I have to begin someplace!

OK, I give up already! I've read a number of blogs from friends and have thought about creating one myself, but I kept putting it off. Well, I decided to not put it off anymore! I do wonder if I'll be consistent at this, so I apologize now to anyone who is reading this just in case this is the only blog you ever read from me!

I began journaling a month ago at the encouragement of the worship team leader at my church. She did a sermon and had free journals for anyone who wanted one. I thought about it, but I decided to let the teens or anyone else who really needed one take them. I figured I could always buy one the next time I was at the store. Well, I guess God knows me pretty well and knew that I would probably forget to buy one on my own. He obviously wanted me to start journaling because we were talking for awhile after church let out and I suddenly felt drawn to look up at the stage. I saw that there were still quite a few journals left, and the tug on my heart let me know I needed to go pick one up! The first time I sat down to journal, it felt so strange but I knew I had to begin someplace. Writing came so easily to me and every time I pick up my journal, I just know the Lord is going to speak to me through the Bible reading that I do that day. It is truly amazing to see how the Lord has answered prayers I wrote down in my journal in such a short time!

I've been reading Proverbs and have felt God telling me over and over again that I need to be more patient. The one day I had gotten upset with something my husband said and I responded by yelling back at him. The next day I picked up my journal and laid it next to me, then I opened my Bible and promptly read Proverbs 15:1 "A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger." OUCH! OK Lord! I hear you!! It's been like that a lot since I started journaling and reading through Proverbs. All I know is God is teaching me that there is a lot that I need to work on and change if I want to see my children change, especially my oldest daughter who is 9 going on 19 (or maybe 29). She is intelligent and VERY strong willed so we butt heads a lot, especially now that I am teaching her at home using a cyber school! To think all this time I thought it was HER who was the big problem, when what I really needed to do was take a long look at myself and see that I was not always responding to her in a Christlike manner. So I am now working on being a better example to my children and to my husband as well.

I know that no matter what happens, the Lord is with me every step of the way! I'm sure you will see (if I keep blogging that is) that my life isn't perfect and we have our share of trials, but I know my life is blessed because God is the head of this family and first in my life. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me! I WILL become the person He wants me to be even though I know it isn't going to be easy or painless. I've been stumbling even though I know what He wants me to do, but I know we serve a God who is forgiving and He hasn't given up on me yet! Thank goodness!