we need to take the coat back and pay for it because that's the right thing to do, otherwise it is sort of like we stole the coat because we would know it wasn't paid for (even though we left the store fully expecting to have paid for the coat!). I then asked Sarah what her first thought would be and I told her what happened, stopping at the same place I did with Micah. Sarah's response "Take the coat back." WOO HOO! She HAS learned something from us after all! LOL!

I let both kids know how easy it could have been to rationalize that "God knew we needed a coat for Sarah and we don't have a lot, so He blessed us with a free coat.", but we need to realize that is not the right thing to do. It's easy for people to go back to the store when they are overcharged. So why don't people do the same when the mistake is in their own favor and they are not charged for something? Everyone makes mistakes and it isn't fair to take advantage of someone's mistake just because it benefits us.

Don't Be Stupid

2008-08-27T17:14:00.003-04:00

Over the past week, we've been reading about the Israelites during our family worship. We read about how they saw first hand many miracles, and yet they still kept turning away from God. Ever since I first read the story of the Israelites in the Bible as a young girl, I remember thinking those people were so STUPID. How could they see all those miracles and yet still not believe that God was big enough to do ANYTHING? They were constantly complaining about something instead of being thankful for everything the Lord had done for them.

As I read the stories with my kids over the past week, the Lord started to speak to my heart. I can act just like those Israelites at times. I can see how many times the Lord has worked in my life and answered prayers, but I still worry and fret when I'm faced with a scary or difficult situation. When things are going good, it is easy to praise the Lord for what He is doing; but it is easy to complain and worry when things aren't going so well. I was faced with having to say to myself "How stupid can you be?!".

I know it can be hard when you are going through a difficult time to focus on all the good things God has done for you. It is also hard to try and see how God could be using the situation you are in to make you a better person. I know I need to try to always remember (especially when things are not going well) that "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." Let's not be like the Israelites and make the same mistakes they made! Don't forget God when things get tough. TRUST HIM! THANK HIM! PRAISE HIM! PRAY TO HIM! He's still there even when the good times aren't!

Back To School

2008-08-22T07:31:00.002-04:00

Sorry that I haven't been posting much. As many of you know, I homeschool my daughter Sarah using a cyber school. Well, school started this week! My son Micah will be starting kindergarten next year (WAH!!) so I decided I should start him on some preschool stuff to give him a bit of a head start (hopefully!) on school next year.

I've gotten a taste of what it is going to be like next year when teaching two kids instead of just one, and I've realized in just one week how hard it is going to be! I have been working on having Micah recognize and write his letters and numbers. Some days he is ready and willing to learn. Other days...not so much. He has known his alphabet for over a year, but he refused to say it the one day when I asked him to say it so he could find out what the letter was I was pointing to. Sarah has been testing me all week by not paying attention to what she's suppose to be doing and paying attention to what I'm doing with Micah. She has made a lot of stupid mistakes simply because she didn't read the directions or she wasn't paying attention. Can you say FRUSTRATING?!

Yesterday morning I did my devotions and then started to write in my journal. My frustrations with Sarah were heavy on my heart and I started to pour my heart out to God about it. I quickly discovered that God had a message for me! He calmly let me know that while teaching my kids is important, I need to make sure I am teaching them about what is truly important in life....HIM. As much as I try to do that, I know I have not been doing a very good job of being an example to them this week. Guess I need to go "back to school" too and start doing a better job of teaching my kids academically AND spiritually....by word AND actions!

Don't Give Up!

2008-08-12T08:44:00.003-04:00

Our family has been enjoying watching the Olympics the past few days. I noticed in two swimming races, the commentators basically wrote off everyone else because they were so certain that a specific athlete was going to win the gold. I love to see an athlete who isn't expected to win have the race of their life and win a medal. I especially love to see an athlete win who is from a country who has never won a medal or rarely wins a medal. So it is safe to say that I was a little annoyed that the commentators were soooooo certain that a specific athlete from a specific country was going to win. I knew they might be right, but I also know that anything is possible in the Olympics! Both races had American athletes in them who, according to the commentators, would be fighting for silver or bronze because they didn't stand a chance at beating the athlete(s) from another country. I cheered our athletes on in spite of what the commentators were saying, and it was a THRILL to see the Americans win the GOLD in one race and the SILVER in the other!! The "winner" chosen by the commentators won the silver in the race where we won the gold. In the other race, the athlete who was supposedly going to win the gold placed 5th!

Yesterday I watched the U.S. men's gymastic team win a bronze medal. Many people (including other Americans!) had pretty much written the team off because they had lost a few of their regular gymnasts to injuries prior to the Olympics and they needed to call on the alternates to perform in the Olympics. Members of our team said they had heard so many times that they didn't stand a chance, but that made them more determined than ever to prove everyone wrong....and that's exactly what they did! What a thrill to see them accept the bronze medal in the team competition!

So why did I decide to write all that? I guess it was to let everyone know that you should NEVER GIVE UP! There will always be someone rooting for you, cheering you on, and having faith that you WILL succeed! Even if it seems that everyone around you doesn't have faith in you or doesn't care, GOD CARES!! He is ALWAYS on your side! He KNOWS you can do it!

Be Steadfast

2008-08-04T12:23:00.003-04:00

Psalm 57:7 says "My heart is steadfast, O God, my heart is steadfast; I will sing and make music." I thought I was drawn to that verse this morning simply because it talked about singing, and as many of you know by now, I LOVE music and especially singing! It is truly my passion and I am so thankful that the Lord has blessed me with that gift. I know there have been many times that the Lord has ministered to me through the words of a song. I am always in awe of how the right song will come on the radio just when I need it most.

After reading in Psalms, I decided to read my Proverb for the day. Proverbs 4: 25-27 really struck me today: "Let your eyes look straight ahead, fix your gaze directly before you. Make level paths for your feet and take only ways that are firm. Do not swerve to the right or the left; keep your foot from evil."

The first thought that came to my mind after reading those verses was to picture someone on a balance beam. Maybe God brought that to my mind because the Olympics will be starting at the end of this week. LOL! All I know is that it had to be from God because I am certainly NOT a gymnast and I wouldn't have thought of that analogy on my own! Anyway, I thought of being on a balance beam and how you have to make sure your feet are always placed directly on the beam. If your foot is off to the right or left just a little bit, it can throw you off balance and cause you to fall. Gymnasts don't need to even look down to know whether their foot has landed firmly on the beam or off to one side because they can FEEL the difference between the two immediately.

I then thought of how it says in verse 25 to look straight ahead and fix your gaze directly before you. I immediately thought about carrying a full glass of milk, hot tea or coffee, or any other beverage. I remember the first time someone told me that I shouldn't look at the glass I was carrying but instead I should LOOK UP so I could see where I wanted to get to. I thought they were crazy! I thought for sure I would spill stuff out of my glass, but I trusted the person enough to listen to them and try it. I walked right over to where I wanted to go and didn't spill a drop. Amazing!

After finishing my devotions, I decided that I wanted to look up the definition for the word steadfast to see exactly what it meant. I was fairly certain I knew what it meant, but for some reason I felt drawn to look it up. I decided I better listen to that little voice inside me telling me to get out the dictionary. Here are the five definitions that were listed for the word steadfast:

1. fixed in direction; steadily directed: a steadfast gaze.
2. firm in purpose, resolution, faith, attachment, etc., as a person: a steadfast friend.
3. unwavering, as resolution, faith, adherence, etc.
4. firmly established, as an institution or a state of affairs.
5. firmly fixed in place or position.

I almost had to laugh out loud as I saw how the verse in Psalms and the verses in Proverbs went together! We need to fix our eyes on the Lord so we can see where we are going. We will know if we stray off the path because it will feel different. As we walk on the firm paths and keep our eyes fixed on Jesus, we have the confidence and assurance of knowing we will not fall. This means our hearts as well are fixed on Jesus! No matter what comes our way, we can sing praises to our God because we know where we are headed and that He is with us all the way!

God's Hand of Protection

2008-07-28T19:21:00.003-04:00

In the past two weeks, our family has experienced a few incidences that turned out to be great teachable moments for our kids to see God's hand of protection on our family.

On Thursday July 17th, we had gone out to run a few errands before eating dinner at Cici's Pizza (which just opened in our area a month or two ago but quickly became our favorite place to go!). As we were driving, we noticed the sky was quickly getting dark and knew a storm was about to hit...and boy did it ever hit! Once the floodgates opened, we were hit with a lot of wind, rain, thunder, and lightning. We stopped at a traffic light on a heavily traveled road and I heard a sound that I can only describe as a "pop". My daughter thought it was thunder, but I said it didn't sound like thunder. I didn't want to turn around and look because we were driving into Allentown and the thought actually crossed my mind that someone may have just been shot! The light turned green and as we started to drive away, my husband commented that the car behind us was pulling off to the side of the road. I then wondered if the person had gotten a flat tire and that's what caused the weird sound. We finished what we had to do and as we came back down the road on the other side, we noticed the car that had been behind us was still off to the side of the road. As we drove past, we noticed there was a car behind that one with the front end all smashed in. It was then that we realized the car directly behind us at the light had been rear-ended, yet they never hit us! On this particular road, cars are usually very close to one another when they stop at lights so we knew that God had protected us. My kids envisioned an angel standing behind our car stopping the car behind us from hitting our car.

On Saturday July 26th, we went over to my parents' house to go swimming. We were swimming for awhile and my husband said "we should get going soon". For some reason, I allowed the kids to continue swimming for awhile longer. When we did finally get ready to leave, my mom said the kids could have some muffins she had made that morning. I didn't want them to eat them there since we hadn't eaten dinner yet, so I told them to pick which kind they wanted (she had made blueberry ones as well as chocolate chip) and I'd put them in a bag so they could eat them later. Micah couldn't decide which one he wanted, so my mom finally said to just take what was left (there were four...just enough for each of us!). We were just about to leave and my dad stopped us and said he wanted to give us some blueberries so I could make blueberry pancakes (since Sarah made a comment about wanting me to make them and I said I didn't have blueberries to make them with! LOL!). So we finally got going later than we wanted to, but we quickly discovered it was no accident that we had experienced those "delays"!

We had only driven a few minutes when we came upon an accident that had happened just minutes before. The police and rescue workers weren't even there yet! There were 2 cars involved...one car had an older woman in the driver's seat leaning out of her car with a stunned look on her face. The other car was a jeep. There were at least 2 male occupants that had been in that car. The one was lying face down on the side of the road and the other was walking around with blood all over his face and shirt. I almost got out to see if there was anything I could do to help, but I saw someone already had a cell phone calling for help and another lady was standing in the street directing traffic and telling us to go. I didn't want my kids to see anything that would give them nightmares so we continued to drive.

A few miles down the road, we saw why the police and other rescue workers hadn't arrived at that accident yet....they were already at the scene of another accident!! We had to take a short detour because they had the road blocked, but we came out at a light and could see the accident that had also occurred on the very road we travel home on. We noticed two rescue vehicles were headed towards the first accident we saw, so my kids and I all prayed for the safety of those involved in the two accidents as well as the paramedics, firefighters, and police that were responding to those accidents. This is something we always do when we see an emergency vehicle with its lights and sirens on, although my son usually prays for them even if they don't have their lights and sirens on!

When we finally made it home, I pointed out to Sarah specifically the various delays that had occurred before we left and that any one of those (or a combination of some of them) prevented us from being involved in one of those accidents. I then told Sarah a few stories of some close calls I have had in my life and when I was done she said "Now I KNOW God is real!" I couldn't help but smile and thank the Lord for His protection, and how it enabled me to teach my children more about God.

What? Me Worry?

2008-07-22T17:41:00.005-04:00

Psalm 27:1 says "The Lord is my light and my salvation - whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life - of whom shall I be afraid?" I know there are definite times in my life that I find it hard to NOT worry about a situation. What an awesome thing to realize that we don't need to be afraid of anything!

The Lord is my light: I don't have to stumble around wondering whether or not I'm following the right path. All I need to do is seek the Lord and He will make it clear! He will show me the way to go. He is the light I need in the dark times. I have the promise that He is always with me!

The Lord is my salvation: First and foremost, He has forgiven all of my sins! I don't need to worry about what I did in the past or all my failures. They are forgiven....and forgotten! Praise the Lord!! He will save me from the snares the devil sets before me. I don't need to be afraid of what lies ahead because I know He will walk with me through it all!

The Lord is my stronghold: There are times I have faced things that I THOUGHT were too hard, but as a Christian I have the promise that He will NEVER let me go through anything that is too hard for me! He knows what I can handle, even when I don't believe it myself. There are times when the best thing to do is just rest in His loving arms. The Lord is always there to give me the strength I need to continue.

So the next time you are tempted to worry about something, remember that there is no reason to be afraid of anything that comes your way because the Lord is on your side! He will be your light, your salvation, and your stronghold. He is EVERYTHING that you need!!

Vacation!

2008-07-16T07:27:00.003-04:00

My husband has vacation this week. WOO HOO! We aren't doing anything very fancy because we couldn't afford it, but we are having fun and that's what matters anyway!

After church on Sunday, we went to the Lehigh Valley Zoo (it use to be called Trexler Game Preserve) with our good friends and their 2 boys who are Micah's age. We are members at the zoo so we didn't have to pay anything to get in. We had four free passes as well, just enough for our friends and their kids so they didn't have to pay either! To "thank us" for giving them free passes, they took us out to lunch.

Monday we went to McDonald's for lunch and allowed the kids to play in the play place for about 2 hours. After that, we went bowling. The bumpers came up when the kids bowled and went down when my husband and I bowled. I was the biggest loser! LOL! Oh well, it was fun anyway!

Yesterday we went to the airport to see my dad (or pappy to the kids) since he is a police officer there. My husband also works there so the kids got to meet some people their daddy works with and some their pappy works with. My dad drove them around the airport in the police cruiser so they could see the airplanes and stuff. He turned the sirens and lights on once, which made Micah just beam! Sarah and Micah got to wear police hats for a little while and they had little badge stickers so they were walking around pretending to be police officers. Micah usually says he is going to be a either a fireman or a police officer when he grows up. He is REALLY into firemen and fire trucks, so he was really excited to see a fire truck as we were driving around the airport. Sarah mentioned that I had promised Micah that one day I'd take him over to the fire house in town (it is right up the round from our house) and see if they'd let him sit in the fire truck (she remembers being put in the truck when she was little even though it scared her to death! LOL!). Well my dad saw the fireman coming out to get in the truck so my dad pulled in and asked if he would mind giving a ride to his grandchildren! The fireman said sure and you should have seen Micah's face just light up! I wish I had brought my camera!!! I bet you could have seen Micah's smile from a mile away! He was beaming from ear to ear from the second he got into the truck to the time he got back out! LOL! My dad said the next time we come down to visit, he'll see if he can get one of the firetrucks to spray water for Micah. I will DEFINITELY be bringing my camera next time!! The kids also got to meet the canine officer at the airport! Sarah was scared of the dog at first because he is big, but she soon warmed up to him. The dog loved the kids too and was constantly coming over to be petted or to sniff or lick them. The kids thought it was hysterical when pappy locked their mommy and daddy in a jail cell. After we left the airport, we took the kids to Chuck E. Cheese for lunch and allowed them to play all afternoon. When it was time to pick prizes, it took quite a while for them to choose what they wanted; but they both finally settled on cotton candy (Blue for Micah and Pink for Sarah....how appropriate!) and a little rocket launcher. They had a blast shooting their foam rockets all over the house when we got home! It was a long, but extremely fun-filled day for the kids!

If the weather remains as nice as it has been all week, we are going miniature golfing today and then we'll probably go swimming at my parents' house. Thursday we'll need to do laundry to make sure we have enough clothes for the weekend so we may just play some games and stuff at home and have it be a more relaxed day.

Friday we are leaving to go up and see Bob's family. The two nights in a hotel will cost us more than we spent the entire week on everything else we did! Bob's niece has a little girl who is turning 1 on Saturday and they are having her party at Knoebels Amusement Park. The party doesn't start until 2 pm, but we're going to get there first thing in the morning and spend the whole day at the park with the kids. That should be a great way to end our vacation!

I'm Surrounded!

2008-07-09T09:13:00.002-04:00

I noticed something really neat this morning during my devotions. I was reading Psalm 32 and noticed a word that was used in two verses. Verse 7 says "You are my hiding place; you will protect me from trouble and surround me with songs of deliverance." and verse 10 says "Many are the woes of the wicked, but the Lord's unfailing love surrounds the man who trusts in him."

I immediately began to think about what it means to be surrounded. If something is surrounded, it means it is enclosed on all sides. It is hard to escape if you are surrounded. It is also hard for someone else to get to you if you are surrounded.

I realized that when we are in the center of God's will, we are surrounded by God. That is truly an awesome place to be because it makes it harder for Satan to attack us! Most people think that it is a bad thing when they hear someone yell "I'm surrounded!!" My prayer is that we ALL are able to say "I'm surrounded....by God!!"

Freedom

2008-07-03T09:48:00.003-04:00

Tomorrow is the 4th of July aka Independence Day where we as Americans celebrate our freedom. That was on my mind as I opened the Bible to read this morning. The song "I Am Free" also came to mind (it happens to be the 11th song on my Playlist in case you wanted to listen to it). I then started to read and just had to smile at how the thoughts God had placed in my head before I started to read the Bible had prepared me for a particular verse that God obviously meant for me to take notice of while I read.

Psalm 25: 15 says "My eyes are ever on the Lord, for only he will release my feet from the snare." I read that and God let me know that the word "release" could be replaced with the word "free". I had to say OK God! I get it! You are trying to teach me something about freedom today! What do you want me to learn? Well here it is!

Where are most traps placed? Are they placed up high? No! They are placed on the ground so that a person or animal walks or steps into it. Many traps snap shut to prevent what was captured from escaping.

When we fall prey to one of Satan's snares/traps, it can be easy to focus on the trap and we try to get ourselves free. Many people have stepped into one of Satan's snares and they don't even realize that they are trapped! They are limited in where they can go because Satan has ahold of them. Some Christians may eventually be able to get out of one of Satan's traps, but it will take a LONG time. We also remain injured for a long time, which means we can be captured again easier because we aren't as strong as we were before.

What we need to do if we find ourselves trapped in one of Satan's snares is to immediately look to God for help. He can free us from the trap AND heal our wounds so we stay strong and can possibly avoid falling into that same trap again. We will be stronger after being freed from one of Satan's traps because we looked to God and allowed Him to free us from the trap. By allowing God to release/free us, our wound won't be as bad and it will heal quicker and easier than if we tried to get out of the trap by ourselves. By keeping our eyes on the Lord, we can also AVOID some of the snares Satan sets before us because the Lord will lead us around the traps.

So the next time you find that you have become ensnared in one of Satan's traps, don't look at the trap....look at GOD! Only He can truly free you from what ensnares you. For those of you who have been wounded by one of Satan's traps, look to God and ask Him to heal you. You will be truly free when you keep your eyes on God because He will never lead you into a trap!

I Trust You

2008-06-30T08:54:00.004-04:00

I am so thankful that the Lord gave me Psalm 16:8 at the beginning of last week! In case you didn't read my last post, Psalm 16:8 says "I have set the Lord always before me. Because he is at my right hand, I will not be shaken." That verse came to my mind often last week, and it gave me the strength I needed to make it through each struggle I had to face. I'm sure it will continue to come to mind in the coming days and weeks because there is definitely a spiritual battle going on in the life of someone close to me.

This person has been a Christian for a long time, but this person has been praying for a few things for a long time and has become frustrated that those prayers aren't being answered. It is so hard when we feel as if the Lord isn't answering our prayers, but I also know that sometimes God's answer is one we dont' want to hear. I told this person yesterday that sometimes God's answer is "No" and maybe that's the answer the Lord gave. "No" is a hard answer to hear and sometimes we just don't like it and/or don't want to accept that answer. Sometimes God's answer is "wait", but people often grow tired of waiting and either feel that the Lord is never going to answer their prayer or they decide to take matters into their own hands. It is during these times that we need to truly trust that God does know what's best even when it feels we can't take it any more.

Today I started to read Psalm 20. I was amazed at the first 2 verses which say "May the Lord answer you when you are in distress; may the name of the God of Jacob protect you. May he send you help from the sanctuary and grant you support from Zion." because that's exactly what I needed to hear! When I read verse 4 which says "May he give you the desire of your heart and make all your plans succeed.", I really felt my heart struggling with a feeling of "WHY isn't that happening?!" I kept reading and had to smile when I read verse 7 which says "Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the Lord our God." I just knew God was showing me that I just need to keep trusting Him in this situation.

You can't force someone to trust in God. It is something they need to do themselves. For now I will do what I can: I will trust God to answer the prayers of this individual in a clear way so that there is no way the answers can be ignored, and for this person to ACCEPT the answers God gives to those prayers. I will pray for the main situation that is causing this person to have so many doubts to be resolved quickly. Finally I will pray for that person to come to the realization to just keep trusting God and not lose faith.

I know some people know this, but God gave me words to my first two songs in April. The words to the first song have really been going through my mind a lot and I find myself singing it often. I know the Lord was preparing me for what was to come and I am in awe of His love for me! I have shared the words to this song with only a few people so far, but I just felt like I needed to share it here. I hope you all enjoy it. The title of this post is also the title of my song.

I TRUST YOU

VERSE 1:
Sometimes it may seem
Like nobody cares
And even Jesus
Just doesn't seem there
But that's when your faith
Needs to take over
Just lift up your hands
And say to the Lord.

CHORUS:
I trust you when life is easy
I trust you when life is hard
I trust you with my whole life
Because you gave your life for me.

VERSE 2:
Jesus never said
Life would be easy
But He did promise
To never leave you
So you can be sure
That He's always there
So praise the Lord and
Sing with assurance

CHORUS:
I trust you when life is easy
I trust you when life is hard
I trust you with my whole life
Because you gave your life for me.

BRIDGE:
Trust in the Lord
with all your heart
and lean not
on your own understanding
in all your ways
acknowledge Him
and He will direct your paths

CHORUS:
I trust you when life is easy
I trust you when life is hard
I trust you with my whole life
Because you gave your life for me.

Don't Be Shaken!

2008-06-23T09:05:00.002-04:00

This morning I picked up my Bible to do my devotions. I had a situation that was weighing heavily on my mind when I started to read, and the Lord seemed to light up the words to one verse in particular. Psalm 16:8 says "I have set the Lord always before me. Because he is at my right hand, I will not be shaken." I immediately sensed the peace that only comes from God. It was just so awesome to feel the presence of the Lord letting me know He knows all about this situation and He is right there with me. I can rest in Him and know that He is in charge. I will NOT be shaken! It is so easy to worry and be fearful of what is unknown, but fear is not from God! We need to just give those fears to the Lord and then rest in His loving arms.

I also had a sense of guilt as I looked at the first part of that verse. Do I always set the Lord before me? How often do I try to just do things on my own? It seems that sometimes only when things get too tough to handle do I turn to the Lord for help. I was reminded that I should start every day with turning everything over to the Lord and asking Him to lead the way. If the Lord is leading the way, all I need to do is FOLLOW HIM because I know He will never lead me the wrong way! I know I'll still have to go through sorrows, trials, temptations, etc, but I can have the assurance that the Lord is with me and I do not need to be scared. There is no reason to be shaken when the Lord is in control! I know I will be able to handle whatever comes my way because the Lord is right beside me!

I Love Music

2008-06-20T13:12:00.003-04:00

I'm sure you will quickly notice a change on my blog. I now have music playing! YEAH! I absolutely LOVE music and I chose some of my favorite songs to put on my playlist. I'm impressed I was actually able to figure out how to do it! I hope you enjoy the songs I chose. The first song that is playing is the one I currently say is my favorite song. The FIRST time I heard it on the radio, I knew I just had to have the CD with that song on it. I must say that Chris Tomlin has so many amazing songs that my entire playlist could be filled with just his songs! I chose a few of my favorites that he sings, but I also included other songs by other artists.

The second song on the list has a special meaning to me. The first time I ever heard the song "I Want To Be Just Like You" was when our choir was learning it. I was pregnant and shortly thereafter suffered a miscarriage. It was a real struggle to sing the song at first, but the song took on a whole new meaning when I finally had a child. I hadn't thought of the song for a long time, but it immediately came to mind when we were going to have our son dedicated. I asked a good friend and her husband to sing this song, and I don't think there was a dry eye in the church. All I could do as they were singing the song was hold my precious little boy who we had tried for so long to have and thank the Lord for His faithfulness. I know I am not always the best example to my kids, but I try to be and I am not ashamed to apologize to them when I acted in a way I am not proud of. I can only hope that my children see Jesus in me and come to know, love, and serve Him the way I do.

You can stop the music if you find it distracting as you read (just hit the pause button on the playlist. I think it is the first button...the one with 2 vertical lines). I would encourage you though when you are done reading to turn the music back on, open a new window, surf the web or whatever you need to do, and just let the music play in the background. I hope these songs lift you up, encourage you, and help you worship our wonderful Lord.

Storms

2008-06-17T12:54:00.004-04:00

Last night around 5 pm, I heard a weather report that a severe thunderstorm was headed our way and we were under a watch until 6 pm. I looked out the window and had a hard time believing a storm was coming because the sun was shining brightly! Within 15 min., the weather had changed drastically! The sky had grown black and the wind was blowing hard! Our lights flickered and the kids ran to get their little flashlights. I grabbed a flashlight and lit a candle just in case since the flashlight we have isn't always very reliable for staying lit very long. It turned out we didn't need to get any of those things because the wind died down and the dark clouds passed by within about 15 min. We didn't lose power at all. As I blew out the candle, I thought about why I had lit that candle in the first place. I had been preparing for the possibility of losing power. Why light a candle? So we could see in the darkness! If the lights had gone out, we wouldn't have been able to see much at all in the house. The kids don't like the darkness so the light would help to ease their fears.

What do we do when storms come into our lives? Sometimes we know a "storm" is coming so we can prepare for them in advance. If we know someone is very ill, we start to prepare for the fact that they are probably going to die unless a miracle takes place. Those storms don't seem quite so bad because we were able to prepare for them before they hit, but what about those storms that strike without any notice? When a loved one or especially a young child dies unexpectedly, is involved in a devastating accident or is diagnosed with an illness, things seem to grow dark very quickly. How can we possibly move forward? How can we see where to go and what to do next? We turn to God: our eternal light! It is in those darkest times that His light lets us know that He is there with us. We can even feel the warmth of His presence. If we look to Him, He will guide us through the darkness.

When things are going great in our lives, it can be easy to take for granted the fact that God is with us because we may not see His light shining as bright as it does when it is dark. When the storms hit, we are instantly reminded of the fact that God is there because we look for Him! Make sure your relationship with God is always strong so that when the storms hit, you won't have to worry about whether or not God is right there with you. His light will never go out and you can be sure that He will be with you throughout every storm you face.

My Dad

2008-06-13T13:49:00.014-04:00

Father's Day is coming up in just a few days so first of all let me say Happy Father's Day to the guys who may read this! I know some of the guys who read this may not be fathers yet and are wondering why I would wish them a "Happy Father's Day", but I said it to all guys because you do have an influence on children whether you know it or not. That being said, make sure you are setting a GOOD example for all the children who may be watching you!

Some children don't have much of a role model when it comes to a father. A child's relationship with their heavenly father may not be all it can be if their earthy father didn't set a good example of what a loving father is. I've been blessed with a wonderful earthly father who made it very easy to have a wonderful relationship with my heavenly father. I just love my dad more than words could ever say! I couldn't have asked for a better dad!

I have always looked up to my dad, and not just because he's so tall! My dad is a police officer and was always very protective of his three girls. When someone would be picking on us on the school bus, my dad didn't have a problem with coming onto the bus and setting the bully straight. Sometimes all he needed to do was stand out in front of our house in his police uniform. You could audibly hear the kids on the bus wondering who this big police officer in our front yard was, so we would gladly yell "DADDY!!!!!!!" as we got off the bus and run to give him a big hug. It was amazing how any bully was more than willing to find someone else to pick on after meeting or just seeing our dad!

Even though my dad is big and strong, he also is very gentle. We always knew how much he loved us, even when he needed to discipline us. He showed us what it means to be a loving father and a strong Christian. He persevered through many tough times and never gave up. Hmm...I wonder if that's one reason why I am so stubborn? That can be a GOOD thing when it means sticking to your beliefs and not backing down regardless of what people say about you, which I had to do a lot being a Christian in a public school!

On October 19, 2007, my dad went hunting like he does every year. As he was getting into the tree stand, he noticed the stand was loose. He started to climb back down to tighten the ropes, but the stand swung around and my dad fell 15 feet and landed on his back. He knew he had broken his back, but he had no idea whether he had any internal injuries. He didn't have his walkie talkie so there was no way of calling for help, so he laid there and yelled for help for over 4 1/2 hours with no response. He also did a lot of praying and singing during that time. Thankfully my mom has a strong sense of ESP and knew something was wrong when he wasn't home when he said he would be. My dad always leaves a note when he goes hunting letting mom know where he will be and when he'll be home. He always is home at that time or will call if he is tracking a deer and will be late. Mom was able to convince my uncle (dad's oldest brother) that something was wrong and he went out to look for him.

Just the fact that my uncle found my dad's car is a miracle since dad was hunting that day on someone's property that has MANY acres to it. My uncle thought dad had his walkie talkie with him and had been driving around calling him on it. He finally felt the Lord tell him to put the walkie talkie down, get out of his car, walk and YELL. So my uncle, who was wearing shorts and not dressed at all to be walking through the woods, started to walk into the raspberry invested area where dad's car was parked in front of. He walked for awhile and kept yelling, but he wasn't getting any response. He was just about ready to give up and call the police for help when he felt the Lord tell him to "go a little farther and yell again". My uncle obeyed, and my dad heard him! My dad said after laying there for over 4 1/2 hours not knowing if he was ever going to be found in time, the sound of his brother answering him "I'm on my way!" was the sweetest thing he had ever heard.

My dad wound up with 3 broken vertebra in his low back. At least one of them was a burst fracture, but all the pieces went away from the spinal cord. My father had no internal injuries and was NOT paralyzed after falling 15 feet! We all knew this was a miracle and we knew exactly who to give the praise to! Thank you God!! My dad spent just a few days in that hospital and he then was moved to a rehabilitation hospital. It was really hard seeing my dad who I had always seen as this big, strong guy being in so much pain and needing so much help. He use to walk a few miles a day, and now he was having trouble taking just a few steps. I was just thankful that he was alive and able to be taking those few steps!

God continued to answer our prayers and dad continued to get stronger. He was discharged less than a month after the accident...using just a walker to walk. How fitting that a few days later, we were able to celebrate his birthday...at home! Dad had to wear a back brace for a total of 3 months. About 2 months after the back brace came off, he went back to work! It truly amazes me that my dad broke 3 vertebra in his back and was back to work as a police officer less than 5 months later! GOD IS GOOD!!

As Father's Day approached this year, I realized how lucky I am to still have my dad here to celebrate this day with him! I am so thankful that God watched over my dad that awful day in October. My dad is living proof that our God still performs miracles! I always knew my dad was special, and I'm so glad God still had a purpose for my dad to be here with us!

I LOVE YOU DADDY!!

My Life Is Truly Blessed?!

2008-06-08T19:28:00.002-04:00

I'm sure by now anyone who has read my blog, or anyone who happens upon it and starts to read from the beginning, is probably wondering why I chose the title I did for this blog. Maybe you've wondered "How can she say her life is truly blessed when her neighbor next door is most likely a drug dealer and has given them trouble for over 6 years ago?" or maybe "How can she say her life is truly blessed when her sister died unexpectedly at the age of 28?" No, my life is not perfect. I've had to deal with trials and sorrows just like everyone else in this world. The difference is in how I deal with those things when I'm faced with them.

My life is truly blessed because I have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ! I know I can put my faith in Him because He is the creator of the universe so I know He knows EVERYTHING. He knows all about ME and what I'm going through. He is with ME every day! He loves ME! He died for ME! He gave EVERYTHING for me. I have never been alone when I faced these struggles in my my life. He has always been right there with me. I have the assurance of knowing that He always will be with me no matter what I may have to face in this life. Yes, I am truly blessed because I can call Jesus my friend!

Obey....the FIRST time!

2008-06-04T12:25:00.012-04:00

Since September, my husband and I have been attending a parenting class at our church using the video series based on the book "Shepherding a Child's Heart" by Ted Tripp. The video series has Ted Tripp discussing the concepts he covers in his book. It only meets the first Sunday of the month, but it has been well worth our time! I have tried putting some of the stuff into practice, but it wasn't until this past Sunday that I really had my eyes opened to the importance of consistency when teaching your children to obey.

My daughter is 9 years old and is VERY strong-willed. She can be very mouthy and wants everything to be HER way. We have tried various forms of discipline, but nothing seemed to work for very long. I've come to discover much of that is MY fault because I was not being CONSISTENT with the discipline. I also learned that I should have been teaching her to obey me the FIRST time I said something. It was pointed out in the video on Sunday that kids learn real quick when to obey. I smiled when I heard "When mom gets to 3, then I'll obey." because I've used that counting method and have gotten results that way. However, I recently started telling my kids that if I said "3", it was too late. "When dad starts yelling, then I'll obey." may be another way kids decide when to obey. My kids seemed to think the best way to know when to obey would be "When mom starts screaming, the veins in her neck start to bulge, her face is beat red, and her eyes look like they are going to pop out of her head....then I'll obey."

Ted Tripp then made a comment that I may not get verbatim, but it was something like this: Why not teach your children to obey the FIRST time you say something? That's really what you want so why are we not teaching it? Those questions almost made me fall off my chair! Maybe I should have because I could have said OUCH! and the rest of the class wouldn't have realized I was saying ouch because of those questions and not because of the fall. (OK, maybe the ouch would have pertained to BOTH things then! LOL!). I realized immediately after hearing those questions that we had not been teaching our children to obey us the first time. I would give a zillion warnings to stop doing whatever it was our daughter (and now our son) was doing or I would just let it go because I was busy doing something else. Don't get me wrong, we still did plenty of disciplining. There were some days all I felt like I did was yell at my kids and/or discipline them! What I realized though was I needed to be CONSISTENT if I wanted them to learn how to obey me!! (DUH! How could I have been so stupid?!)

Ephesians 6:1-3 are the verses that the next analogy came from. Those verses are "(1) Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. (2) Honor your father and mother - which is the first commandment with a promise - (3) that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth. Ted Tripp said that we want our children to live "inside the circle". The boundary of the circle is HONOR and OBEY your parents. When children are within the circle, they experience "long life" and things "go well" with them. It is a path of BLESSING when children stay inside that "circle"! When children disobey or dishonor their parents, they move outside of the circle. This is a dangerous place to be! Would you want your child to be in danger? Of course not! In order to get our child back into the circle, we need to discipline them. It is because we LOVE our child that we discipline them. We want them to have long life and have things go well with them. We also want them to experience all the blessings that living "in the circle" brings...because when they are obeying and honoring their parents, they are obeying and honoring God!

I came home from that class determined to start showing my kids just how much I loved them. I explained to them that things were going to change and they were going to learn to listen the FIRST time I said something. I told them I wasn't being a very good parent because I had allowed them to disobey and dishonor me and hadn't punished them for it the first time. I would warn them too many times to stop what they were doing and then by the time I would discipline them, I was mad or angry and then I was sinning because I am not suppose to discipline out of anger! I explained to them about living "inside the circle", what happens when they disobey or dishonor their parents, and what needs to happen so that they can get back inside the circle. I also told them what Ephesians 6:1 says. My daughter already knew the verse, but my son didn't.
It only took 2 days for our son to remember what Ephesians 6:1 says. Micah doesn't know the verse verbatim like Sarah does; but when I ask him what that verse says, he answers "Obey your parents." That's good enough for me!

The first time Sarah disobeyed me after I had decided to implement this, I asked her what Ephesians 6:1 says and she angrily grumbled "obey your parents". I remained calm though and had her say it again (the WHOLE verse since I knew she knew it). I then explained how she was outside of the circle and that was dangerous. She needed to be inside the circle and because I love her so much I had to discipline her to get her back into the circle. She seemed to understand...and ACCEPT...that she needed to be disciplined, and she didn't give me any struggle or argument. I was SHOCKED! Now when I say to do something and my child (or children) don't do what I said, all I have to say is "What does Ephesians 6:1 say?". They both know when I ask that, they have to tell me what it says...and then immediately do what I asked them to do. Sometimes when they hear me ask that question, they will simply stop what they were doing and do what I asked right away.

So obedience means doing something the first time you are asked. I also learned on Sunday that obedience is to be done WITHOUT complaining, making excuses, or delaying. My daughter is infamous for using all 3 of those things when we ask her to do something! I'll hear "Do I have to?", "I don't want to!" or "I want ....!" when we ask her to do something she doesn't want to do. She also seems to always have some excuse as to why she did or didn't do something and why she shouldn't be punished for disobeying. "He did it first!" seems to be her favorite excuse. My reply to that use to always be "He is 4 years old. You are 9 years old and YOU know better!!" I also know I've heard "Just a minute!" or "I'll do it in a minute!" when I ask Sarah to do something. That is called delaying and is not part of obedience because your child is basically saying "I'll obey you.....in MY time."

I'm amazed how much calmer I have been in the past few days since I began disciplining the first time one of my children disobeys, rather than giving far too many warnings and becoming angry because they aren't listening. My daughter still tends to get mouthy, but I've been able to control my temper and tell her I'm not going to argue with her. She is dishonoring me when she talks to me like that and I'll remind her that she is not in the circle when she does that. I'll ask her what Eph. 6:1 says and she'll tell me. Then I'll ask her what needs to happen and why, and she'll tell me that as well. She still needs to work on her temper, but I'm confident that she'll learn that a lot better as long as I continue to keep MY temper under control.

Obviously my children have not suddenly become perfect angels who never do anything wrong. They still try to exert their own will, do stuff they shouldn't, fight with each other, etc. They do however realize that when mommy says "stop it", they had better listen the first time or suffer the consequences! I do not always give that warning. There are some things that my children know are not tolerated at all so they know they will be disciplined immediately if they choose to do one of those things.

I am fully aware there are different forms of discipline and not everyone agrees with all of them. I'm not writing this to try and force parents to all use the same form of discipline that we use. I'm writing this to encourage parents to teach their children to obey the FIRST time you say something, and then BE CONSISTENT with issuing discipline if your child does not obey you. As parents, we LOVE our children and it is out of love that we need to teach them things that they will need their entire lives. Disciplining my children is not something I enjoy doing, but I love my children with all my heart and I want them to grow up to be trustworthy adults.

If a child doesn't learn to obey his/her parents, how will that child learn to obey other people in authority? How will that child learn to obey GOD?! It is our job as parents to teach our children to honor and obey us so that they can then grow up to honor and obey those in authority and most importantly GOD!

The Classics

2008-06-02T18:24:00.005-04:00

This afternoon as I was making lasagna, I decided I wanted (needed?) to listen to some music. I went out and selected a Ray Boltz CD. When the music started, I realized this wasn't the Ray Boltz CD that I thought it was; but I decided to just keep it on since I really liked the first song. The CD I listened to is entitled "The Classics", and boy did God just bless me as I listened to each and every song on that CD!!

I'm sure most of the songs on the CD you've heard before, but some I haven't heard in a very LONG time. I guess the reason they are considered "Classics" is because they will bless you regardless of how many times you hear the song! The songs on the CD were Great Is The Lord; He's Alive; O Lord, You're Beautiful; Rise Again; I Wouldn't Go Back; Awesome God; People Need The Lord; Through It All; We Will Stand; If That Isn't Love; and The King Is Coming. I just couldn't help but praise the Lord as I sang along with each song.

I tried to get my two children to quit talking and playing so loud and listen to the words of the songs, but they just were more interested in what they were doing to pay attention. It didn't seem to matter though because in spite of all the noise (and the fact that I was putting the lasagna together), I was still able to focus on the words. I just couldn't help but worship the Lord! I had put the lasagna in the oven to bake and was washing the dishes when the last song came on.

The last two songs on the CD are ones I haven't heard in a very long time and both of them really spoke to me, but the last song brought me to tears...of happiness! I told my children that they had to stop talking, sit down, and just listen to this song again. I explained to them what the song was talking about, even though Sarah already knew because she had heard a few words in the chorus as it was playing the first time. I started the song again, and just stood there in our living room with my eyes shut. The tears started to flow again and it was only when Micah (my youngest) touched my leg did I open my eyes. He was standing there looking at me and quietly asked "Why are you crying mommy?" I told him they were happy tears because this song was about when Jesus comes back again and we go to heaven and see Him. He smiled and said "I want to go to heaven!" I sat down on the floor so Micah could sit on my lap and I rocked my son as I went back to worshipping with my eyes shut. I felt Sarah come over to cuddle up next to me too, but the tears were flowing again and I just focused on thinking about that wonderful day.

In case you don't know the song, these are the words to the chorus of "The King is Coming":

O the King is coming, the King is coming
I just heard the trumpets sounding
And now His face I see
O the King is coming, the King is coming
Praise God, He's coming for me.

If you have Christian CDs or tapes that you haven't listened to in awhile, take them out and listen to them again. I especially encourage you to listen to ones that may have "classics" on them! Songs may be considered "old", but the messages found within Christian songs are eternal and will never be outdated!

Stepping Out in Faith

2008-05-29T20:36:00.005-04:00

Today I decided to take the kids for a walk and then go over to the park in town so I could let the kids play and take some pictures. Micah is all boy and just loves to climb all over the place. He usually wants to do everything that his big sister does, so I tend to watch him closely and tell him when there is something that he just can't do yet. Today for some reason, he didn't follow his sister everywhere. He was so busy climbing and running around and doing what HE wanted to do that I just stood back and watched what he could really do.

There is a pole that Micah always wants to slide down because he feels like a fireman then, but he usually has his daddy there to help him get onto it and gently hold on to him in case he lets go. Today he was busy doing everything on his own that I was a bit nervous when he went over to that pole; but he knew when he needed help because he looked at me and said "I need help mom!" So I held onto his waist and then told him to go ahead and lean over and try to grab ahold of the pole. I can remember when he was too small and couldn't reach that far, so it was a little bittersweet to see him reach out and grab that pole fairly easily. Then came the hard part....holding onto the pole, stepping off the platform, and wrapping his legs around the pole. I held onto him pretty good the first time because I was so scared he was going to let go of the pole and fall. He did pretty good though and then he started to slide down. I actually didn't even have my hands on him when he slid down that first time. I just had them REAL close in case he started to fall.

He was so proud of himself when I told him that I hadn't even held onto him as he slid down the pole! He asked for my help the next two times whenever it was time to step off the platform and wrap his legs around the pole, but the last time he didn't want my help. He wanted to try to do it all by himself. I still had my hands close by just in case he needed me, but he did everything on his own....except he slid down the pole a little too fast and didn't put his legs down on the ground soon enough. He bumped his upper lip on the pole when he hit the ground, but it didn't bleed or anything so I knew he was ok. He looked at me like it was my fault though, but I told him he did a GREAT job and just needed to remember to not slide down the pole quite so fast next time and he needed to look where he was going so he knew when to put his feet down.

As I sat here tonight thinking about our day, I realized how that "fireman's pole" is a good example of our walk with the Lord. When we are walking through trials, God is right there holding on to us and letting us know that He has us. Sometimes God asks us to step out in faith and do something we may not think we can do. "I need help Lord!" we may say, and He is always there saying "You can do this! I'm right here with you! I'll help you if you need it." It is so exciting when we take that step of faith and find out that we really could do a lot more than we thought we could! If we take our eyes off of where we are going, we can get hurt. Sometimes we may try to take things too fast and get a bit of a boo-boo. If we pay attention to God telling us when and where to go and keep our eyes fixed on our destination, we don't have anything to fear. We have the assurance that God is always right there beside us.

My Little Drummer Boy

2008-05-25T19:49:00.007-04:00

Edited: Here's the pictures!

My son is 4 years old, and absolutely LOVES the drums! We bought him his first drum, a plastic Little Tikes drum with plastic drumsticks that are attached to the sides of the drum so the child doesn't lose them, when he was 2 years old. Last year he decided he needed to have another drum because he wanted to have "real drumsticks...like Cliff!" Cliff is the man who plays the drums at church. My son has always watched Cliff very closely on Sundays and will imitate whatever Cliff does. His plastic drumsticks were just no good anymore because Cliff had wooden ones, so that's what my son had to have too. So this past Christmas, we bought him a little drum with wooden drumsticks.

He really started to imitate Cliff then! One Sunday during worship team rehearsal, Cliff threw one of his drumsticks. A few days later, our son threw his drumstick. Why? Because Cliff did it of course! A few weeks ago, one of the ladies who sings on the worship team with me said to me "You do realize you are eventually going to have to buy him a drum set don't you?" to which I replied "I know, but we just can't afford it right now." I had looked at a set at Christmas time, but we just didn't have that kind of money to spend on it.

This morning as I practiced with the worship team before church, I had to smile as I watched my son "drumming" as he intently watched Cliff. He held out his two index fingers and used them as drumsticks as he drummed in mid-air, and every so often he'd hit his daddy. At first I wasn't sure why he would hit his dad, but I quickly realized he hit him every time Cliff hit the cymbal (or "the cush" as our son calls it....I assume because that's what he thinks they sound like when they are hit so whenever he is drumming and he wants to pretend to hit a cymbal, he yells "CUSH!"). I teased my husband afterwards that I saw he was "the cush" while our son was drumming and he laughed while he shook his head in agreement.

We came home from church, grabbed some lunch, and then left to do some shopping. A few hours later we returned and after putting everything away, we went upstairs to start getting the kids ready for bed. My husband realized he forgot his electric screwdriver outside the night before so he quickly went downstairs to get it. We knew it hadn't rained last night so it should be ok, but we weren't sure it would still be there since we live in town and our backyard is not fully fenced in at the back so anyone can come into our yard if they really wanted to steal something they saw. Well my husband opened the back door and was surprised at what he found right outside the door on the top step: a dark blue (our son's favorite color!) drum set, complete with a little stool for him to sit on!

My husband brought the drum set in and put it in the living room. Then he called our son down because he knew he just couldn't allow him to go to bed before he saw this! Our daughter came down first and my husband was quick to tell her to "BE QUIET AND DON'T SAY ANYTHING!" because he knew she'd ruin the surprise for her brother. So, she put her hand over her mouth when she saw the drums, most likely in an effort to NOT say something! LOL! Our son comes down, takes one look at the drums, puts his hand over his mouth (like he sees his big sister doing), and then finally gasps "Oh my!". He then quickly grabbed his drumsticks that he had from the drum we bought him at Christmas and started pounding away. The smile on my little boy's face was just priceless. I don't have a digital camera, so you'll just have to wait until I get my film developed to see pictures. Sorry! LOL!

There was no note so we are not sure who left it there for him, but we have a few guesses who it might have been. I am trying to find out who left it because our son wants to thank the person! He didn't want to quit playing, but he made sure to tell me he was going to play his drums tomorrow as soon as he gets up....and I have no doubt at all that he'll be up bright and early and ready to hit those drums! LOL! As I headed back down the stairs after putting him to bed, the last thing I heard my little boy say was "I love my drum set mommy!".

We live just down the road from a fire station. When my daughter was 3 years old, she was terrified of the fire alarm because it is really loud. It always goes off at noon, so I told her that was just the lunch whistle so that one didn't scare her any more. When it would go off other times, I taught her to pray for the firemen and whoever needed help. She quickly learned to not be afraid and to this day she comes running to pray with me whenever the alarm sounds. My son learned to do the same because he saw what we did every time the alarm sounded. He decided to take it a step further though...he will pray whenever he sees a fire truck, police car, or an ambulance. He initially started to pray if he saw one of them with their sirens and/or flashing lights on, but then he started to pray for them even if they didn't have their lights and sirens on. He is very quick to pray for me if I say I'm not feeling good. He truly loves Jesus with all his heart.

Tonight as I sat here thinking about how thankful I am to the person(s) who thought of our son when they saw this drum set and brought if here for him, a verse came to mind. Psalm 37:4 says "Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart." As cute as I think it is that my son watches Cliff intently and does everything that he does, I want even more for him to look to Jesus and do what he knows God wants him to do. I just have to think that God wanted to bless our little 4 year old boy with a set of drums because He knows our son loves Him and He wanted him to have something that would make him happy. I feel so thankful and yes blessed because I know that it was a desire of MY heart for our son to have a drum set because I knew how much he would love it. Isn't it amazing that God loves us so much that He cares about the smallest details?!

In case the person who gave our son these drums is reading this: THANK YOU for allowing God to work through you and be a blessing to our family, especially our little boy! May the Lord bless you for your thoughtfulness!

To everyone else: Don't miss out on being a blessing to someone! Listen to that still, small voice that tells you to do something nice for someone. You may not think a phone call, letter, or even a gift may be much, but it may be exactly what that person needed at that time. How exciting to know that God sometimes uses US as an instrument to bless someone else! Be a blessing to someone today, and I know YOU in turn will be blessed as well!

Wendy: sister, friend, angel

2008-05-23T21:56:00.007-04:00

I've been thinking of writing about this shortly after I started my blog. I had the title in my head, but I just wasn't sure I could write it. After reading a post on another person's blog, I was inspired to go ahead and write about my sister. I hope this will help someone who reads this to see that God does not make mistakes. We may not understand why bad things happen, but God is faithful. He holds our hands through the difficult times and eventually helps us to see that good CAN come out of the bad things we may experience along life's road.

Wendy was a wonderful daughter, sister, friend, wife, and mother. She was only here on this earth for 28 years, but the memory of her didn't die with her. She made an impact on many people's lives. Wendy knew from the time she was little that she was going to be a pastor's wife. In 1988, that "dream" became a reality when she married a man who was studying to be a pastor. She also knew she wanted to have lots of kids. She struggled with infertility, but the Lord knew her desire to be a mother and blessed her with children. She also dealt with the pain of losing 3 baby girls, but she never lost her faith in God. She was in the hospital after giving birth to triplets and due to a "mistake", she was given the wrong medicine and wound up having a severe allergic reaction. She died while her husband watched helplessly as the doctors tried to save her.

The day she died was a Sunday. I had gone to the altar that morning to pray for the babies since they were born prematurely and were fighting for their lives. I called Wendy when I got home to let her know what I had done, but she wasn't feeling real well so she said she'd call me later. I told her I'd be at mom and dad's house and to call me there. When the phone rang in the afternoon, I told mom that was Wendy calling to talk to me. It wasn't Wendy. It was Joe, calling to tell us that Wendy had died. I'll never forget that day. I knew from my mom's frantic voice what had happened, but I didn't want to believe it. Then I heard her scream and I knew my fears were real. It was unfathomable to think that God would have let something like this happen. She was a mom, with three small children at home and three babies in the hospital. This couldn't be happening! Yet it was.

In November, it will be 14 years ago that my sister died, and yet I can still remember that awful day like it was yesterday. I wish I could forget it, but I know I never will. I know there are stages of grief, yet somehow I seemed to get to the acceptance stage very quickly. Somehow, in spite of the grief I felt over the unexpected loss of my sister, I just knew that God had a plan and He was in control. A few hours after Wendy died, one of the babies died. The next day, another past away. One baby...a boy...survived. I knew it would have been devastating for my sister to lose more children, so I found comfort in knowing that God had called her home before the babies. I could almost imagine her rejoicing in heaven when she was reunited with her three girls who had died 3 years before; and then rejoicing again when she saw two more of her children.

I guess it was because my sister loved children so much that I figured God must have called her home to heaven because He needed help with all the children up in heaven. Somehow that thought stuck with me. As a result of going through the loss of my sister, I have been able to sympathize with and comfort others who were struggling with the loss of a loved one. I was also able to give a little bit of comfort to a few women who experience the loss of a child because I would tell them about my sister and let them know I truly believed she was taking care of their child until God called them home. I myself have been through 3 miscarriages and found comfort in the thought that Wendy was holding them and taking care of them until I am able to hold them myself one day up in heaven.

One night a few months after Wendy died, I had a dream about her. I vividly remember driving my car into my parents' driveway. I saw Wendy standing on their porch. I knew she was dead so I was wondering why she there. I got out of the car and she came over to me and hugged me. When she released me, I asked her "Why didn't I feel that?". She smiled and said, "It's ok. I forgive you." She hugged me again....and I FELT it! I woke up immediately and just started to cry because I could still remember the dream, and her embrace. I didn't realize until that moment how much I had been beating myself up over not going down to visit her sooner. She lived in Maryland and I lived in Pennsylvania. She kept asking me to come down for a visit and I kept putting it off because I was in college and it was such a long drive. I finally had told her that I would come down in March because I had a two week break between internships (it was my last semester of school). She teased me "Yeah, I'll believe it when I see it!". She died three and a half months before my visit. I did go down for those two weeks because I wanted to keep my promise, and I knew her husband could use my help with the kids. When I awoke from that dream, I just knew God had allowed Wendy to visit me in a dream to let me know she had forgiven me for not visiting her sooner. Most of the time, I wake up and have no knowledge of any dream I might have had while I was asleep. If I do remember that I had a dream, I don't remember it for very long and the details usually aren't very clear. Fourteen years later and I can still remember that dream just as vividly today as I did that night! Since I can still remember that dream fourteen YEARS later, I know it was no ordinary dream!

Wendy's oldest two children graduated from high school last year and I couldn't help but think of how proud their mom would have been of them. I made sure to tell them that too. I'm sure they appreciated the reminder, even though I'm sure they already knew that. I know she would be so proud of the wonderful people all four of her children are becoming. I know I just have to smile when I look at her children. They all have such a beautiful Christian spirit and I just know their mom, the angel, is looking down from heaven and smiling.

Yes, Wendy wasn't here very long, but the things she did while on this earth still live on. When she was in high school, she decided she wanted to start a group where Christian kids could get together after school to have a Bible study, pray, and just fellowship with one another. She was well aware that being a Christian in a public high school was not easy and this would be a way for fellow Christians to get together and offer support to each other. The administration of the high school practically made her jump through hoops, but she never gave up and they eventually agreed that she could start the group. The first meeting of Kids For Christ only had about 5 kids attended that meeting. My sister and I were 2 of them. One was a teacher because the administration insisted that it had to be "monitored" by a member of the faculty. Wendy found a teacher who she knew was a Christian because she knew asking just anyone could lead to trouble if they didn't like these kids praying together. Today it is about 25 years later, but that Kids For Christ group is still running strong in our high school! The last I heard, the group consistently has an attendance well into the double digits. I'm sure the kids who attend now don't know that it was Wendy who fought so hard for that group to be started, but what an awesome testimony to the fact that one person CAN make a difference! I'm sure she would never have imagined that the group she started would continue to last and grow and make an impact on so many young lives in that high school.

I know God put my sister on this earth for a reason. She did what she was suppose to do, and then God called her home. I don't know why he took her so early. I can think of so many other things she could have done and accomplished while she was on the earth, but I know God knows the reasons why and I know His will is best. A song by Steven Curtis Chapman keeps running through my mind. The words to the chorus are:

His strength is perfect when our strength is gone
He'll carry us when we can't carry on
Raised in his power the weak become strong
His strength is perfect
His strength is perfect.

I know that is how I got through those difficult days and weeks that followed the death of my sister. God gave me the strength to keep believing in spite of the hurt. Someone I worked with, who was not a Christian, gave me what I still consider to be a huge compliment. He asked me how I was doing and then said "I knew you'd be ok because you have an incredible amount of faith." I am not one who boasts of being a Christian. I usually do my best to live my life in a way that shows people what Christianity is all about. It was comforting to me knowing that this man did see the difference in me, and he knew exactly what was going to get me through the most difficult time in my life. God will NEVER leave you or abandon you and I KNOW He will be there for you no matter what comes your way!

I miss you Wendy! I love you! I know one day we'll see each other again, and I can hardly wait!

Don't Fuel The Fire!

2008-05-22T21:18:00.003-04:00

Memorial Day is next week and I'm looking forward to going over to my parents' house and having one of my dad's world famous (to our family anyway) hamburgers that he makes on the grill. Can you cook on a grill without some sort of fuel? No! Without a supply of fuel, there won't be a fire. Think about a campfire. How can you keep one burning for hours at a time? You need to keep putting more wood on it because it will eventually go out once the wood is consumed.

Proverbs 26:20 says "Without wood a fire goes out; without gossip a quarrel dies down." Just a few days ago, I wrote about the trouble we've had with our neighbor. Well, God has a way of reminding us that sometimes there IS something more we can be doing. In some cases though, sometimes we need to be doing LESS! Do you know of someone who irritates you? How easy is it to complain about that person, and everything that person says or does? I know it is very easy for me to complain about something our neighbor does. What I didn't really realize until today though is that the irritation I feel whenever he does something else is being fueled by how much we complain about everything he does. It is easy to keep remembering all the bad stuff he has done so when he does something new, it irritates us immediately and just adds fuel to the fire so to speak. God challenged me today to quit complaining about him, and see if the irritation I feel towards him decreases. If I stop complaining, I cut off the supply of fuel that is needed to keep the fire of irritation and frustration going.

So I'm challenging you to do the same thing. If there is someone in your life that really irritates you, don't complain about all the things they have done. If you are reminded of something they have done, try to get your mind focused on something else. For me, singing a song is the easiest way for me to focus my thoughts on something positive. It is hard to be frustrated or mad if I'm singing a song of praise to the Lord! If possible, focus on positive things about that person specifically. Let's see if we can get rid of the feelings of irritation, anger, frustration (it could be any negative feeling you have) towards individuals in our lives by cutting off the fuel supply.

Just a Little Reminder

2008-05-20T22:30:00.006-04:00

I just love when God gives me a verse just as a reminder to let me know He is there! As I begin typing this, it is 1o:30 pm and I realized about 15 min. ago that I hadn't done my devotions today. I got a late start this morning because it was rainy and cold and I just didn't feel like getting out of bed. So I decided even though I'm tired, I'd read the devotional book that I haven't read the past few days because I was simply reading a chapter in Proverbs each day and then journaling. Well, I guess this can be considered my journal for today! A verse that I have heard many times before just seemed to be in bold print when I read it this evening. It's a verse I'm sure most of you know quite well too, but I just have to share it with you!

Romans 8:28 says "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." I just felt God reassuring me that He knows EXACTLY what we are going through and why, and He is right there with us. Things WILL get better and hopefully we all will see that we are stronger because of what we went through. God LOVES us and wants what is best for us. How amazing is that?! He knows exactly what is best for us. It doesn't mean we'll enjoy going through difficult times, but isn't it awesome to know we can just rest in the arms of our Lord and know that He is taking care of us?!

Dealing With The Enemy

2008-05-19T10:05:00.007-04:00

I was reading my Bible this morning and came across some verses that seemed to just jump out at me. They made me think of all we've been going through with our one set of neighbors. First I'll tell you just a little bit about our neighbors. We've lived here for about 5 1/2 years now, and we've had trouble with these people almost from day one. We park our cars perpendicular to our house. Our neighbor parks his car parallel to his house. For some reason, our neighbor seems to think he has to drive onto our property, back up, come back onto our property, and back up again in order to park his car. There are many times he comes within INCHES of hitting my car. We've seen other people pull into that spot without touching our property, so why does he feel the need to do it EVERY TIME he comes home? Our answer: he's just being a jerk. Sorry, but there just isn't a better way to say it.

At first, we tried to just ignore the whole thing. Then one afternoon, I had just finished buckling our daughter into her carseat in my car (she was 3 years old at the time) and I got into the car myself. I hadn't even closed the door yet when I was startled to see our neighbor come flying in and stop within inches of my car. I realized immediately that if he had shown up just seconds earlier or if I had taken a few seconds longer, he would have hit me or possibly even our daughter. I could feel the anger welling up within in me, but I said nothing to him. When I told my husband what happened, he was furious! We felt like we now had to teach our daughter to look both ways before you go out the front door! One evening I was at worship team rehearsal at church and our neighbor came home. Since my car wasn't there, he decided he could then drive his entire car onto our property and come within inches of my husband's car! He drove forward and backwards numerous times, for no reason other than he knows it aggrevates my husband and wanted to get him mad. Well, it worked! My husband was upstairs and he opened the window and yelled at our neighbor to stay off of our property. The neighbor responded by threatening my husband that he was going to come up there and throw him out the window!!

We have put up with this neighbor using a snowblower and blowing ALL of his snow onto our property EVERY winter, stealing a No Tresspassing sign my husband put up in an effort to keep him from driving onto our property, cursing at us and yelling that they wish we would be dead when we came home one night (which my daughter heard them say and caused her to burst into tears), constantly antagonizing my husband to come fight him in the street, screaming at my husband and kids to "walk in the middle of the street" because they are "too close" to his car (there are no sidewalks on our street and we are not about to tell our kids to walk down the middle of the street!), and many other things! This guy even issued a false statement to the police about how my husband "drove recklessly and almost hit him with his car while he was stuck on ice". What actually happened was the neighbor sped through a field and then went onto the road in order to cut my husband off. He then drove really slow until he finally SLAMMED on his brakes. My husband was aware that the guy was up to something so he was driving slow enough that he was able to stop in time and avoided hitting him. The guy then got out of the car and told my husband to "get out!". My husband said no and then drove around the guy's car when he got back in his car. There was NO ice at all that day, yet the neighbor got away with issuing that statement without the police ever coming to get my husband's side of the story! The charges were later dropped when my dad, who just happens to be a police officer himself (but our neighbor doesn't know that), called the police officer in town who filed the charges and told him exactly what was going on and pointed out that charges should NOT have been filed since NO ONE witnessed the incident and it was simply the word of a man who has been harrassing my husband for YEARS now. I love my dad!! LOL!

The police in town are fully aware of the trouble we are having with this neighbor, but they do nothing about it. My husband has issued complaints with the police about our neighbor a few times and yet the police keep telling us there is nothing we can do because it is a civil matter. My husband was even told one time by a certain officer that if he issued one more complaint against our neighbor, they were going to arrest BOTH of them (my husband and the neighbor) and have the courts settle it. Last summer one police officer admitted to my husband that we have "the neighbors from hell". We have STRONG suspicions, as do others in town that have talked to us about it, that our neighbors are drug dealers. The only thing we can figure is that the police don't bother with our neighbor because he is a volunteer firefighter in town. Aren't police suppose to PROTECT the civilians instead of allowing one of them to get away with doing whatever he wants just because he is a volunteer firefighter?! Sigh. We obviously try to not get sucked into our neighbor's constant attacks against us and we just try to avoid having any contact at all with him. We have been wanting to move for a long time, but we simply don't have the finances to do that. The past few days my husband has just been really frustrated with the whole situation and feels that God hasn't answered our prayers and this neighbor just continues to "win".

I've tried telling my husband that this is truly a spiritual battle we are having with this neighbor. It is obvious this guy is not a Christian! When we first moved here, his car had a big face of the devil on the back window and a smaller face on the side of his car. I sensed early on that this guy didn't hate "us" per se, but he hated CHRIST who is IN US! I told my husband that we can't expect this guy to act "like a Christian" when he isn't one. It is easy to think that this guy should have been taught right from wrong and at least know how to act civil, but we knew this neighbor's dad (yes, the guy is in his 30s or 40s and still living at home. His dad died last year.) and he was just as mean, nasty, and rude to my husband as his son. I guess the saying "like father like son" is true!

So getting back to what this was all about in the first place (sorry, guess I just wrote another LONG blog), I read Proverbs 24 today. I noticed I had one verse underlined already, verse 10. That verse says "If you falter in times of trouble, how small is your strength!" I read that and thought of my husband and how he is feeling right now. I figured I should save that verse and let him read it because maybe he needs to be reminded that God WILL give him the strength he needs to continue to deal with our neighbor and he shouldn't feel abandoned. Then I continued reading and was convicted by Proverbs 24: 17-20 "Do not gloat when your enemy falls; when he stumbles, do not let your heart rejoice, or the Lord will see and disapprove and turn his wrath away from him. Do not fret because of evil men or be envious of the wicked, for the evil man has no future hope, and the lamp of the wicked will be snuffed out.". OUCH! We really haven't seen the neighbor "fall", but I was reminded of some times when we thought it was funny that he was having so much troubles with his cars and almost felt like he deserved it for all he had done to us. It's almost like we felt like saying "HA! That's what you get for messing with a Christian!"

It's easy to pray a sort of "get him God!" prayer when you are faced with people like this. We NEED to pray for them, but it needs to be one of asking God to get ahold of that person's heart so they can see Him and come to know Him. We can ask for God's protection against any harm this person may want to bring against us, but we also should be praying for us to be Godly examples to them. Those are hard prayers to pray when all you really want is to get away from this person (for us we want to either move or have this guy get arrested and spend a LONG time in jail)! I realize we haven't always been a good example of God's love to this guy and maybe that's one reason why we are still here.

I'm not saying that my husband has been wrong when he yelled at this guy because the guy was endangering the safety of our family. I realize our attitudes toward this guy haven't always been pleasing to God, and we need to make sure we work on that so that our kids learn the right thing to do when they are faced with people who are hard to love. I want them to know they can fully trust God to help them each step of the way. It doesn't matter what happens, God is always there and He will give them the strength to handle it in a Godly way. When you know you may have to face an enemy, pray each morning for God to help you if a situation with the enemy arises. Sometimes you may need to walk away from the situation and not say anything at the time, especially if you are really angry at the time. It may mean saying a silent prayer for God to give you the wisdom to know what to say before you open your mouth. The important thing to do is not to lose faith when it seems the enemy is always "winning". As Christians, we are promised the ultimate victory! Keep your eyes on the prize!

My Little Miracles

2008-05-16T09:27:00.009-04:00

This morning I was thinking about what I could share with all of you to help you get to know me a little more. I started to think about my kids, and what I went through to have them. I know many of the people who may read my blog already know about it, but there may be people who come across my blog and don't know about it so I figured I'd share my story and maybe it will help someone know that they are not alone in their struggles.

My husband and I were married in May 1997. Tomorrow is actually our 11th anniversary! We found out in September 1997 that we were expecting a baby. This came as a total shock to us since we were not ready at all to have a baby yet since we hadn't been married very long. I had wondered how difficult it would be to get pregnant because my cycle was very weird (my cycles at the time ranged from 29 days to 144 days! Most of the time I easily went 2 - 3 months between periods), so it was sort of a relief to know that I could get pregnant! We were just starting to accept the fact that we were going to have a baby and were getting excited about it; but I experienced a miscarriage 2 weeks after I found out I was pregnant. It devastated my husband and I, especially because we had announced we were pregnant since we were excited and then people would come up to congratulate us and we had to tell them we had lost the baby. We decided to wait until our one year anniversary and then start trying to have a baby.

We celebrated our one year anniversary and began trying to have a baby. We had success immediately because just a few weeks later, we found out we were expecting! We didn't want to tell many people this time because we were both afraid of another miscarriage. A few weeks into the pregnancy, I started with the "morning sickness". For me, it was not just in the morning though. It was an all day event and I wound up needing to be hospitalized because I could not keep anything down and was vomiting constantly. UGH!! I was in the hospital for 2 weeks that first time. They put a PIC line in so I could be "fed" intravenously and was sent home. A few days later, I was experiencing redness and pain in my arm where the PIC line had been put in so they removed it for fear it was becoming infected. About a week later, I was back in the hospital for another week because the vomiting had returned. They didn't want to put another PIC line in so I was discharged once the vomiting stopped. I was able to go 2 weeks with little to no vomiting, but then it returned and I was admitted to the hospital for the third time and stayed another week. I was sick of being sick by this point and just wanted it to stop! I realized after I had that thought that I really wanted this baby and I didn't mean it like it sounded. Thankfully I knew God understood how I felt. I lost a lot of weight during the first 1/2 of my pregnancy, but thankfully the vomiting finally left and I was able to enjoy my pregnancy for awhile.

I was working full-time while I was pregnant, but we decided that it was my job to raise our child so I planned on quitting my job about a week or two before my due date and get ready to be a stay at home mom. I submitted my resignation at the beginning of January 1999. A few DAYS later, I got a call from my OBGYN's office telling me that I needed to come in as soon as possible and that I might be having the baby that night! It was 6 WEEKS before my due date so I was stunned and wondered what was going on. The receptionist told me I had a high level of protein in my urine which was a sign of preeclampsia, a dangerous condition for a pregnant woman and her unborn child! I called my husband and he came to pick me up because I was so upset that no one at work wanted me to make the one hour drive home by myself. We arrived at the doctor's office and they were surprised that my blood pressure was not sky high like it usually is when a woman has preeclampsia, but they admitted me to the hospital and decided to give me steroid shots to help the baby's lungs mature in the event that I needed to have the baby prematurely. They did an amnio. the next day to check the maturity of the baby's lungs and then we had to wait 24 hours to see what the results were. The doctor told me a few hours later that it really didn't matter what the results were in 24 hours because they had decided that it would be better for both the baby and for me if I had the baby now, but they would wait those 24 hours just to give the baby's lungs a little more time to mature. The results came back and I was relieved when I was told the baby's lungs were mature! They induced labor and just 3 hours later, our daughter was born weighing in at 5 lbs 8 oz!

My OBGYN was amazed that I delivered my first baby so quickly, but he knew that I deserved an easy delivery after all I went through during my pregnancy! All of the doctors and nurses in the hospital were amazed that our daughter was so healthy and such a good size for being 6 weeks early, but I knew all the praise and glory belonged to the Lord because He was in charge and He knew exactly what she needed. There wasn't a doubt in my mind that He allowed her to grow quickly in spite of how sick I was during the pregnancy. I knew she was truly a miracle baby! As I was holding our daughter after she was born, my husband looked at her and quietly said "She should have had a brother or sister." I knew immediately that he hadn't forgotten the first baby we had lost, and I loved him all the more for that. I was discharged after 2 days, but the doctors decided they wanted to keep an eye on her for at least one more day because she had jaundice. The hardest thing in the world for me to do was leave her in the hospital that one extra day! She was discharged the next day, although the doctor warned me she may have to be readmitted if the jaundice didn't clear up. We prayed about it and within a few days, our little baby girl had no sign of jaundice! Again, all the praise went to the Lord because we knew He had touched her!

Since I had such a rough time with that pregnancy, I was in no hurry to have another baby. Our daughter was almost 3 years old before I started to think about having another baby. We decided to start trying, but we had a much more difficult time conceiving. It would be 2 years and 2 miscarriages later before we had our second baby. Actually, I believe I had 2 miscarriages during that time even though only one of those was confirmed. I had a very weird cycle in April 2002 with cramping for a week before my period showed up and I had never had that happen before or since then, so I'm fairly certain I lost our second baby at that time. In January 2003, we found out we were expecting and we excitedly told everyone since we had been trying for 1 1/2 years at this point to have another baby; but we lost that baby just a week and a half later. Again, we were devastated and I just couldn't understand why God would finally allow us to get pregnant just to take that baby from us. I finally accepted it though because I knew God knows what is best for us and He always has a plan. I know now that I am able to relate to other women who struggle with infertility as well as miscarriages and I am able to help them during those difficult times because I've been through it myself.

About a week after the miscarriage, we were in the mall and I stopped at a table outside of a Hallmark store because they had discounted items on it...mostly Christmas items. I picked up an ornament that had a sleeping baby angel on it and just knew I had to have it. Through tears, I showed it to my husband and simply asked if we could buy it. I didn't need to tell him why. He quietly nodded yes. We both knew what that ornament represented. Every Christmas, that ornament is the first thing on our tree. I put it on myself and quietly remember our baby angels that are up in heaven waiting for us to meet them one day. I didn't think of it at the time, but it was rather appropriate that the baby angel in that ornament was a girl because I began to have a strong feeling that the last baby we lost was a girl. I actually think all the ones we lost were girls, but it is just a feeling I have and we have nothing to prove whether that is true or not. I know one day we'll know for sure. Anyway, I never thought of naming the first baby we lost. I was fairly young when I chose the name I wanted for my first daughter should I ever have one and there was not a doubt in my mind to use that name when our daughter was born. After that, I chose the name Hannah Faith for our next daughter. I think that is why when I felt so strongly after that last miscarriage that the baby we lost was a girl and her name was Hannah. I know one day I will meet her because she is waiting up in heaven for me!

A few months later, we became pregnant again and I knew this one was a keeper when I started throwing up a month or so later. Who would have thought I would be so happy to be so sick! LOL! I was admitted to the hospital for less than a week, but they put the PIC line in and sent me home. I was hesitant about having it because of how my body rejected it during my first pregnancy, but I didn't have a problem with it this time. The doctor decided to remove it after a month or so even though I really didn't think it was a good idea. I knew I had been sick well into my 2nd trimester the first time, but he thought I was going to be fine. Well, I guess I knew my body better than he did because a few weeks after he had the PIC line removed, I was throwing up again! The PIC line was put back in and this time I told my doctor that I would decide when it was to come out and he promptly agreed to allow me to tell them when I was ready for it to be removed. Once I said it could be taken out, it was removed and I went the rest of the pregnancy without any more vomiting. WOO HOO!

The doctor was monitoring me pretty closely through my pregnancy because I had to take baby aspirin due to a clotting disorder that he found in one of the blood tests they did at the start of my pregnancy and I had that history of preeclampsia with my first pregnancy. He said there was no way I'd make it full term because taking the baby aspirin every day increases the chance that the placenta could break down or something like that so he scheduled an induction 2 weeks before my due date. I stopped taking the baby aspirin a month before my due date because it thins the blood and that wouldn't have been a good thing to be happening when you give birth! A week after I stopped the baby aspirin and a week before my scheduled induction, I went in for what was suppose to be a routine doctor visit and non-stress test (which they had been making me do a few times a week for at least a month). I had been having contractions off and on so I wasn't surprised when the nurse asked me if I knew I was having contractions. What I wasn't expecting was the doctor telling me that the baby's heart rate was really low and she wanted to send me to the hospital to be monitored. Thankfully my husband was with me and we went over to the hospital in spite of having no bags or anything else with us.

I was monitored for an hour and the doctor decided to induce labor because I was having contractions, had started to dilate a little, and the baby's heart rate was still low. I just kept thinking "Lord, you can't take this baby! We tried for 2 years to have this little boy (we found out this time we were having a boy) and I just can't lose him now that he's about to be born!" I put it in the Lord's hands and tried my best to not worry anymore. Thankfully I wasn't in labor very long with this one either, although I experienced back labor this time and I would never wish that upon my worst enemy! OUCH!! For those of you who may be wondering, I didn't have an epidural with either one of my deliveries....even though my nurses both times thought I was nuts and kept asking if I wanted one. LOL! Our son was born in February 2004 and weighed 7 lbs 7 oz. We realized that he too was a miracle baby because when I delivered the placenta, the doctor discovered it had torn in two! If I had not had that doctor's visit, I would never have known that our baby boy was in trouble. He probably would have died before we knew there was a problem. I just praise the Lord for keeping our little boy safe!

I hope I didn't bore you all too much with this LONG post. It just kept flowing out of me once I started to type so I felt I was suppose to say it all. Hopefully this helps someone. I don't know what any of you who are reading this have gone through in the past, what you are currently going through, or what you will go through in the future. I do know this: God is ALWAYS with you! He will NEVER leave you or forsake you! You can trust in Him because He has a plan for you and He knows what is best, even when it doesn't seem like it. Don't ever give up on Him, because He never has and never will give up on you!

I have to begin someplace!

2008-05-15T17:25:00.000-04:00

OK, I give up already! I've read a number of blogs from friends and have thought about creating one myself, but I kept putting it off. Well, I decided to not put it off anymore! I do wonder if I'll be consistent at this, so I apologize now to anyone who is reading this just in case this is the only blog you ever read from me!

I began journaling a month ago at the encouragement of the worship team leader at my church. She did a sermon and had free journals for anyone who wanted one. I thought about it, but I decided to let the teens or anyone else who really needed one take them. I figured I could always buy one the next time I was at the store. Well, I guess God knows me pretty well and knew that I would probably forget to buy one on my own. He obviously wanted me to start journaling because we were talking for awhile after church let out and I suddenly felt drawn to look up at the stage. I saw that there were still quite a few journals left, and the tug on my heart let me know I needed to go pick one up! The first time I sat down to journal, it felt so strange but I knew I had to begin someplace. Writing came so easily to me and every time I pick up my journal, I just know the Lord is going to speak to me through the Bible reading that I do that day. It is truly amazing to see how the Lord has answered prayers I wrote down in my journal in such a short time!

I've been reading Proverbs and have felt God telling me over and over again that I need to be more patient. The one day I had gotten upset with something my husband said and I responded by yelling back at him. The next day I picked up my journal and laid it next to me, then I opened my Bible and promptly read Proverbs 15:1 "A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger." OUCH! OK Lord! I hear you!! It's been like that a lot since I started journaling and reading through Proverbs. All I know is God is teaching me that there is a lot that I need to work on and change if I want to see my children change, especially my oldest daughter who is 9 going on 19 (or maybe 29). She is intelligent and VERY strong willed so we butt heads a lot, especially now that I am teaching her at home using a cyber school! To think all this time I thought it was HER who was the big problem, when what I really needed to do was take a long look at myself and see that I was not always responding to her in a Christlike manner. So I am now working on being a better example to my children and to my husband as well.

I know that no matter what happens, the Lord is with me every step of the way! I'm sure you will see (if I keep blogging that is) that my life isn't perfect and we have our share of trials, but I know my life is blessed because God is the head of this family and first in my life. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me! I WILL become the person He wants me to be even though I know it isn't going to be easy or painless. I've been stumbling even though I know what He wants me to do, but I know we serve a God who is forgiving and He hasn't given up on me yet! Thank goodness!